Stormy Weather - Carl Hiaasen

   1995; 384 pages.  Book 3 (out of 7) in the “Skink” series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Crime–Humor; Florida Crime-Noir; Beach Novel; Satire.  Overall Rating: 8½*/10.

 

    It’s probably not a good idea to book a week’s vacation in Florida during hurricane season.  But that’s what honeymooners Max and Bonnie Lamb did.

 

    And sure enough, a killer hurricane—the weatherman called it the nastiest one in years—just ripped through the Miami area, wreaking havoc on everything in its path.  That’s okay though, since Bonnie and Max are staying at Disney World, a couple hundred miles north of all the destruction.

 

    Now Max has a romantic idea: let’s drive down to Miami and videotape the aftermath of the storm’s fury.  We’ll concentrate on house trailers.  If we’re lucky we might even film some dead bodies.  Maybe we can sell the footage to CNN.

 

    Besides, the storm is no longer in the area.  What possible harm can come of this?

 

What’s To Like...

    Stormy Weather is the third book in Carl Hiaasen’s Florida noir “Skink” series.  Skink is hands down my favorite Carl Hiaasen character; he’s a former governor of Florida who suddenly quit one day and disappeared into the swamps and marshes.  But he's still alive and well, a fact he trusts with only a very few companions.

 

    Several people in Stormy Weather get killed in addition to the hurricane victims, but this is not a whodunit.   The reader witnesses who the perpetrators are, and the fun is guessing which ones will pay for their misdeeds, and which ones will get away.  You might be surprised by some of those outcomes.

 

    A bunch of storylines are quickly introduced, staffed by a bunch of quirky characters.  Carl Hiaasen then jumbles up both plots and people, and mirthful mayhem ensues.  In the hands of a lesser author this might get tedious and confusing, by Hiaasen handles it deftly.  A couple of budding romances also pop up, but this doesn’t overshadow the book’s main genre: humorous Florida crime-fiction.

 

    The ending has a couple of neat twists, and does a good job of tying up all the story threads.  True love wins out, Skink disappears back into the hinterlands, and after the requisite insurance claims have been filed, repairs commence on homes and house trailers.  Owners can rest assured that their domiciles are now “hurricane-proof”.

    Yeah, sure.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Plangently (adv.) : in a loud, reverberating, and melancholy way.

Others: Spavined (adj.).

 

Excerpts...

    “She tried to cut out my kidneys one night in the shower.”

    “That’s the scar on your back?  The Y.”

    “At least she wasn’t a urologist.”  He closed the book and picked up the channel changer for the television.

    Bonnie said, “You cheated on her.”

    “Nope, but she thought I did.  She also thought the bathtub was full of centipedes, Cuban spies were spiking her lemonade, and Richard Nixon was working the night shift at the Farm Store on Bird Road.”

    “Drug problem?”

    “Evidently.”  (pg. 91)

 

    He lifted her chin.  “This is not a well person.  This is a man who put a shock collar on your husband, a man who gets high off frog slime.  He’s done things you don’t want to know about, probably even killed people/”

    “At least he believes in something.”

    “Good Lord, Bonnie.”

    “Then why are you here?  If he’s so dangerous, if he’s so crazy—”

    “Who said he was crazy.”  (pg. 224)

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.4*/5, based on 3,109 ratings and 418 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.97*/5, based on 18,108 ratings and 1,078 reviews.

 

“The world doesn’t stop for a hurricane.”  “No, (…) but it wobbles.”  (pg. 68)

    The text of Stormy Weather is rife with profanity.  I counted 43 instances in the first 10% of the book, which extrapolates out to a gazillion or so.  There are also a number of references to “adult situations” and some racial pejoratives.

 

    But that’s just par for the course for a Carl Hiaasen novel.  This is my ninth novel by him, and I really like his storytelling and writing style.  The plotlines are complex, yet not confusing.  The action is fast-paced.  The satire is witty.  Best of all are the author’s perspectives on the business activities in his native state, warts and all.  And let’s face it, Florida being battered by hurricanes is an annual occurrence.  You can view that as a chronic drawback, but enterprising souls will see it as opportunities get rich quick via what some people might call scams and rip-offs.

 

    8½ Stars.  Here’s a Spanglish phrase that cropped up in the story: “Sale del carro con los manos arriba!”  Look up its translation.  It may come in handy someday.

You Are Doomed (Sign Here Please) - Andrew Stanek

   2016; 245 pages.  New Author? : No.  Full Title: You Are Doomed (Sign Here Please): The Legally Required Third Installment.  Book 3 (out of 7) in the “You Are Dead” series.  Genres : Humorous Fantasy; Absurdism.  Overall Rating : 7*/10.

 

    Fresh from a successful parrying of the evil plans of the Afterlife bureaucrats, Nathan Haynes is moving on from his hometown of Dead Donkey, Nevada.  He’s boarded a bus, eager for adventure, and is headed to Las Vegas.  But he needs to watch out for Afterworld hitmen, who may even be on the bus already, disguised as fellow passengers.  After all, Nathan has been murdered eight times over the last couple days.

 

    Let’s see now.  The bus driver is a big, burly sour-tempered guy, so that seems normal.  To Nathan’s right, a little boy and girl are engrossed in video games.  Behind him, two old ladies are knitting together.  Actually one is knitting while the other one unknits her efforts.  There’s also a crazy man in a poncho who says he’s a serial killer.  And a wild-eyed fisherman who keeps saying “storm’s a-comin’ ”.  There's also a lumberjack carrying a huge axe.  Nearby are an engineer and a philosopher, who can, and do, argue about life, the universe, and everything else.  Finally, there’s an economist who can, and will, tell you why anything that happens is bad for the stock market.

 

    All in all, just a bunch of normal people heading to Las Vegas on a bus.  Nathan’s got nothing to worry about, right?

 

What’s To Like...

    You Are Doomed (Sign Here Please) is the third book in Andrew Stanek’s You Are Dead series, and takes place immediately after the events in Book 2, You Are a Ghost (Sign Here Please), which is reviewed here.

 

    The plotline structure is pretty much the same as in the previous two books.  The bureaucratic executives of the Afterworld, Director Fulcher and Overdirector Powell, once again try to trap Nathan into signing the infamous Form 21B.  Killing Nathan (Book 1) didn’t persuade him to sign; neither did turning him into a ghost (Book 2).  This time they use a “Doom” curse on him.

 

    Once again, the strengths of the storyline are the witty dialogue, Nathan’s unflappably optimistic outlook on life, and Andrew Stanek’s keen insights into all sorts of topics, among which are the necessity of committees, memorandums, and the filling out forms to do anything in the universe.

 

    I liked that the author is also not afraid to render opinions on hot topics, such as anti-vaxxers, nuclear stockpiles, global warming.  The friction between Particularly Cynical Atheists the Slightly Less Cynical Atheists, and the American Society of Skeptics had me chuckling out loud.  Being a chemist, I liked the musings on the bureaucracy exhibited by Hydrogen atoms.  Ditto for the use of physics (Newton’s Third Law of Doom) to counter Nathan’s curse.

 

    The ending is fittingly ridiculous, with a plethora of convenient circumstances and bureaucratic loopholes all leading to Nathan yet again avoiding signing off on Form 21B.  This is not a criticism since the book’s tone is unashamedly Absurdist.  Gregor Samsa of Franz Kafka’s The Metamorphosis would totally empathize with Nathan's situation.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.2/5 based on 401 ratings and 45 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.06/5 based on 212 ratings and 14 reviews

 

Excerpts...

    “But Director,” he said, wringing his hands helplessly, “if your superior catches me trying to steal from her, she’ll turn my skull into a cane!  I should explain that Overdirector Powell turns the skulls of her enemies–“

    “Yes, I know that already,” Fulcher said, cutting off one of Ian’s lengthy tirades before it started.  “But she’ll also turn our heads into skulls if we fail to get Haynes’ file in order, and for that we need the backdating device.  You, Ian, are my most loyal subordinate–“

    “No I’m not,” Ian said, terrified.

    “Alright, then.  Allow me to rephrase.  You, Ian, are my most expendable subordinate.”  (loc. 1008)

 

    “I heard you saying that you’d like to be a flight attendant a minute ago, and it would really mean a lot to me.”

    “Sure, I’d love to help,” Nathan said cheerily.  He stood up.  “What should I do?”

    “Well, first, you need to stop the captain from sneaking into the liquor supply.”

    “Hey, if people didn’t want me to guzzle the alcohol, they should have made drinking and driving illegal,” the pilot said.

    “They did,” Brian said, his voice now slurring as he drank down more cola.

    “More illegal, then,” the pilot said.  (loc. 3165)

 

Kindle Details…

    You Are Doomed (Sign Here Please) sells for $0.99 at Amazon right now, the same price as all the other books in the series.  Andrew Stanek has several more fantasy series for you, and just recently published a non-fiction biography of his father.  All his e-books are priced at $0.99, and occasionally discounted to free.

 

“Have you found anything to indicate there might be any positive economic impacts from the bus falling off the cliff?”  “Yes.”  (loc. 3395)

    The profanity in You Are Doomed (Sign Here Please) is pleasantly sparse, which was true for the first two books in the series as well.  I noted just seven cusswords in the whole book, most of them “hell”.

 

    There were a few typos, such as effect/affect, payed/paid, filed/filled, but not enough to be distracting.  The (presumably) erroneous reference to Overdirector Fulcher, which occurred twice, did make my reading mind stumble a bit, though, as I don’t think he was promoted.

 

   My biggest quibble was with the thin plot.  Nathan is tasked with finding a way to counter the Doom curse, and then carrying it out.  This turns into a “needle in a haystack” challenge, which he overcomes without even seriously impacting his journey to Las Vegas.  Yes, this is forgivable since this is an Absurdist tale, but still, the book would be even better if there was a more engaging plotline.

 

    Nonetheless, I enjoyed YAD(SHP).  Its wit and musings override the plotline quibbles, and kept me entertained from beginning to end.  It is an ideal beach- or airport-read, fast-paced, yet manages somehow to be both thought-provoking and humorous.

 

    7 Stars.  One last thing.  At one point a transportation device called a Suborbital Rocket-Powered Unicycle is utilized.  I need to get me one of those!

The Collected What If? - Robert Cowley

    2001; 827 pages.  New Authors? : Yes.  Full Title: The Collected What If?  Eminent Historians Imagine What Might Have Been.  Edited by Robert Cowley.  Genres : Essays; World History; Speculative History; Non-Fiction.  Overall Rating : 9½*/10.

 

    I remember the first Alternate History book I ever read.  Its title was If the South Had Won the Civil War, and Wikipedia lists its author as MacKinlay Kantor and that it was first published in 1961.  The book was short, there were some neat pictures in it, and I still recall a lot of the plot details.

 

    I’m guessing it was a Weekly Reader offering, meaning the target audience was Juveniles.  It sparked a lifelong love of the Alt History genre in me; I still read the genre quite frequently.

 

    Which means Robert Cowley’s opus, The Collected What If, was a personal must-read.  Forty-five essays, penned by all sorts of historians, each one examining a pivotal point in history and speculating as to what would happen if things went differently.

 

    Me reading it was a match made in Alternate History heaven, and the three alternate timeline scenarios for the Civil War brought back fond YA reading memories.

 

What’s To Like...

    The Collected What If is a compilation of two of Robert Cowley’s collections of “counterfactual” essays that contains 20 (plus 14 sidebars) and 25 entries (no sidebars) respectively.  The entries are arranged chronologically in both volumes.  Volume One was strictly military what-ifs; Volume 2’s contents were broadened to include some non-military topics, such as what the USA would’ve been like if Richard Nixon, Lyndon Johnson, and John F. Kennedy had never made it to the White House.

 

    Despite the titular “What If” motif, there is a lot of factual history covered here.  That’s logical, since you can’t discuss alternatives until you’ve presented what really occurred.  In fact, a majority of the essays spend much more time on the actual historical events than on what might have been.  The introduction also points out that the book’s content deliberately avoids “frivolous counterfactuals”.  Musing about what Hannibal could have done if he had an H-Bomb, or Napoleon with a stealth bomber, is just plain silly.  The counterfactual has to be plausible.

 

    Personally, I found the actual history accounts just as fascinating as the counterfactuals.  The British could have easily won the Revolutionary War, and Lincoln’s famous Emancipation Proclamation was more a clever political ploy than a great moral step forward.  My favorite essays were mostly those that dealt with ancient history (such as what if the Persian armies had won the Battle of Salamis), but that’s probably a reflection of my personal tastes of reading history books.

 

    The essays are replete with trivial tidbits.  I learned that the concepts of “freedom” and “citizen” did not exist until the Greeks came along.  The etymology of the word “slave” was interesting, and there’s a good reason why George Washington never wrote any memoirs.  It was neat to see two of my heroes, Vercingetorix and Wilfred Owen, getting some ink, and the eerie circumstances and timing around the 1948 deaths of Lawrence Duggan and Harry Dexter White makes me wonder what really goes on in the higher echelons of American national security.

 

    There are some helpful counterfactual maps and illustrations scattered throughout the book.  The longest essay was 34 pages long; the shortest was a mere 9 pages.  Each essay has a catchy title and subtitle to go with it.  For example: “Napoleon’s Invasion of North America: Aedes aegypti takes a holiday”, which should whet the literary appetite of any alt-history reader.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.4/5 based on 76 ratings and 35 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.82/5 based on 603 ratings and 77 reviews.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Diapason (n.) : a grand swelling burst of harmony.

Others: Auto da-fe (n.); Legerdemain (n.); Irrupted (v.).

 

Excerpts...

    Only eleven [German U-boats] were delivered in 1914.  But (. . .) attrition remained very low, since the Royal Navy had little in the way of defenses.

    The initial English efforts against the submarine bordered on the laughable.  Picketboats armed with blacksmiths’ hammers were sent out to smash periscopes; attempts were made to catch submarines with nets like cod; sea lions were even trained to seek out unwanted submerged intruders—none of which met more than the slightest degree of success.  (pg. 602)

 

    But for the potato, what different roads history might have taken?  Would Spain have become such a vast Imperial power, presiding over the first empire in history on which the sun never set?  (Its wealth would be rooted in a mound of silver mined by potato-fed conscript laborers.)  Would Frederick the Great’s Prussia have survived without the potato in the Seven Years’ War (1756-63), paving the way, ultimately, for the ascension of Germany?  . . .  How many crises of the Cold War, one wonders, were fueled by potato-based vodka?  And would we now, in a rare interval of relative peace, be appreciating van Gogh’s first major, and truly memorable, painting, The Potato Eaters?  (pg. 813)

 

Pascal suggested (in his Pensées) that if Cleopatra had been born with a somewhat larger nose, Mark Antony would have defeated Octavian at Actium.  (pg. 429)

    Unsurprisingly, profanity is sparse in The Collected What If; I spotted just ten instances in the entire 827 pages; and those were mostly in direct quotes of historical figures.  One of those was an f-bomb.

 

    There also were a few typos, such as: cause/caused; want/wont; lead/led; and the bizarre enchiphered/enciphered.  How spellchecker missed that last one mystifies me.

 

    Some readers were understandably disappointed in the factual/counterfactual ratio.  That didn’t bother me, but I love reading about history, no matter whether it's actual or speculative.  Also, keep in mind this is an 827-page, full-sized, hardcover book; reading it will be a significant investment of time.  It took me a full month to get through it.

 

    For me, The Collected What If was a great history read, both the real and the imagined parts.  As memorable as MacKinlay Kantor’s book was, it was neat to see what a bunch of historians can do to make the genre a reading delight for adult audiences as well.

 

    9½ Stars.  We would be remiss if we didn’t mention the final entry in the book, and the only one that violated the chronological order system: “What if Pizarro had not found potatoes in Peru: The humble roots of history”.  The second excerpt above, is from it.  It borders of being whimsical, but was actually food for thought.  Pun intended.

Saturday The Rabbi Went Hungry - Harry Kemelman

   1966; 270 pages.  Book 2 (out of 12) in the “Rabbi Small Mystery” series.  New Author? : No.  Genre : Crime Mystery; Jewish Literature;  Amateur Sleuths.  Overall Rating : 7*/10.

 

    Poor Isaac Hirsh.  He had a good job and a beautiful wife.  But he was a recovering alcoholic, and one night he fell off the wagon.

 

    While almost everyone else in the predominantly Jewish neighborhood of Barnard’s Crossing was observing Yom Kippur, Isaac went drinking and driving.  Then he came home, parked his car in the garage, closed the garage door, and passed out in the driver’s seat with the engine still running.  That's where the police found his body.

 

    Was it an accidental death or was it suicide?  That may seem like a trivial issue to most people, but it makes a big difference to the life insurance company that covers Isaac’s policy.  It also impacts where Isaac, a non-practicing Jew, can be buried.  Suicide’s a sin, and no sinners are allowed in a Jewish cemetery.  It’s up to Rabbi Small to figure this all out and render a judgment.

 

    Hmm, suicide or accident.  Which was it?  What if it’s neither?

 

What’s To Like...

    Saturday The Rabbi Went Hungry is the second book in Harry Kemelman’s Rabbi  Small cozy-mystery series.  I read the first book in the series, Friday The Rabbi Slept Late; it is reviewed here.

 

    Once again, the story blends a noteworthy amount of Jewish theology with the investigations by various parties, including the police, Rabbi Small, the life insurance claims agent.  Temple politics play a significant part in the Rabbi getting involved.  God moves in mysterious ways.  Harry Kemelman makes use of a lot of Hebrew vocabulary in the text, but that’s not a problem in the Kindle version since highlighting the word or phrase brings up the English definition. 

 

    There are lots of characters to meet and be suspicious of, and lots of red herrings to throw both the reader and the Rabbi off-track in the investigation.  The insights into Jewish theology and how it differs from Christian thinking was also enlightening.  The story opens with the Rabbi leading a Yom Kippur service, which I gather is the most important Holy day of the year in Judaism.

 

    The book was published in 1966, during the height of the American Civil Rights movement.  Rabbi Small gets invited to take part in that movement, and I was surprised when he gave his reasons for declining to do so.  I winced the half dozen or so times the word “negro” was used, having to remind myself that in the 60s it was the politically correct word to use.

 

    The ending is okay by 1960s crime-mystery standards, but pretty blah by today’s.  The key clue is noticed by the Rabbi, but not revealed to the reader.  Rabbi Small only divulges it when he makes his accusation.  Bottom line: don’t try to solve this before the Rabbi does.  Just tag along and enjoy his interactions with the many possible suspects.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.3/5 based on 1,549 ratings and 153 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.91/5 based on 2,775 ratings and 256 reviews.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Jocose (adj.) : playful or humorous.

Others: Escheat (v.).

 

Excerpts...

    “I was good to him; I took care of him like a mother."

    “And yet he drank.”

    “That started before I met him.  And I’m not sorry,” she added defiantly, “because that’s how I met him.”

    “So?”

    “He had holed up at this little hotel where I was working on the cigar counter in the lobby.  If he hadn’t been on a bender, how could the likes of me have met a man like him?”

    “And you feel you got the best of the bargain?”

    “It was the best kind of bargain there is, Rabbi, where both parties feel they’ve got the best of it.”  (loc. 4804)

 

    “Well, when a man drives into his garage, turns off the headlights, closes the garage door behind him, and then is found dead of carbon monoxide poisoning there’s always a question.”

    “Suicide?”

    “Isaac Hirsh took out an insurance policy of twenty-five thousand dollars less than a year ago.  There’s a two-year suicide clause on all our policies and double indemnity for accidental death.  If his death was an accident, the company forks out fifty thousand dollars.  If it was suicide, we don’t pay a red cent.  The company feels that fifty thousand dollars is worth a little investigation.”  (loc. 5088)

 

Kindle Details…

    Saturday The Rabbi Went Hungry is priced at $6.99 at Amazon right now.  The other books in the series are in the $1.99-$8.99 range, in no apparent pattern.  Alternatively, there is a bundle containing the first four books of the series, for $17.99, which is the format I’m using.

 

In a small town there are no secrets; a secret is not something unknown, only something not talked about openly.  (loc. 6515)

    There’s no blood, gore, or “adult situations” in Saturday The Rabbi Went Hungry, and I noted only five cusswords in the first 50% of the book.   The raciest thing I could come up with was a single use of a slang term to describe parts of the female anatomy.

 

    All the other quibbles have been covered.  If differences in religious practices and beliefs don’t interest you, then you’ll find the pacing slow.  If the word "negro” makes you wince, just be thankful the other “n-word” wasn’t used.  If you like trying to solve the mystery alongside the protagonist, concentrate instead on using logic to eliminate various characters from the sizable list of suspects.

 

    I’m still getting used to the tone and structure of this series.  The theological exegesis are interesting to me.  I felt the storyline is more character-driven than whodunit-driven is a bit disappointing, but I still enjoyed watching the amateur sleuth Rabbi Small go about his investigation.  We’ll see if I keep that attitude through the remaining two books in the bundle.

 

    7 Stars.  There is a father-son duo that pop up frequently in the storyline.  Their last name is Goralsky, and the son’s name in Ben.  For some reason, the name of the father is withheld for about 95% of the tale.  A key clue?  A freaky background story?  Who knows.  Just before the end of the book, his name is finally disclosed: he's Moses.  Now I’m more mystified than ever.

The Rabbit Factor - Antti Tuomainen

   2019; 324 pages.  New Author? : Yes.  Book 1 (out of 3) in the “Rabbit Factor” series.  Genre : Nordic Noir; Finland; Suspense; Dark Humor.  Overall Rating : 8*/10.

 

    Henri Koskinen has been having a tough time lately.  He’s just been fired (well, requested to resign, technically) from his actuarial job, despite his stellar number-crunching performance.  The reason: his boss felt Henri wasn’t a team player.  Oh well, so what.  There’s lots of other places that will hire him.

 

    Apparently not.  After a week of job hunting, Henri is still unemployed and the bills need paying.  And then, some good news and some bad news arrive.

 

    The bad news is that Henri’s brother, Juhani, has passed away.  That’s sad, but in truth Henri and Juhani weren’t all that close.  The good news is that Juhani has bequeathed his earthly assets to Henri.  Actually, just a single asset.  It’s not a bunch of money; it’s an adventure park called YouMeFun.  Henri is now its owner.

 

    That’s not exactly the sort of job Henri is trained for, but at least it’ll pay the bills.  Hmm, maybe not.  The accounting books indicate Juhani has borrowed heavily to keep the park open, and now Henri is responsible for those debts.

 

    And he’s going to be astounded at the interest rate on those loans.

 

What’s To Like...

    Some sites call the genre of The Rabbit Factor “Nordic Noir”, and I kinda like that choice.  There are killings, but this is not a murder-mystery.  “Suspense” is also a good description, then throw in a bit of Romance, and sprinkle some lighthearted Wit throughout.  Overall, the book’s tone reminded me of Die Hard 1, if you remember that old movie.

 

    I loved that the protagonist is an actuary.  Henri tackles all his challenges analytically and mathematically.  Sometimes this works to his detriment, much like Sheldon’s cogitations on The Big Bang Theory.  Gradually, Henri starts to broaden his thought processes, thanks both to an appreciation of Monet’s paintings (that happened to me as well!), and a girl who addles his brain whenever he’s near her. 

 

    The book’s original language is Finnish, and was translated into English by David Hackston.  I think he did a superb job; just keep in mind we’re talking about “Across-the-Pond English”, and not “American”.  So Yanks will run into some weird spellings (storeys, yoghurt, whingeing), and odd phrases (zebra crossings, nappies, humming and hawing) along the way.  I loved that my favorite British expression, “and Bob’s your uncle”, shows up here, although I wonder what the original Finnish expression was.

 

    I chuckled when Scrooge McDuck was mentioned.  Are Disney characters popular in Finland?  The book’s title stems from a giant metal rabbit sign at the park that impacts the storyline.  The park features all sorts of rides/attractions that will appeal to young and old alike.  Each one comes with a catchy name, such as Komodo Locomotive, Crazy Coil, Banana Mirror, Trombone Cannons, and Furious Flingshot.  Again, I’m in awe of the wordplay here, and wonder what they were called in the original Finnish.

 

    The ending is good, and includes a couple of plot twists that explain how the park can be entertaining lots of customers and still be heavily in debt.  Henri’s life is on the upswing, as is YouMeFun, and there's a promise of more adventures involving both in the next book in the series, The Moose Paradox.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Jaffa (n.) : a popular carbonated drink made in Finland.

Others: Chicane (n.).

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.4*/5, based on 1,928 ratings and 105 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.79*/5, based on 4,451 ratings and 635 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    “I just realized I haven’t asked what you do for a living.”

    Laura’s words brought me back to the office.

    “I am an actuary,” I said.  “Well, I gave my notice two weeks ago.”

    “Because of YouMeFun?”

    I shook my head.  “I didn’t know about this park at the time.  I resigned because I couldn’t stand watching my workplace turn into a playground.   Then I inherited one.”  (pg. 47)

 

    “Can you embrace the gift of your team’s unique emotional success story?”

    “What?”

    “It’s an essential part of working life these days,” I say and, disconcertingly, I can almost hear Perttila’s voice.  “Your strength might lie in an area where a weaker person might become swept away.  That makes you a safe emotional harbour.  When strength and weakness combine, a collective synergy emerges from within both, creating successful, empathetic prosperity.”

    I can see Kristian doesn’t understand a word I’m saying.  There’s nothing to understand.  Even I don’t know what I’m talking about.  (pg. 133)

 

Kindle Details…

    The Rabbit Factor currently sells for $6.15 at Amazon.  The other two books in the series, The Moose Paradox and The Beaver Theory, are the same price.  Antti Tuomainen has English translations of at least four other standalone novels for you, ranging in price from $0.99 to $9.99.

 

The most successful people are those who talk the least sense and blame everybody else for it.  (pg. 255)

    There isn't a lot of foul language in The Rabbit Factor.  I noted just eight instances in the first third of the book, although the favorite one was the f-bomb.  Later on, there are at least three occasions involving “intimate relations”, so you probably don’t want little Timmy or Susie reading this book.

 

    The quibbles are minor.  Henri’s actuarial musings piqued my interest at first, but after a while, I just wanted him to loosen up and chill.  It also takes him an irritatingly long time to figure out he might be falling in love.

 

    But these are superficial gripes.  The Rabbit Factor was my introduction to Antti Tuomainen’s works, and his storytelling, character development, and clever wit kept me turning the pages.  I look forward to reading more of his books.

 

    8 Stars.  One of Henri’s pet peeves is when people call YouMeFun an Adventure Park instead of an Amusement Park.  He feels forced to explain to several people why those are not synonymous terms.  But you know the difference, right?  If not, see the comments.

The Day of the Triffids - John Wyndham

   1951; 241 pages.  New Author? : Yes.  Book 1 (out of 2) in the “Triffids” series.  Genre : Classic Sci-Fi; Post-Apocalyptic Fiction; Movie Tie-In.  Overall Rating : 8*/10.

 

    It was a global double whammy.

 

    The first shock was the coming of a new plant species called the triffids.  Some think they came from outer space, but the evidence points to modified seeds of Russian origin.

 

    The triffids are dangerous: they can shuffle around and possess a lethal ten-foot-long stinger.  But triffid oil is a highly prized commodity, much superior to traditional fish oil, so "triffid farms quickly sprang up.  And since triffids had no eyes, the threat they posed to humans was minor.

 

    Then came the second shock.  The earth’s orbit passed through the tail of a comet, and people worldwide were treated to an astral light show, the likes of which had never been seen before.  There was just one drawback: the next morning, every human who had watched the cosmic event was totally blind.  Suddenly triffids and humans couldn’t see each other.

 

    But the triffids had already adapted to that.

 

What’s To Like...

    The Day of the Triffids is a 1951 post-apocalyptic sci-fi novel by John Wyndham.  It was made into a movie 12 years later, which was my introduction to it (black & white version, probably seen on TV), and it scared the bejeezus out of me.

 

    The story is set in the greater London area (John Wyndham is a British author), and we follow our protagonist, Bill Masen, as he tries to come to grips with a world where nearly everyone has been blinded and are desperately trying to survive on a limited food supply, no services (such as phones and electricity), and marauding triffids.  Bill is one of the few lucky humans that can still see; he was recovering from eye surgery on the night of the comet, and missed the light show because his eyes were wrapped up with gauze.

 

    The storyline is basically an examination of how humans would react when they are suddenly threatened with complete annihilation.  Different people respond in different ways.  The majority adopt a “me first” attitude: grab as much food and supplies as you can; and who cares if others starve because of this.  Others counter with a “share and share alike” philosophy; but the trouble with this is that it might mean that everyone just starves to death a little bit sooner.  Some discern “God’s judgment” in what has transpired, and establish religious communes.  And a few decide that “might makes right” applies and are happy to kill anyone who disagrees; less mouths to feed means more food for the those who remain alive.  All of these approaches reminded me of the old saying “Every society is three meals away from chaos.”

 

    The e-book is written in English, not American, which means you get a few weird spellings, such as eying, caldrons, whisky, and payed; but I didn’t find this distracting.  I chortled at the “triffidian amatory exuberance” euphemism, but had to ponder the “enforced polygamy” dictum, a practice whose justification is given in one of the excerpts below.  The Christian commune at Tynsham Manor is an interesting study, and kudos to Wyndham for mentioning the city of Staines: I’ve been there!

 

    The ending is okay, but somewhat contrived.  Bill and company are visited by a helicopter from a group of survivors one day, then desperately need them when visited by a less-friendly group 24 hours later.  This creates a situation that can either be viewed as a cliffhanger (a pet peeve of mine), or a teaser for a sequel, but Wyndham never penned one.  The follow-up book finally appeared 50 years later; it was titled The Night of the Triffids and written by Simon Clark.  Better late than never.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Spizzard (n.) : someone who is intoxicated by drugs or alcohol.

Others: Contretemps (n.); Derniers Cris (n., pl.); Cointreau (n.); Shindy (n.); Cenobite (n.);

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.4*/5, based on 5,884 ratings and 756 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.01*/5, based on 109,345 ratings and 5,287 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    “Look at it this way.  Granted that they do have intelligence then that would leave us with one important superiority—sight.  We can see, and they can’t.  Take away our vision, and the superiority is gone.  Worse than that—our position becomes inferior to theirs, because they are adapted to a sightless existence and we are not.”  (loc. 627)

 

    “There is one thing to be made quite clear to you before you decide to join our community.  It is that those of us who start on this task will all have our parts to play.  The men must work—the women must have babies.  Unless you can agree to that, there can be no place for you in our community.

    After an interval of dead silence, he added:

    “We can afford to support a limited number of women who cannot see, because they will have babies who can see.  We cannot afford to support men who cannot see.  In our new world, then, babies become very much more important than husbands.”  (loc. 1668)

 

Kindle Details…

    The Day of the Triffids presently goes for $4.99 at Amazon.  The sequel will run you $8.99.  Amazon carries another eight books or so by John Wyndham, ranging in price for $3.50 to $12.99.

 

And we danced, on the brink of an unknown future, to an echo of a vanished past.  (loc. 1755)

    As would be expected of a 1951 sci-fi novel, the language is very clean.  I noted just six cusswords in the first 25% of the book, all mild entries in the eschatological category.

 

    It should be noted that the 1963 movie adaptation probably sets a record for diverging from the book’s storyline.  The film is an action-horror tale where the triffid invasion is settled on a soggy lighthouse floor.  There’s no such invasion in the book, which is more of a study of human survival in a post-apocalyptic world.  Wyndham would’ve been turning over in his grave if he saw the movie.

 

    The shortcomings if the book’s ending have already been addressed, but the literary bar for a science fiction novel in the early 1950s was set rather low, and The Day of the Triffids easily meets my expectation in that regard.  Plus, there’s a short epilogue on the final page that lets you know how things turn out for Bill, Josella, and Susan.  (Huh? Who?)

 

    8 Stars.  So which is better: the thriller-horror movie or the contemplative book?  I’ll duck that issue by saying both have their merits, and it depends on your mood at the time.  But I do want to find and watch the movie version and see if it still scares me.