Double Whammy - Carl Hiaasen

   1987; 320 pages.  Book 1 (out of 7) in the “Skink” series.  Book 2 (out of 16) in Hiaasen’s (overall) Florida noir series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Crime–Humor; Florida Crime-Noir; Beach Novel; Satire.  Overall Rating: 8*/10.

 

    Do you live in Florida and want to make some quick money?  Here are three easy ways.

 

    Hold a bass fishing tournament.  There are lots of avid fishermen throughout the Southeast that love to enter these, and you only have to pay off one winner.

 

    Build some condos around some lakes.  And by “lakes” we mean any body of water, manmade or natural, no matter how polluted, but one that’s large enough for fishing boats.  If you call it a lake, they will come.

 

    Hold a fundamentalist healing revival.  You’ll need a human who can fake being crippled for this, preferably someone young and cute.  After you perform the “miracle” the believers will shower you with dollars.

 

    Reverend Charles Weeb is both needy and greedy.  He plans to combine all three of those rackets and a lollapalooza of a fundraiser!

 

What’s To Like...

    Double Whammy is an early entry in what I call Carl Hiaasen’s “Florida Crime-Noir” series.  This is the eighth book I’ve read from that collection.   I have not been reading them in chronological order and I don’t think I’ve been missing much.  Amazon prefers to label it the first entry in the “Skink” series.  More on that in a bit.

 

    Our protagonist is the avid photographer and Private Eye, R.J. Decker, sometimes nicknamed “Rage” (a play upon his initials) by special friends, and “Miami” by one of his certifiably nutzo pals.  When Bobby Clinch, a local and not-very-successful bass tournament enthusiast is found dead in suspicious circumstances. Decker is hired to look into possible skullduggery.

 

    The action starts on the first page as Bobby Clinch sneaks out of the house early one morning.  The pacing is fast and the action is often over-the-top, which for this genre, is an asset.  I liked the character development done by the author; Decker, Ott, Fast Eddie Spurling, Skink, and Al Garcia were all interesting people to meet.  Those final two become recurring characters in this series, with Skink appearing in another six installments by Amazon’s count.  And let's give a quick nod to Lucas; his tenaciousness is impressive.

 

    Bass tournaments are the central focus of Double Whammy.  The title refers to a specific type of fishing lure used by the recognized tournament champion in the area, Dickie Lockhart.  To be honest, I’ve never had the slightest urge to participate in a fishing tournament, but while reading this book, I did get an appreciation for how much preparation is done for competing in one, and how much excitement is generated by fifty anglers, all on the same lake, all trying to out-fish everyone else.  And as an added bonus, I even learned how the cheat in bass tournaments.

 

    Double Whammy was first published in 1987, which means it has a lot of "outdated" items.  Decker drives a 1979 Volare, which he notes is  “stylistically the most forgettable auto” around.  That brought back old memories since I drove one of those in the 80s.  His camera uses film — imagine that! — and he has a darkroom in his home where he does his own film-development, a hobby I used to do with my dad in my teenage years.  Cassette tapes are how Decker listens to music, and there were only three Star Wars movies at that time, which you watched on videocassette.

 

    Events build to Reverend Weeb’s three-pronged money-making scheme described above.  The ending is exciting, albeit not particularly twisty, and both the good guys and the bad guys get their just desserts.  One loose end remains, and I doubt it is resolved in the next book: what will happen to Queenie?!

 

Excerpts...

    “Hey, Rage, where you at?”

    “In a motel outside New Orleans.”

    “Hmmm, sounds romantic.”

    “Very,” Decker said.  “My roommate is a 240-pound homicidal hermit.  For dinner he’s fixing me a dead fox he scraped off the highway near Ponchatoula, and after that we’re taking a leaky tin boat out on a windy lake to spy on some semi-retarded fishermen.  Don’t you wish you were here?”

    “I could fly in tomorrow, get a hotel in the Quarter.”

    “Don’t be a tease, Catherine.”  (pg. 119)

 

    “We’re here for the bass tournament.”

    “Is that right?”  Weeb eyed the rowboat disdainfully.  “Sorry, son, but this event’s not open to the general public.”

    Al Garcia said, “We’re not the general public, son.  We’re the Tile Brothers.”  Coolly he handed Charlie Weeb the receipt for the registration fee.  Weeb passed it to Deacon Johnson.

    “It’s them, all right,” Deacon Johnson reported.  “Boat number fifty, all paid up.”

    “You don’t look like brothers,” Reverend Weeb said accusingly.

    “Si, es verdad,” Jim Tile said.

    “Fo sho,” added Al Garcia.  “We true be bros.”  (pg. 268)

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.4*/5, based on 4,881 ratings and 588 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.94*/5, based on 18,429 ratings and 1,120 reviews.

 

“Just one of those days … when you feel like the spit-valve on the trombone of life.”  (pg. 314)

    If you’ve never read any of Carl Hiaasen’s books. Be aware that they generally never skimp on cusswords.  I found 28 in the first 10% of this book, which is about normal.  Racial epithets also are used, and adult situations and nudity occur on a regular basis.

 

    There were only a couple of typos, mind/mine and Scaggs/Skaggs) which still surprised me since I was reading the mass-market paperback version, published by Warner Books.  But since Scaggs was as in “Ricky Scaggs”, I’m wondering if it was a deliberate error to avoid copyright issues.

 

    Also, if you’re of the Pentecostal persuasion, you probably won’t like this book.  And if you’re a dog-lover, you should probably skip it as well.

 

    I enjoyed Double Whammy.  There were no slow spots and there was enough spoofery, wit, and outrageous events (such as the culinary delights of eating roadkill) to keep me turning the pages.  This book would make a great airport or beach read.

 

    8 Stars.  I read Double Whammy during 2023 Banned Book Week (October 1-7), which turned out to be a timely effort since Wikipedia notes that in 2017 the Texas Department of Corrections put this on its list of books that inmates in its state prisons were not allowed to read.  Neither Carl Hiaasen nor I have any idea what the reasoning for this act was.  No policemen are killed in Double Whammy, and in fact, the actions of the two main cops here, Jim Tile and Al Garcia, are quite commendable.