Sprout Mask Replica - Robert Rankin

    1997; 350 pages. Book 1 in the “Completely Barking Mad Trilogy” series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Humorous Absurdism; British Humour; Weird Fantasy.  Overall Rating : 7½*/10.

 

    The butterfly effect is a famous component of Chaos Theory.  In a nutshell, it states that when a butterfly flaps its wings in Brazil, it in turn may be the cause of a tornado in Texas.

 

    The butterfly doesn’t realize this, of course, but it is intriguing to contemplate a small change in a system resulting in significant and unpredictable consequences down the line.

 

    But what if the inverse was also true?  A tornado forms in Texas, a butterfly in Brazil senses it, and instinctively flaps its wings to cancel out the disturbance.  Let's call him "the compensator”.

 

    Our protagonist here is such a compensator.  He has a pretty neat gift, eh?  Well, maybe not.

 

    Because what happens if/when the butterfly stops flapping its wings?

 

What’s To Like...

    Sprout Mask Replica is written mostly (but not completely) in the first-person POV.  The narrator’s name is not given, but he goes by many monikers, including “The Chosen One”, “The Compensator”, the “Mystical Butterfly of Chaos”, and “Dog Breath”.  Since one of his relatives is “Uncle Brian Rankin”, we may logically assume this is Robert Rankin writing his autobiography.

 

    The book is written in English, not American, so us Yankee readers will get weird spellings, such as plough and jewellery; as well as odd phrases, such as “bit of a kip”, “soldier of toast”, and the nifty word “niffy”, which is defined below.

 

    A number of Robert Rankin’s recurring characters are featured here, which you’d expect in his autobiography, including Fangio, Neville, Jim Pooley, John Omally, and the inscrutable “lady in a straw hat”.  And I think this is where Barry the Holy Guardian Sprout is introduced, who becomes a major recurring character.  A portion of his background is given in one of the excerpts below.

 

    In between (most) chapters, Robert Rankin includes some poetry, which I found to be quite entertaining.  I enjoyed sitting in on the “All Brentford Open Lying Contest”, chuckled at the mangled French, and was happy to see my favorite type of word puzzle, “acrostics”, get a brief mention.  The author’s music references are impressive, one of which, The Sonic Energy Authority, may set some sort of record for “most obscure” band ever.

 

    The ending is both witty and enigmatic, which is the norm for a Robert Rankin opus.  The Chosen One finishes his book and heads out for a swim.  A spaceship departs, but I have a feeling we haven't seen the last of it.  All historical paradoxes are repaired.

    Or are they?

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Niffy (adj.) : having an unpleasant smell (British slang)

Others: Sporran (n.); Micturating (v.).

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.3/5 based on 118 ratings and 30 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.70/5 based on 848 ratings and 21 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    In those days I had a lot of time for Fangio, although thinking back I can’t recall why.  Certainly the guy was fair, he never spoke well of anyone.  And when it came to clothes, he had the most impeccable bad taste I’ve ever encountered.  He suffered from delusions of adequacy and his conversation was enlivened by the occasional brilliant flash of silence.

    Once seen, never remembered, that was Fangio.  Many put this down to his shortness of stature, for as Noel Coward observed, “Never trust a man with short legs, brain’s too near their bottoms.”  (loc. 970)

 

    “I was supposed to be on the job.  Your Holy Guardian.”

    “He’ll forgive you, you’re one of his angels, after all.”

    “Well.”

    “Well what?”

    “Well, I never said anything about being an angel.”

    “You said you’re my Holy Guardian.  That’s an angel, isn’t it?”

    “Well, it can be.  For some people.  But there’s an awful lot of people on Earth.  More people than there are angels, in fact.  Look upon me as your little gift from God’s garden.”

    “What?”

    “I’m your Holy Guardian Sprout.”  (loc. 2483)

 

Kindle Details…

    Sprout Mask Replica currently costs $6.99 at Amazon.  Robert Rankin offers another 3 dozen or so “weird fantasy” e-books, generally in the price range of $2.99-$7.99, plus an autobiographical I, Robert, which costs $9.00.

 

“Run and waggle, chief, run and waggle.”  (loc. 3337)

    There’s very little profanity in Sprout Mask Replica; I counted just six “damns” in the first 50% of the novel.  Insertions of other cusswords are “cleaned up” via appropriately placed asterisks (example: sh*t).  A number of “adult situations” are alluded to, but there’s nothing lurid.

 

    Typos are rare: one gum/gym booboo and a couple of comma misuses.  The title reference occurs at 93% Kindle, although I’m still not sure what it signifies.

 

    Don’t even try to find a plotline for the first 20% of the book; there’s none there.  Fortunately, Robert Rankin still keeps you entertained with his wit, anecdotal asides, and wry British humour.  The plotline does show up later on.

 

    Veteran Robert Rankin readers will find Sprout Mask Replica satisfying, but if you’re never read any of his novels, don’t make this your introduction to him.  The Amazon blurb says this is the first book in the “Completely Barking Mad” trilogy; but I don’t think it’s necessary to read the books in order.  Robert Rankin is loose with the concept of “trilogy”—one of his contains only two books; another contains eight books.

 

    7½ Stars.  One last thing, a nice tidbit of the abundant wit in the story.  “My brother’s favourite number was 300.  Because if you turn 300 on its side it looks a bit like a bum pooing.”  It's true! Once you see it, you can’t unsee it.

Reaper Man - Terry Pratchett

   1991; 353 pages.  New Author? : No.  Book 11 (out of 41) in the “Discworld” series; Book 2 (out of 5) in the “Death” sub-series.  Laurels: 126^th in The Big Read (the top 200 books all-time in the UK).  Genres: Satire; Humorous Fantasy.  Overall Rating : 9½*/10.

 

    You know him.  The Grim Reaper.  Death personified.  Black robe, black hood, nasty-looking scythe.  He’s been around forever.  You don't want to meet up with him.  They say death and taxes are the only two sure things in life.

 

    But maybe the only certainty is taxes.  Because somehow, DEATH has just been forcibly retired.  Apparently his superiors, whoever they may be, are alarmed about his recent behavior.  Lately, DEATH has started to contemplate things.  Existential stuff.  Life and whatnot.  He’s developed a personality.  That interferes with his job performance.  Plus there have been other irregularities.  It’s time to replace him someone less irregular.  A new Grim Reaper.

 

    So see ya later, DEATH.  Time to ship you out to pasture.  Have fun finding out how other species – such as mortals – live out their brief lives.  Good luck on finding another job somewhere.

 

    Like on Discworld.

 

What’s To Like...

    Reaper Man is another fantastic novel in Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series, which placed fourteen of its books in the “Top 200” of something called The Big Read, a survey carried out in 2003 by the BBC to determine the best-loved novel of all time.  Reaper Man finished at #126, and is a brilliant blend of satire, humor, and keen insight into the deeper subject of our mortality.

 

    As usual, there are a bunch of storylines to follow.  DEATH does indeed find a job on Discworld, as a hired hand on a farm, where his ability to swing a scythe is a significant asset.  We also follow the afterlife misadventures of the wizard Windle Poons, who was so looking forward to experiencing reincarnation and investigate the mysterious proliferation of snow globes and shopping baskets. Then there are all those rocks and other inanimate objects that suddenly fly up from the ground and float in the air. Add in some pesky cusswords that breed, and you have just the right amount of plotlines to keep you turning the pages.

 

    Windle Poons and DEATH are the main protagonists, and this may be the story that introduces a character called The Death of Rats, and his lesser-known “mini-me” cohort, The Death of Fleas.  The wizards of the Unseen University play a major role here, which means lots of witty dialogue and plenty of magical bumbling.  I was also happy to see my favorite Discworld being, The Librarian, have a sizable role.  Oook!

 

    It was fun to watch DEATH experience his first hangover, and enlightening to learn how One-Man-Bucket got his name.  I liked Mrs. Cake, a true clairvoyant, but who can only “see” ten seconds into the future.  The talking mayflies were neat, albeit short-lived, and things like hemogoblins, anti-crimes, and autocondimentors just added to the zaniness.  Now if I could only get someone to teach me how to do the “Morris dance”.

 

    The ending was poignant, thought-provoking, and left a bit of a lump in my throat, which is rare for a Discworld tale.  All the major plotlines are tied up, although some of the secondary ones carry over into further installments.  Once again there are lots of hilarious footnotes and zero chapter divisions, which is the norm for Discworld books.  Reaper Man is both a standalone novel and part of a 41-book series.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Apposite (adj.): apt in the circumstance, or in relation to something.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.7*/5, based on 2,151 ratings.

    Goodreads: 4.24*/5, based on 92,504 ratings and 2,997 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    Something wonderful, if you took the long view, was about to happen.

    If you took the short or medium view, something horrible was about to happen.

    It’s like the difference between seeing a beautiful new star in the winter sky and actually being close to the supernova.  It’s the difference between the beauty of morning dew on a cobweb and actually being a fly.  (pg. 35)

 

    The wizards said that, as followers of the light of wisdom, they owed allegiance to no mortal man.

    The Patrician said that this may well be true but they owed a city tax of two hundred dollars per head per annum, payable quarterly.

    The wizards said that the University stood on magical ground and was therefore exempt from taxation and anyway you couldn’t put a tax on knowledge.

    The Patrician said you could.  It was two hundred dollars per capita; if per capita was a problem, de-capita could be arranged.

    The wizards said that the University had never paid taxes to the civil authority.

    The Patrician said he was not proposing to remain civil for long.  (pg. 82)

 

“Tell someone you’re dead and they look at you as if they’ve seen a ghost.”  (pg. 125)

    Finding something to quibble about in a Discworld novel is always a tough task, but here goes.

 

    There’s a small amount of cussing in Reaper Man (only 8 instances in the first half of the book), and even then it’s limited to the milder epithets, including the cleverly polytheistic adjective: “godsdamn”.

 

    There are a couple of literary plugs for Terry Pratchett’s book The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents, which is amazingly prescient, since it came out in 2001, ten years after Reaper Man was published.  But I read the HarperTorch edition, which came out in 2002, and I suspect they made the sly insertions.

 

    Finally, there were a couple of typos, which is rare for a published book: on/an, anymore/any more, and a weird “Δ60” notation on page 122.  I’m guessing that’s some sort of esoteric shorthand in publishing lingo.

 

    So much for nitpicking.  IMHO, Reaper Man is one of the top books in Terry Pratchett's superlative Discworld series, and is comedic fantasy at its finest.  I highly recommend it, and the entire series for that matter, to any and all.

 

    9½ Stars.  One last note.  There is a bit of a love story in Reaper Man, which is a rare occurrence in a Discworld novel.  It was partly responsible for the lump in my throat at the end of the book, and demonstrates just how versatile of a writer Terry Pratchett was.

Mort - Terry Pratchett

    1987; 243 pages.  New Author? : Heavens, no.  Book #4 (out of 41) in the Discworld series.  Book #1 (out of 5) in the “Death” sub-series.  Genre : Humorous Fantasy; Satire.  Laurels : #65 in the 2003 British reading survey, “The Big Read”.  Overall Rating : 8½*/10.

    Everyone needs to take some time off once in a while.  Kick off the shoes, put aside the scythe, and just forget about the stresses of the job.  This is true, even if you’re Death.

    Of course, you also need to have someone fill in for you while you’re away, especially if you’re Death.  It just won’t do to have the whole living/dying process put on hold. Time would grind to a halt, things would get crowded been should-be-dead critters, and there’s no telling what sort of Temporal Paradoxes would be spawned in the Multiverse. 

    But who can substitute for Death?  It’s not a profession that has a huge pool of practitioners, and it certainly wouldn’t do to have some amateur mucking around, screwing up the job.  It seems like there’s only one option available for Death.

    Head out to the next job fair and hire an apprentice.

What’s To Like...

    The three main story threads in Mort are a.) Mort learning on his own how to be Death’s  replacement (he gets zero on-the-job training), b.) Death’s R&R follies, and c.) the efforts to repair Mort’s first big career mistake.

    Death’s antics, as he tries to understand what it means to be a human, are especially entertaining.  He applies for a job, goes fly-fishing, gets drunk, dances, and gambles, all in order to learn the meaning of “fun”.  You’ll be amazed at what the first job he finally lands is.

    I always enjoy it when Multiverses show up in a story, and Terry Pratchett finds a unique  and imaginative way to handle the Temporal Paradox that Mort inadvertently creates here.  I chuckled at the Caroc Cards and the Ching Aling of the Hublandish, both fortune-telling devices, as well as Octarine, the magical eighth color of the spectrum.

    The wizards at the Unseen University get a lot of ink, and that’s a plus.  I don’t recall meeting any dwarves, trolls, elves, or guards from the Night Watch, but there is a gargoyle and a princess.  Plus the Librarian makes an appearance (ook!!), with Rincewind serving as his assistant.

    As with all Discworld novels, Mort is both a standalone story as well as part of a series.  There are a couple cusswords, but they’re few and far between.  You won’t miss much if you don’t read the Discworld books in their proper order.  As (almost) always, Terry Pratchett abstains from using chapter divisions, and sprinkles a fair amount of footnotes throughout the pages.  You don’t want to skip over those.  There are even “footnotes to footnotes”, which is something I don’t recall encountering before.

Kewlest New Word...

Calcareous (adj.) : chalky; containing Calcium Carbonate

Others :  Brassica (n.); Declamatory (adj.); Actinic (adj.); Bollard (n.).

Excerpts...

    Reannuals are plants that grow backwards in time.  You sow the seed this year and they grow last year.

    Mort’s family specialized in distilling the wine from reannual grapes.  They were very powerful and much sought after by fortune tellers, since of course they enabled them to see the future.  The only snag was  that you got the hangover the morning before, and had to drink a lot to get over it.  (pg. 2)

    The Disc’s greatest lovers were undoubtedly Mellius and Gretelina, whose pure, passionate and soul-searing affair would have scorched the pages of History if they had not, because of some unexplained quirk of fate, been born two hundred years apart on different continents.  However, the gods took pity on them and turned him into an ironing board (when you’re a god, you don’t have to have reasons) and her into a small brass bollard.  (pg. 110)

“You drunk I’m think, don’t you?”  (pg. 150)

        The overarching theme of Mort is, of course, Death.  Even the title is a nod to this, since besides being short for the protagonist’s name, Mortimer, it’s the French word  for “death”.  Terry Pratchett’s thoughts on the subject here are both heartwarming and whimsical, yet theywere also sobering to me, since he’s no longer with us.

    I thought the ending, which is primarily the resolution of the Temporal Paradox, was quite clever, although some nit-picky readers  might deem it a bit “convenient”.

    In summary, Mort is one of the top-tier Discworld novels, highly entertaining, well-focused, and as good of a place as any to start reading this series.

    8½ Stars.  It should be mentioned that Mort ranked #65 in the 2003 Great Britain reading survey called “The Big Read”.  Five Discworld books claimed spots in the Top 100 places, and fifteen in the Top 200, which is absolutely phenomenal.  You can read more about The Big Read here.

Men At Arms - Terry Pratchett

   1993; 377 pages.  Book 15 (out of 41) of the Discworld series.  Book #2 (out of 8) of the City Watch subseries.  New Author? : No.  Genre : Comedic Fantasy.  Laurels : #148 in the Big Read.  Overall Rating : 9½*/10.

    Sam Vimes is getting ready to retire from the Night Watch.  It’s a good career move since he plans to marry the Lady Sibyl Ramkin, who is merely the richest woman in all Ankh-Morpork.  Sam will be moving up in social status, and up in money.

    There is one little thing that Sam would like to clear up before he retires.  It seems a lot of people (and we use that term loosely) are dropping dead in Ankh-Morpork lately.  That in itself is not unusual, but the means of their demise is.  Lead poisoning.

    But not just any kind of lead.  Lead in the form of little pellets.  And which seem to make big holes in a victim’s body when they enter it at great speeds.  Whatever weapon was used, it is new to Sam Vimes and his Night Watch.  What kind of contrivance could wreak such damage?

   Maybe the word “gonne” found on a stray piece of paper is a clue.  Maybe there’s a clue on the book’s cover.

What’s To Like...

    Men At Arms centers around Ankh-Morpork’s Night Watch, and that’s always guarantee of a fun read.  Three significant new recruits are added here – Lance-Constables Detritus, Cuddy, and Angua, and all play major parts in the storyline.  This is the book where the Night Watch takes over prominence from the Day Watch.  It was also nice to see Gaspode The Talking Dog again; he is an infrequent guest in the series.

     The main plotline is of course figuring out who is behind the killing, and why, and how.  But there are also lots of subplots.  Sam retires, gets married, and gets promoted.  Carrot finds his heritage, loses it, and gets promoted.  Gaspode gets a home, and leaves a home.  As always, Terry Pratchett subtly weaves several more-serious themes into the tale.  Here they are Affirmative Action, Racial/Species Bigotry, the role of Royalty, and Gun Control, with that last topic being given a different spin than what you’d expect.

    Men At Arms has the usual Pratchett format – no chapters, but lots of witty footnotes.  If you like dogs and clowns and dwarfs and trolls, you’re in for a treat.  Synesthesia makes a brief appearance, and even my Gnostics get some ink, which is an incredible work-in when you think about it.  And if you’ve never attended a clown funeral, you don’t know what you’re missing, and here’s your chance.

    I don’t recall any other Discworld novel featuring so many Ankh-Morpork guilds.  To wit: the Assassins’ Guild, the Fools’ Guild (the clowns), the Alchemists’ Guild, the Beggars’ Guild, the Thieves’ Guild, the Butchers’ Guild, the Teacher’s Guild, the Bakers’ Guild.  Hey, there’s even a Dogs’ Guild.

    I thought the ending was excellent and tied things up nicely.  As always, this is a standalone novel, despite being part of a 41-book series.  It’s nice not to have to read them in order, and it’s nice to discover where some characters made their debut.

Kewlest New Word. . .

Berk (n.) : a fool; a twit  (Britishism)

Others : Toff (n.; Britishism); Stroppy (adj.; Britishism).

Excerpts...

    “I’ll tell you,” said Vimes.  “A monarch’s an absolute ruler, right?  The head honcho-“

    “Unless he’s a queen,” said Carrot.

    Vimes glared at him, and then nodded.

    “OK, or the head honchette-“

    “No, that’d only apply if she was a young woman.  Queens tend to be older.  She’d have to be a … a honcharina?  No, that’s for very young princesses.  No.  Um.  A honchesa, I think.”

   Vimes paused.  There’s something in the air in this city, he thought.  If the Creator said, “Let there be light” in Ankh-Morpork, he’d have got no further because of all the people saying “What color?” (pg. 64)

    “I think we’re going to have to go and have a word with the Day Watch about the arrest of Coalface,” Carrot said.

    “We ain’t got no weapons,” said Colon.

    “I’m certain Coalface has nothing to do with the murder of Hammerhock,” said Carrot.  “We are armed with the truth.  What can harm us if we are armed with the truth?”

    “Well, a crossbow bolt can, e.g., go right through your eye and out the back of your head,” said Sergeant Colon.  (pg. 244)

 Sometimes it’s better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness.  (pg. 253)

    I have nothing negative to say about Men At Arms, but there are a couple things to note.

    First, there are quite a number of killings.  Someone getting offed is not unprecedented for a Discworld novel, but I counted eight of them here.  That's a bunch.  The good news is that means DEATH gets to show up a lot.  But it also means impressionable young’uns might be a bit stunned by it all.

    Second, there is one case of “jumping into the sack”, and I don’t remember encountering that in a Discworld novel before.  Yes, it is tastefully done, but adult readers will have no doubt about what took place.  And little Tommy or Susie might ask questions.

    But hey, I’m not a juvenile, so none of this bothers or offends me.  It was enlightening to see how Terry Pratchett handled both the multiple murders and the sex in a manner acceptable even to YA readers.

    9½ Stars.  Published in 1993, Men At Arms is from the “Golden Age” of Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series.  It completely lived up to my high expectations, and I enjoyed it from beginning to end.

Small Gods - Terry Pratchett

   1992; 344 pages.  Book 13 (out of 41)  in Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series.  New Author? : No.  Genre : Fantasy; Humor; Satire.  Overall Rating : 10*/10.

    It must be Brutha’s lucky day.  Om, the patron god of his hometown Omnia has designated him, a mere novice, to be his “Chosen One”.

    Unfortunately, Om has fallen on hard times lately, and for the last three years he’s been stuck in a most humiliating manifestation – a turtle.  Still, he is a god, and one of the miraculous things he can do as a turtle is speak to his Chosen One.

    For Brutha, this is a mixed blessing.  On one hand, it’s kind of nice to be able to chat with a deity, even if the god-given advice  is rather worthless.  On the other hand, being the only one who can hear Om, Brutha looks like a crazy man when he’s speaking to the turtle.  And others notice this kind of eccentricity

   Such as Deacon Vorbis, who speaks for Om, even though he’s never ever spoken with Om.  And Deacon Vorbis also happens to be the head of the Inquisitors, which means he has ways of seeing what’s inside your head.

    Such as drills, and tongs, and fire, and other extremely uncomfortable implements.

What’s To Like...

    Small Gods is kind of a one-off tale in the Discworld Universe.  The only “regulars” we meet are DEATH,  the librarian (who only makes a cameo appearance), and Cut-Me-Own-Hand-Off Dhblah, a take-off of the ubiquitous Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler.  But not to worry, the new characters are fun to meet, including a host of philosophers, religious figures, and gods.  My favorite was St. Ungulant, an anchorite who dwells way out in the desert, although the eagle is pretty kewl too.

    The “small gods” concept is explained early (page 6), and is basically this: a god has power(s) proportional to the number of his followers, and what those believers are.  So being god over a bunch of humans is much better than being one over a bunch of bacteria.  And when your following dwindles to, say, zero, you cease to exist.  Om is down to his last believer, and so is relegated to being a turtle.

    Small Gods is Terry Pratchett at his finest.  There are footnotes, but no chapters.  The wit and silliness abound.  And yet he tackles a sensitive subject in the form of organized religion, and handles it evenly and subtly enough to where I don’t think anyone would take offense.  Structurally, the storyline is perfect, with everything building to a great, twisty ending.  There’s even an unusual (for Discworld tales) epilogue, wherein we learn the rest of Brutha’s story.

    Balanced against the serious themes of torture and war in the name of a god, Pratchett gives us some interesting views on things like the art of Philosophy, the worth of libraries, and the assets and liabilities of learning to think for yourself.  We even get the “creation story” behind Discworld (page 25), which was quite the treat.

    As usual, there are lots of smaller details to enjoy.  My favorite religion, Gnosticism, gets a brief mention.  So does eidetic memory and the shadowy History Monks.  Small Gods is an easy and fun read, which is no small feat when addressing topics such as the Inquisition.

Kewlest New Word. . .

Soughing (v.) : making a moaning, whistling or rushing sound (such as the wind in the trees)

Others : Baulks (n., plural); Anchorite (n.); Sophistry (n.)

Excerpts...

    “If you’re really Om, stop being a tortoise.”

    “I told you.  I can’t.  You think I haven’t tried?  Three years!  Most of that time I thought I was a tortoise.”

    “Then perhaps you were.  Maybe you’re just a tortoise who thinks he’s a god.”

    “Nah.  Don’t try philosophy again.  Start thinking like that and you end up thinking maybe you’re just a butterfly dreaming it’s a whelk or something.”  (pg. 101)

    “I’m reminded of the time when old Prince Lasgere of Tsort asked me how he could become learned, especially since he hadn’t got any time for this reading business.  I said to him, ‘There is no royal road to learning, sire’ and he said to me, ‘Bloody well build one or I shall have your legs chopped off.  Use as many slaves as you like. ‘  A refreshingly direct approach, I always thought.  Not a man to mince words.  People, yes.  But not words.”

    “Why didn’t he chop your legs off?” said Urn.

    “I built him his road.  More or less.”

    “How?  I thought that was just a metaphor.”

    “You’re learning, Urn.”  (pg. 208)

 The trouble with being a god is that you’ve got no one to pray to.  (pg. 11)

    Small Gods has been on my TBR shelf for a number of years now.  I’m not sure why it’s taken me so long to get around to reading it – I knew going in it was often considered Terry Pratchett’s best effort from his most creative era.

    I don’t have anything negative to say about the book, and I was impressed by how evenly the author, an avowed humanist, handled the whole touchy subject of religion.  So go out and find the book, and treat yourself to a fascinating tale, and remember the mantra: “The Turtle Moves”.

    10 Stars.  When you can’t find anything at all to quibble about, what other rating can you give?

Myth-Fits - Jody Lynn Nye

   2016; 305 pages.  Book #21 (out of 21) of the “Mythadventures” series.  New Author? : No, but the first one where she’s not just a co-author.  Genre : Fantasy; Humor; Dimension-Travel.  Overall Rating : 7½*/10.

    Business has been a bit slow lately at Myth Inc.  Some of that is due to the competition undercutting their prices – Myth Inc. is the best at recovering priceless artifacts, and generally they only take the top-dollar cases.  They still have a healthy amount of money in reserve.

    So when a man named Looie approaches them to find something for him in an alternate dimension, and wants a price-break to boot; they turn him down.  Even when the head of Myth Inc., Bunny, wants them to take the job.

    But when they find out just where Looie’s artifact is located – in Winslow- attitudes change.  Winslow is the most luxurious vacation spot in the dimension, and it prides itself on never saying “no” to any request from any of its customers.

    What’s wrong with combining business with pleasure?

What’s To Like...

   Myth-Fits is the 21^st, and latest, entry into (the late) Robert Asprin’s Myth Adventures series, and I espied it in my local library’s “Recent Additions” section the last time we were there.  I recently read another one of the later entries (reviewed here), and was rather disappointed.  I am happy to say this one does a much better job of catching the initial spark in the series.

    I liked the choices of the Myth Inc. characters here.  It was good to see Aahz get some major ink, as well as my favorite MacGuffin, Gleep, tagging along.  The rest of Skeeve’s crew: Tananda, Bunny, Chumley, and Markie, all lend their unique slants to the story, and happily, my three least-favorite characters, Guido, Nunzio, and Uncle Bruce, get either scant or zero attention.

    Winslow was a neat new dimension to explore, a whole city dedicated to providing for you as if you were on a cruise or lounging around at Club Med.  There are four main plotlines: (1) find the Loving Cup; (2) find out why the lines of magic at Winslow are so hard to draw power from; (3) figure out who the “other magician” is that evidently is also searching for the Loving Cup; and (4) get Bunny to tell why she's suddenly so worried about the business's bottom line.

    As usual, the story is told from a first-person POV (Skeeve’s); and as usual, there are witty pseudo-quotes to start each chapter.  I enjoyed going on the scavenger hunt with Skeeve and Company, and it’s always neat to come across that delightful British phrase “and Bob’s yer uncle!”

    There is a decent, slightly twisty, stutter-step ending.  As always this is a standalone novel, as well as part of a series.  It does help if you’ve read the initial book though, just to understand the Aahz/Skeeve relationship.  There’s a bevy of various beasties vacationing on Winslow, a couple of way-kewl artifacts to search for, lots of magic, and plenty of Asprin-inspired wit.

Kewlest New Word. . .

Fleering (v.) : laughing imprudently or jeeringly.

Others : Dirndl (n.); Ambit (n.);

Excerpts...

    “(She) must be looking for the Loving Cup, too.”

    “Why do you say that?” I asked.  She could have been looking for anything!”

    “Occam’s razor, kid,” Aahz said, wearily.

    “Was he a barber?” I asked.  (pg. 52)

    “They threw me out of the Central Help Desk!”

    “Why?”

    “No reason!”

    “No reason?” she asked, with a little smile.  “You managed to provoke Winslovaks into making you leave the courtesy desk instead of letting you do what you want?  Jeopardizing their dimension-wide reputation for never saying no to any request?”

    Aahz pursed his lips until he managed to squirt the words out.

    “I was just trying to push them a little.  The sooner we get that cup back, the sooner we can get out of here.”

     “And by push you mean bully, cajole, and harass the staff and probably everyone who was waiting in line. Maybe even random passersby who were minding their own business?”

    “. . . Maybe.”  (pg. 182)

 “Stop trying to make me have fun!”  (pg. 190)

    The quibbles are minor.  For a fantasy series that is rooted in the concept of dimension-travel, we don’t travel to a lot of places in Myth-Fits.  There are three: Myth Inc’s headquarters in the bazaar on Deva, Winslow, and a brief-but-perilous detour to a dimension called Maire.  Still, both Maire and Winslow are new places for the reader, and they’re the setting for at least 90% of the book.

    Some of the plays on words are overused and get tiring very fast; in particular the Pervect/Pervert witticism.  There are some footnotes, but they’re just cheap plugs for earlier books in the series.  Terry Pratchett’s Discworld footnotes have me spoiled, I guess.

    But these pesky things are minor.  Myth-Fits is a fun, fast, easy read, and it was a pleasure to discover that this series has regained some of its pizzazz.

    7½ Stars.  Some authorship data, gleaned from Wikipedia.  Myth-Fits is Book 21.  The first 12 books were penned by Robert Asprin alone, and the next 7 were co-authored by him and Jody Lynn Nye.  Only the last two (Books 20 and 21) are attributed solely to Ms. Nye.

    It was therefore a happy surprise to read this latest work, and find it to be the equal of the earliest works in the series, which happen to be my favorites.  My two-cent opinion is that Jody Lynn Nye has basically saved this series from the dustbin, similar to the fine job Brandon Sanderson did for Robert Jordan’s Wheel of Time series after the latter passed away.

    Bravo, Ms. Nye!  May you be inspired to write many more adventures for Skeeve and Aahz.

Monster - A. Lee Martinez

   2009; 295 pages.  New Author? : Yes.  Genre : Fantasy; Humor.  Overall Rating : 8*/10.

    Question: What’s a yeti doing in the walk-in freezer at the Food Plus Mart?

    Answer: Anything it wants, but mostly devouring everything in sight, especially the Choc-O-Chiptastic Fudge ice cream.  Well, not quite everything.  It doesn’t seem to like the vanilla.

    For Judy Hines, this is an annoyance, since the beast’s appetite is going to seriously slow down her nightshift chore – to restock the frozen food section.  So, who ya gonna call?

    Wrong, you call Animal Control Services.  Who don’t do yetis, but surprisingly, don’t treat Judy’s call as if it were a prank.  Instead, she gets transferred to some department called Cryptobiological Containment and Rescue Services.  And they say they’ll send a guy right over to take care of things.  Should be there in 15 minutes to so.

    Just one guy, eh?  I can’t wait to see how he deals with a huge, insatiably-hungry, mean-tempered yeti.

What’s To Like...

    The storyline in Monster will remind you of Ghostbusters and/or Men In Black, except that instead of ectoplasmic entities or an interstellar witness relocation program, we’re dealing with infestations of mystical and mythical beasts.  A Lee Martinez throws all sorts of them into the story, so if you’re a critter-lover (I am, and actually, they’re called “parahumans”), you’re in for a treat.

    The title refers to one of our two protagonists – an ordinary chap nicknamed “Monster” – who teams up reluctantly and temporarily with Judy in exchange for her driving him to his parahuman-purging jobs when his van gets trashed.  The secondary characters are well-developed.  Monster’s girlfriend is a demon with a penchant for cussing, but due to her hellish nature, her nasty words are ones like “blessed”, “”Elyisan”, and “sacrosanct”.  Monster’s cohort is a being from the 6^th dimension who specializes in shape-shifting origami.  You may not think a paper butterfly is much of an opponent, but just try swatting one.

    I liked the attention to the world-building details.  Things like a “misfortune hex” (a minor, pesky curse), memory glyphs, and a part of our brain called “Merlin’s lobe” which tends to inhibit the belief in magic and fantasy in most adults.  This means that when our mind has to deal with, say, yetis in the freezer, it quickly adjusts our memories of the incident once it’s over to explain things in more realistic terms.  A yeti, you say?  Nah, I think it was just a big raccoon.  Or something like that.

    There is some cussing and sex in the book, but I thought it fit in well.  We learn that humans are divided into “Cognizants”, “Light Cognizants”, and “Full Incogs” (think 'Muggles) when it comes to being able to remember the unexplainable.  And that angels are real.  And easy.

    Monster is a standalone novel, and a quick, fun, easy read.  I picked the hardcover version up at my local library, but I note that they also carry it, and three other books by this author, as free-to-borrow e-books.

Excerpts...

    “So you’re married, then?”

    “In a manner.  My true nature is hard to explain in terms you could understand.”

    “Because I’m a monkey,” said Judy.

    “I never said that.”

    “But you were thinking it.”

    “I don’t judge,” said Chester.  “I rather like you lower entities.  You’ve done quite well for transient globs of possibly sentient protoplasm.”

    “Possibly sentient?”

    “The jury is still out.”  (pg. 90)

    “If you’d handled Judy with more delicacy …”

    “Karma, huh.”

    “Karma is just a philosophical construct, a rather simplistic punishment/reward theory that satisfies your egocentric perception of your universe.”

    “I was just about to say that.”

    “You can dismiss my observation with levity –“

    “I just did.”  (pg. 174)

 “My girlfriend is a demon … but I don’t really like her.”  (pg. 141)

    Don’t let the title fool you: this is a witty and humorous book first, and a fantasy tale second.  There is a significant “Christopher Moore” feel to the dialogue and storyline, so if you like that author, you’ll enjoy Monster.

    My only quibble, and it’s minor, is the ending.  The plotline builds steadily to the requisite cosmos-saving final fight, but it seemed straightforward to me.  There were hijinks and mishaps along the way, but no major twists.

    But in fairness, the epilogue – which is actually the final chapter – did hold a nifty surprise for me, and makes me wonder if there is some sort of sequel to Monster either in the works, or that already exists.

    8 Stars.  Listen, if you’re going to emulate someone like Christopher Moore, you’d better do a good job of it, or else the critics at Amazon will eat you alive.  IMNSHO, A. Lee Martinez pulls it off quite nicely.