Burglars Can't Be Choosers - Lawrence Block

   1977; 294 pages.  Book 1 (out of 11) in the “Bernie Rhodenbarr” series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Hard Boiled Mysteries; Crime-Humor.  Overall Rating : 8½*/10.

 

    Sooner or later, even the most careful burglar gets caught in the act.  Bernie Rhodenbarr is a case in point.

 

    The job seemed like an easy one.  Break into an apartment, rifle a desk, steal a blue box.  Someone’s willing to pay him $5,000 to do that.

 

    The guy who lives there, a patron of the arts, is guaranteed to be out that night, attending a show.  Still, Bernie is taking no chances; he rings the doorbell several times before picking the locks on the door.  There’s no answer, which confirms that no one is home, and Bernie is quickly inside and searching through the desk.

 

    That’s when several bad things happen.  First, two policemen come barging through the door, catch Bernie in the act, and read him his rights.  Second, one of the cops checks the back bedroom—something Bernie hadn’t bothered to do because no one answered the doorbell.

 

    It turns out there’s a corpse in there, with its head bashed in.

 

What’s To Like...

    Burglars Can’t Be Choosers is the opening book in Lawrence Block’s “Bernie Rhodenbarr” series featuring a lovable and adept burglar as the narrator and protagonist.  Despite this being his literary debut, Bernie is experienced in his vocation, well-known to some of the police, and has even served a jail sentence for getting caught once in the past.

 

    The story takes place in New York City, the author’s stomping grounds, and I really liked the Gotham “feel” to it.  As you might in a series where the burglar is the hero, the tone is lighthearted and humorous.  The title reference, at 20%, is one of Bernie’s wry views on life.

 

    Unsurprisingly, Bernie manages to avoid being thrown in jail and quickly begins his own investigation into the mystery.  Who is the unfortunate victim in the bedroom?  Why did someone kill him?  Who and why did somebody set Bernie up to take the rap for the murder?  Why  couldn't he find the blue box?

 

    Bernie’s efforts are hampered by the fact that he’s a wanted man and he can safely assume that the NYPD is watching his apartment.  On the flipside, his lockpicking skills allow him easy entry into just about any place he wants to look for clues.  And, as usual (this is my fifth Bernie book), a sultry female is worked into the storyline and gives him sleuthing assistance plus other added benefits.

 

    The ending is above-average.  The case is solved thanks to two key clues.  One clue is there for both Bernie and the reader to notice and later slap their foreheads for failing to recognize its importance.  The other clue Bernie keeps to himself and only reveals it during the accusation scene.  There are a couple of kewl plot twists, one of which occurs after the perp is identified and the case closed.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Momser (n.) : a contemptible person (Yiddish).

Others: Loid (v.); Bokhara (n.); Gama-Houche (n.; obs.).

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.2/5 based on 1,074 ratings. and 172 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.82/5 based on 7,173 ratings and 606 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    A funny thing.  The better your building, the higher your monthly rental, the more efficient your doorman, why, the easier it’s going to be to crack your apartment.  People who live in unattended walkups in Hell’s Kitchen will fasten half a dozen deadbolt locks to their doors and add a Segal police lock for insurance.  Tenement dwellers take it for granted that junkies will come to kick their doors in and strong-arm types will rip the cylinders out of their locks, so they make things as secure as they possibly can.  But if the building itself is set up as to intimidate your garden variety snatch-and-grab artist, then most tenants make do with the lock the landlord provides.  (pg. 4)

 

    “I’m relatively new at harboring fugitives but I’ll do my best to harbor you in the style to which you are accustomed.  Is it called harboring a fugitive if you do it in somebody else’s apartment?”

    “It’s called accessory after the fact to homicide,” I said.

    “That sounds serious.”

    “It ought to.”  (pg. 102)

 

Kindle Details…

    Burglars Can’t Be Choosers goes for $8.99 at Amazon right now.  Most of the other e-books in the series are that price as well, with two exceptions; one at $8.49 and one at $4.99.

 

“I thought you never lie.”  “I occasionally tell an expeditious untruth.”  (pg. 119)

    There’s a fair amount of cussing in Burglars Can’t Be Choosers.  I counted 23 instances in the first 20% of the book, most of which are of the “mild” variety.  Later on, at least one f-bomb shows up.  There are also a couple of rolls-in-the-hay, but those are tastefully done.

 

    The typos were few and far between.  Things like orbungling/or bungling and sub-liminal/subliminal.  I strongly suspect these cropped up in the “book-to-ebook” conversion stage.

 

    That’s about all I can gripe about.  Burglars Can’t Be Choosers is a well-written, enjoyable story where both the Mystery aspect and the Humor aspect shine.  I’m not reading this series in order, and I don’t think I’m losing anything because of that.  If you’re familiar with, and happen to like Donald Westlake’s “Dortmunder” series, you’ll love Bernie Rhodenbarr.

 

    8½ Stars.   One last thing.  At around 25% the Latin phrase “de mortuis” is used.  I’d never heard of it so had to look it up.  The full saying is “de mortuis nil nisi bonum”, which apparently is a famous phrase.  I took two years of Latin in school, and if you saw my grades in those classes, you’d realize why I couldn’t suss out the translation without Google’s help.

Stormy Weather - Carl Hiaasen

   1995; 384 pages.  Book 3 (out of 7) in the “Skink” series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Crime–Humor; Florida Crime-Noir; Beach Novel; Satire.  Overall Rating: 8½*/10.

 

    It’s probably not a good idea to book a week’s vacation in Florida during hurricane season.  But that’s what honeymooners Max and Bonnie Lamb did.

 

    And sure enough, a killer hurricane—the weatherman called it the nastiest one in years—just ripped through the Miami area, wreaking havoc on everything in its path.  That’s okay though, since Bonnie and Max are staying at Disney World, a couple hundred miles north of all the destruction.

 

    Now Max has a romantic idea: let’s drive down to Miami and videotape the aftermath of the storm’s fury.  We’ll concentrate on house trailers.  If we’re lucky we might even film some dead bodies.  Maybe we can sell the footage to CNN.

 

    Besides, the storm is no longer in the area.  What possible harm can come of this?

 

What’s To Like...

    Stormy Weather is the third book in Carl Hiaasen’s Florida noir “Skink” series.  Skink is hands down my favorite Carl Hiaasen character; he’s a former governor of Florida who suddenly quit one day and disappeared into the swamps and marshes.  But he's still alive and well, a fact he trusts with only a very few companions.

 

    Several people in Stormy Weather get killed in addition to the hurricane victims, but this is not a whodunit.   The reader witnesses who the perpetrators are, and the fun is guessing which ones will pay for their misdeeds, and which ones will get away.  You might be surprised by some of those outcomes.

 

    A bunch of storylines are quickly introduced, staffed by a bunch of quirky characters.  Carl Hiaasen then jumbles up both plots and people, and mirthful mayhem ensues.  In the hands of a lesser author this might get tedious and confusing, by Hiaasen handles it deftly.  A couple of budding romances also pop up, but this doesn’t overshadow the book’s main genre: humorous Florida crime-fiction.

 

    The ending has a couple of neat twists, and does a good job of tying up all the story threads.  True love wins out, Skink disappears back into the hinterlands, and after the requisite insurance claims have been filed, repairs commence on homes and house trailers.  Owners can rest assured that their domiciles are now “hurricane-proof”.

    Yeah, sure.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Plangently (adv.) : in a loud, reverberating, and melancholy way.

Others: Spavined (adj.).

 

Excerpts...

    “She tried to cut out my kidneys one night in the shower.”

    “That’s the scar on your back?  The Y.”

    “At least she wasn’t a urologist.”  He closed the book and picked up the channel changer for the television.

    Bonnie said, “You cheated on her.”

    “Nope, but she thought I did.  She also thought the bathtub was full of centipedes, Cuban spies were spiking her lemonade, and Richard Nixon was working the night shift at the Farm Store on Bird Road.”

    “Drug problem?”

    “Evidently.”  (pg. 91)

 

    He lifted her chin.  “This is not a well person.  This is a man who put a shock collar on your husband, a man who gets high off frog slime.  He’s done things you don’t want to know about, probably even killed people/”

    “At least he believes in something.”

    “Good Lord, Bonnie.”

    “Then why are you here?  If he’s so dangerous, if he’s so crazy—”

    “Who said he was crazy.”  (pg. 224)

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.4*/5, based on 3,109 ratings and 418 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.97*/5, based on 18,108 ratings and 1,078 reviews.

 

“The world doesn’t stop for a hurricane.”  “No, (…) but it wobbles.”  (pg. 68)

    The text of Stormy Weather is rife with profanity.  I counted 43 instances in the first 10% of the book, which extrapolates out to a gazillion or so.  There are also a number of references to “adult situations” and some racial pejoratives.

 

    But that’s just par for the course for a Carl Hiaasen novel.  This is my ninth novel by him, and I really like his storytelling and writing style.  The plotlines are complex, yet not confusing.  The action is fast-paced.  The satire is witty.  Best of all are the author’s perspectives on the business activities in his native state, warts and all.  And let’s face it, Florida being battered by hurricanes is an annual occurrence.  You can view that as a chronic drawback, but enterprising souls will see it as opportunities get rich quick via what some people might call scams and rip-offs.

 

    8½ Stars.  Here’s a Spanglish phrase that cropped up in the story: “Sale del carro con los manos arriba!”  Look up its translation.  It may come in handy someday.

Double Whammy - Carl Hiaasen

   1987; 320 pages.  Book 1 (out of 7) in the “Skink” series.  Book 2 (out of 16) in Hiaasen’s (overall) Florida noir series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Crime–Humor; Florida Crime-Noir; Beach Novel; Satire.  Overall Rating: 8*/10.

 

    Do you live in Florida and want to make some quick money?  Here are three easy ways.

 

    Hold a bass fishing tournament.  There are lots of avid fishermen throughout the Southeast that love to enter these, and you only have to pay off one winner.

 

    Build some condos around some lakes.  And by “lakes” we mean any body of water, manmade or natural, no matter how polluted, but one that’s large enough for fishing boats.  If you call it a lake, they will come.

 

    Hold a fundamentalist healing revival.  You’ll need a human who can fake being crippled for this, preferably someone young and cute.  After you perform the “miracle” the believers will shower you with dollars.

 

    Reverend Charles Weeb is both needy and greedy.  He plans to combine all three of those rackets and a lollapalooza of a fundraiser!

 

What’s To Like...

    Double Whammy is an early entry in what I call Carl Hiaasen’s “Florida Crime-Noir” series.  This is the eighth book I’ve read from that collection.   I have not been reading them in chronological order and I don’t think I’ve been missing much.  Amazon prefers to label it the first entry in the “Skink” series.  More on that in a bit.

 

    Our protagonist is the avid photographer and Private Eye, R.J. Decker, sometimes nicknamed “Rage” (a play upon his initials) by special friends, and “Miami” by one of his certifiably nutzo pals.  When Bobby Clinch, a local and not-very-successful bass tournament enthusiast is found dead in suspicious circumstances. Decker is hired to look into possible skullduggery.

 

    The action starts on the first page as Bobby Clinch sneaks out of the house early one morning.  The pacing is fast and the action is often over-the-top, which for this genre, is an asset.  I liked the character development done by the author; Decker, Ott, Fast Eddie Spurling, Skink, and Al Garcia were all interesting people to meet.  Those final two become recurring characters in this series, with Skink appearing in another six installments by Amazon’s count.  And let's give a quick nod to Lucas; his tenaciousness is impressive.

 

    Bass tournaments are the central focus of Double Whammy.  The title refers to a specific type of fishing lure used by the recognized tournament champion in the area, Dickie Lockhart.  To be honest, I’ve never had the slightest urge to participate in a fishing tournament, but while reading this book, I did get an appreciation for how much preparation is done for competing in one, and how much excitement is generated by fifty anglers, all on the same lake, all trying to out-fish everyone else.  And as an added bonus, I even learned how the cheat in bass tournaments.

 

    Double Whammy was first published in 1987, which means it has a lot of "outdated" items.  Decker drives a 1979 Volare, which he notes is  “stylistically the most forgettable auto” around.  That brought back old memories since I drove one of those in the 80s.  His camera uses film — imagine that! — and he has a darkroom in his home where he does his own film-development, a hobby I used to do with my dad in my teenage years.  Cassette tapes are how Decker listens to music, and there were only three Star Wars movies at that time, which you watched on videocassette.

 

    Events build to Reverend Weeb’s three-pronged money-making scheme described above.  The ending is exciting, albeit not particularly twisty, and both the good guys and the bad guys get their just desserts.  One loose end remains, and I doubt it is resolved in the next book: what will happen to Queenie?!

 

Excerpts...

    “Hey, Rage, where you at?”

    “In a motel outside New Orleans.”

    “Hmmm, sounds romantic.”

    “Very,” Decker said.  “My roommate is a 240-pound homicidal hermit.  For dinner he’s fixing me a dead fox he scraped off the highway near Ponchatoula, and after that we’re taking a leaky tin boat out on a windy lake to spy on some semi-retarded fishermen.  Don’t you wish you were here?”

    “I could fly in tomorrow, get a hotel in the Quarter.”

    “Don’t be a tease, Catherine.”  (pg. 119)

 

    “We’re here for the bass tournament.”

    “Is that right?”  Weeb eyed the rowboat disdainfully.  “Sorry, son, but this event’s not open to the general public.”

    Al Garcia said, “We’re not the general public, son.  We’re the Tile Brothers.”  Coolly he handed Charlie Weeb the receipt for the registration fee.  Weeb passed it to Deacon Johnson.

    “It’s them, all right,” Deacon Johnson reported.  “Boat number fifty, all paid up.”

    “You don’t look like brothers,” Reverend Weeb said accusingly.

    “Si, es verdad,” Jim Tile said.

    “Fo sho,” added Al Garcia.  “We true be bros.”  (pg. 268)

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.4*/5, based on 4,881 ratings and 588 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.94*/5, based on 18,429 ratings and 1,120 reviews.

 

“Just one of those days … when you feel like the spit-valve on the trombone of life.”  (pg. 314)

    If you’ve never read any of Carl Hiaasen’s books. Be aware that they generally never skimp on cusswords.  I found 28 in the first 10% of this book, which is about normal.  Racial epithets also are used, and adult situations and nudity occur on a regular basis.

 

    There were only a couple of typos, mind/mine and Scaggs/Skaggs) which still surprised me since I was reading the mass-market paperback version, published by Warner Books.  But since Scaggs was as in “Ricky Scaggs”, I’m wondering if it was a deliberate error to avoid copyright issues.

 

    Also, if you’re of the Pentecostal persuasion, you probably won’t like this book.  And if you’re a dog-lover, you should probably skip it as well.

 

    I enjoyed Double Whammy.  There were no slow spots and there was enough spoofery, wit, and outrageous events (such as the culinary delights of eating roadkill) to keep me turning the pages.  This book would make a great airport or beach read.

 

    8 Stars.  I read Double Whammy during 2023 Banned Book Week (October 1-7), which turned out to be a timely effort since Wikipedia notes that in 2017 the Texas Department of Corrections put this on its list of books that inmates in its state prisons were not allowed to read.  Neither Carl Hiaasen nor I have any idea what the reasoning for this act was.  No policemen are killed in Double Whammy, and in fact, the actions of the two main cops here, Jim Tile and Al Garcia, are quite commendable.

Seven Up - Janet Evanovich

   2001; 337 pages.  Book 7 (out of 28) in the “Stephanie Plum” series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Crime–Humor; Women Sleuths; Beach Novel.  Overall Rating : 9*/10.

 

    Much to bounty-hunter Stephanie Plum’s chagrin, the half-blind old geezer Eddie DeChooch is proving quite difficult to bring in due to his FTA (“Failure To Appear”) court date summons.

 

    Oh, he’s easy enough to find.  He spends most of his time at home, although he also often attends social events, including viewings for deceased fellow-geezers at the local funeral home.  But finding him is one thing, cuffing him and getting him back to Cousin Vinnie’s Bail Bond Agency is quite another.  Eddie DeChooch is one slippery fellow.

 

    Maybe it’s because he’s depressed.  His last cigarette-smuggling caper got busted which had to make somebody in the local underworld very unhappy.  Maybe it’s his health problems.  His eyes need fixing, he’s got a bum prostrate, and his feet get cold.  It's no wonder that all he does is hang out at his house anymore.

 

    Most likely it’s that corpse in his backyard shed.  You know, the one belonging to that spinster Loretta Ricci.  The one with five bullet holes in its chest.

 

What’s To Like...

    Seven Up is another delightful tale in Janet Evanovich’s ultra-popular “Stephanie Plum” series.  So far I’ve been reading these in order, although I am getting the feeling that it isn’t necessary to do so.  All my favorite characters are back, including Lula, Stephanie’s mouthy sidekick; feisty Grandma Mazur, who goes for her first ride on a Harley here; and Mooner, who can be talked into just about anything by dangling a joint in front of him.  Also back are the two studs Ranger and Joe Morelli, both of whom give Stephanie the hots, and one of which she’s engaged to be married.

 

    There are some new faces to boot.  Stephanie’s sister Valerie, a “perfect daughter” according to their mom and therefore a polar opposite of Steph, moves back home, her marriage broken, with her two daughters in tow, one of whom, Mary Alice, is convinced she’s a horse.

 

    There are a plethora of plotlines to keep both the reader and Stephanie occupied, including trying to convince Eddie to give himself up, and finding out why someone would shoot five holes in Loretta Ricci’s corpse AFTER she'd already died from a heart attack.  Various characters go missing and/or get shot, there are wedding arrangements to be made, and of course big sister Valerie needs help coping with her midlife crisis.  Finally, there's the BIG question: who stole the pot roast, and why?

 

    The pacing is brisk, there's action aplenty, and Janet Evanovich's writing is as always, wonderfully witty.  This isn’t really a whodunit – technically Stephanie’s job is to bring Eddie DeChooch and other FTA’s in for rescheduling their court appearances and let the crime-solving to the Trenton Police Department.  But it’s fun to tag along with Stephanie and Lula because you know they’ll stumble into, and somehow help solve, those various crimes and disappearances anyway.  Who knows, they might even run across a clue after accidentally getting drawn into a mud-wrestling match.

 

    Everything leads up to a satisfying ending.  There’s a twist or two to keep you and Stephanie on your toes, and by the end all the criminal plotlines are tied up.  Justice is served, and things are once again well at cousin Vinnie's bail bond agency.  Now if only Stephanie could untangle her pesky love-life tangles.

 

Excerpts...

    “I got a job for you,” Vinnie said.  “I want you to find that rat fink Eddie DeChooch, and I want you to drag his bony ass back here.  He got tagged smuggling a truckload of bootleg cigarettes up from Virginia and he missed his court date.”

    I rolled my eyes so far into the top of my head I could see hair growing.  “I’m not going after Eddie DeChooch.  He’s old, and he kills people, and he’s dating my grandmother.”

    “He hardly ever kills people anymore,” Vinnie said.  “He has cataracts.  Last time he tried to shoot someone he emptied a clip in to an ironing board.”  (pg. 5)

 

    Valerie has always been coordinated.  Her shoes and her handbags always match.  Her skirts and shirts match, too.  And Valerie can actually wear a scarf without looking like an idiot.

    Five minutes later, Valerie had me completely outfitted.  The skirt was mauve and lime green, patterned with pink and yellow lilies.  The material was diaphanous and the hemline hit midcalf.  Probably looked great on my sister in L.A., but I felt like a seventies shower curtain.  (pg. 139)

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Johnson (n.) : (slang, vulgar) a penis.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.6*/5, based on 2,300 ratings and 821 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.14*/5, based on 122,016 ratings and 2,280 reviews.

 

“Holy crap. (…) You shot Jesus.  That’s gonna take a lot of Hail Marys.”  (pg. 105)

    It’s difficult to find anything to carp about in Seven Up.  If you’re keeping tally of “vehicles wrecked” and “bodies uncovered” by Stephanie, as Wikipedia does, here the total in one each.  That’s comparatively tame for her.

 

    And although I’d classify this as a “cozy crime-mystery”, it does contain a moderate amount of cussing, in this case 20 instances over the first quarter of the book.  There’s a nice diversity in those cusswords, with variations of “damn” and excrement expletives leading the way, but with the f-bomb occasionally showing up.

 

    Lastly and leastly, Stephanie’s taste in food has to be criticized.  One of her favorite snacks is  a “peanut-butter-and-olive sandwich”.  I got slightly sick just typing that.

 

    But those nitpicks pale compared to just how much of a light, quick, and fun read this was.  I'm a quarter of the way through this 28-book series, and I’ve yet to be disappointed.  Or, as Lula is prone to say, “Damn skippy!”

 

    9 Stars.

Just Needs Killin' - Jinx Schwartz

   2014; 338 pages.  Book 6 (out of 8) of the “Hetta Coffey” series.  New Author? : Yes.  Genre : Crime Mystery; Humor.  Overall Rating : 7½*/10.

    Hetta Coffey is going to a party.  And a posh affair it’s going to be, too.  Which is quite unusual, given the locale is the Baja California peninsula of Mexico.  Hetta’s going as the guest of her best bud, Jan, who’s been hired for the night by the host of the party, a chap named Hiro Ishikawa.

    Ishikawa’s paying Jan to be his “escort” during the party.  Hmm.  That sounds like there’s some strings attached.  Bedroom strings.  But Jan assures Hetta that no such extracurricular activity is included.  Instead, Ishikawa will be paying her $50,000 just to be his companion as he mingles with the partygoers, with the money going towards funding Jan’s boyfriend’s search for a sunken galleon.

    Man, that seems an exorbitant price to pay for one night’s worth of “everything’s above the board” escorting, doesn’t it?  Is Ishikawa out of his mind?!

    Well yes, as a matter of fact, he is.  Actually, he’s completely out of his head.  Someone has just decapitated him.

What’s To Like...

    I liked the setting for Just Needs Killin’: everything takes place in various towns and marinas up and down the two sides of Baja California..  A lot of it is aboard Hetta’s modestly-sized yacht.  The author’s Amazon blurb indicates she lives on a boat in the same area, and the literary maxim of “write about what you’re familiar with” is put to good use here.

    There are some Japanese phrases thrown in, which I thought was kewl since I know virtually no Japanese.  And some Spanish as well, which I have some familiarity with.  I learned what a “panga”  and a “hotel de paso” are, and appreciated the brief tip-of-the hat to the Kingston Trio, one of my favorite folk groups.  Also, I thoroughly liked the fact that Hetta's an engineer by vocation, even more so that she’s probably a chemical engineer who until recently was working with a copper mine in Mexico.  My company in real life sells chemicals to copper mines in Mexico, so this was a pleasant, unlooked-for tie-in.

    The story is written in the first-person POV, and Hetta reminded me a lot of Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum.   This POV means, however, that a lot of the action – the killings and abductions, for instance – takes place off-stage, so the book verges on being a cozy.  To boot, there is a lot of over-the-top stuff: things like a secret corridor on a boat (huh?), a bad guy brandishing a rather non-lethal weapon and hoping no one notices (oh, come on, now), and the whole idea of two little amateur ladies deciding to take out a Mexican gangster on his home turf (don’t try this in real life).   However, it’s no more far-fetched than the stuff Clive Cussler writes, so if Dirk Pitt’s your idea of a hero, you’ll probably enjoy meeting Hetta Coffey.

     Just Needs Killin’ is a standalone novel while also part of a series.  This was my first Hetta Coffey novel, but I didn’t feel like I missed much by not having read the first five books.  The pacing is fast, the dialogues are amusing, and there were no slow spots.  It’s all about the action.

Kewlest New Word…

Panga (n.) : a modest-sized, open, outboard-powered fishing boat common throughout much of the developing world.

Excerpts...

    “Now, there you go, I am no longer a witness, but a full fledged co-conspirator.”

    I gave her a high-five.  “Thelma and Louise!”

    “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid!”

    “Bonnie and Clyde!”

    Jan lost her grin.  “Uh, Hetta.  Didn’t all of them, like, die?”

    “We all die.”  (loc. 1869)

   “You two lost another anchor?” Chino said at dinner that evening.

    “Lost is such a harsh word.”

    Chino grinned at me.  “What word would you use to describe cutting two anchor lines in less than two months?”

    “Uh, temporarily misplaced?”  One thing for sure, both anchors were incriminating evidence that we were somewhere we were not supposed to be.  “You can dock my pay.”

    “You aren’t getting paid.”

    “See, problem solved.”  (loc. 3579)

Kindle Details...

    Just Needs Killin’ sells for $3.99 at Amazon, which is the standard price for all of Jinx Schwartz’s e-books, including the other seven books in the series, and two other books outside of it.  The 8-book Hetta Coffey series is also available as two 4-book bundles for $9.99 each, which is a nice bit of savings if you intend to read the whole set.

 “When seconds count, the cops are only minutes away.”  (loc. 1184)

    There are a couple quibbles.  I struggled to determine the overall plotline.  It seemed like it couldn’t make up its mind what it wanted to be.  The story starts out as a murder-mystery, but that fades away,  its place is taken by a plot concocted by the heroes to kill the big bad baddie.  Soon afterward, it moves on to “find the treasure”, then pops back to kill the baddie again, and finally switches to a  “find a different treasure” theme.  Mixed into this was a “what to do about dear Aunt Lillian” tangent which never did seem to have any impact on any of the other plotlines.

    All this hopping around of the storylines made for a rather disjointed read.  But I’m new to the series, so maybe this is the norm for a Hetta Coffey tale.

    Then there was the repeated use of ethnic-based wit.  Mexicans and Japanese get stereotyped to death, and even Canadians get poked fun at on one occasion (40% Kindle).  I recognize that some ethnic bantering is inevitable in a setting like this one, but does it have to be the major source of wit?  I’d think Hetta would have a greater appreciation of Mexican culture, being immersed in it as she is.

    7½ Stars.  Setting the quibbles aside, I found Just Needs Killin’ to be a fast-moving, fun, light read, one that’s ideal for an afternoon at the beach or for a stretch on an airplane.  For me personally, it was the perfect reading balance as I continue to slog my way through Thomas Pynchon’s Gravity‘s Rainbow opus.