Dead and Gone - Charlaine Harris

   2009; 261 pages.  Book 9 (out of 13) in the “Sookie Stackhouse” series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Paranormal Mystery; Gothic Romance; Vampires; Werewolves.  Overall Rating : 7*/10.

 

    It was a major coming-out event.  Almost as big as when human beings found out there were lots of Vampires living in their midst.  This time both humans and vamps discovered they had Wereanimals (werewolves, werefoxes, and others) living in their neighborhoods and keeping a low profile.

 

    Reactions were mixed.  Some humans accepted their new furry neighbors without any qualms.  Others were less thrilled.  Some homo sapiens were downright hostile.

 

    So when a local werepanther was killed in a very gruesome fashion in Bon Temps, Louisiana, local resident Sookie Stackhouse wants to know if this was a hate crime.  Because she too has some paranormal genes in her that she’s been very careful to keep secret.

 

    She’s half-human and half-fairy.

 

What’s To Like...

    Dead and Gone, is the ninth book in Charlaine Harris’s Sookie Stackhouse series.  In the previous tome, From Dead to Worse, Sookie meets her great-grandfather Niall, a fairy from another dimension (the fae live a long time), now that relationship gets developed more fully.

 

    The storyline structure utilizes the usual formula.  Charlaine Harris opens things by getting us caught up on the status of a slew of characters via the coming-out being broadcast at Merlotte’s Bar.  After the savage murder grabs our attention, the plotline splits into several other threads.  Her boss, Sam Merlotte, has to deal with a family tragedy; Sookie’s great-grandfather is involved in fairy kingdom unrest, and several personal relationships are impacted by the wereanimals’ coming-out.

 

    That sounds like a recipe for literary confusion, but Charlaine Harris makes sure that things unfold smoothly.  The story is once again told in the first-person point-of-view, Sookie’s, which means the reader gets to hear her thoughts about things such as unintentionally killing someone, being duped into a betrothal, and how to cope with reading other peoples’ minds since she’s a telepath.  Introspection abounds.

 

    The ending is tense, exciting, and bittersweet.  Both the good guys and bad guys suffer some casualties.  Still others live to fright another day, but not all the survivors live happily ever after.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.6/5 based on 4,882 ratings and 1,144 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.02/5 based on 193,898 ratings and 4,955 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    “Lock the doors and don’t let anyone in.”

    “Doors are locked; no one’s knocking,” she said.

    “Don’t let me in,” I said, “unless I give you the password.”

    “Sure, Sookie,” she said, and I could tell she thought I’d gone over the edge.  “What’s the password?”

    “Fairypants,” I said, and how I came up with that I have no idea.  It simply seemed super unlikely that anyone else in the world would say it.

    “I got it,” Amelia said.  “Fairypants.”  (pg. 223)

 

    Dr. Ludwig takes care of the cases who can’t go to the regular human hospital because the staff would flee screaming at the sight of them or the lab wouldn’t be able to analyze their blood.  I could see Dr. Ludwig’s coarse brown hair as she walked around the bed to the door.  Dr. Ludwig had a deep voice.  I suspected she was a hobbit—not really, but she sure did look like one.  Though she wore shoes, right?  I spent some moments trying to remember if I’d ever caught a glimpse of Dr. Ludwig’s feet.  (pg. 234)

 

Kindle Details…

    Dead and Gone currently costs $6.99 at Amazon.  The rest of the e-books in the series are all in the $3.99-$9.99 price range.  Charlaine Harris has several other series for your Kindle; the prices of those books are generally in the $5.99-$14.99 range.

 

 

In a rare moment of wisdom, I listened to my own advice.  (pg. 145)

    I noted eleven instances of profanity in the first 25% of Dead and Gone, which is about average for this series.  Later on, one f-bomb crops up, plus a couple of rolls-in-the-hay.

    All that introspection mentioned earlier tends to slow down the pacing.  At one point, for example, the reader is treated to a couple of pages detailing Sookie’s thoughts while weeding the garden.

 

    For me the big issue was the investigation of first killing.  To put it tersely, there is none, even with two FBI agents arriving on the scene to help out.  Despite the killing's brutality, life continues on as usual for most of the residents of the small town of Bon Temps.  Eventually, the case gets solved, but even that is due to sudden epiphanies, not shrewd detective work.

 

    If you’re reading this series for the human (and not-so-human) interrelationships involved, you probably won’t mind the way the killings are handled.  But if you’re reading them for the paranormal crime mysteries, like I am, then you may find Dead and Gone to be quite a disappointment.

 

    Overall, this was still a worthwhile read, but it doesn’t measure up to the first couple of books in the series.  It’s almost as if the author has run out of paranormal crime concepts, but still has lots of ideas about where to take the characters’ lives.  We’ll see if things get better in the next installment, Dead in the Family.  I’m not quitting this series yet.

 

    7 Stars.  One last thing.  One of my favorite recurring characters in this series, Bubba, makes an appearance in Dead and Gone.  It’s brief, but here’s hoping he gets to play a more important part in one of the remaining tales.

From Dead to Worse - Charlaine Harris

   2008; 308 pages.  Book 8 (out of 13) in the “Sookie Stackhouse” series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Paranormal Mystery; Gothic Romance; Vampires; Werewolves.  Overall Rating : 7½*/10.

 

    To say that these are turbulent times in Sookie Stackhouse’s life would be an understatement.  The Were clans (as in "Werewolf") in Bon Temps, Louisiana are engaged in a bitter struggle for supremacy and somehow Sookie is in the middle of it.  Sookie’s beau, Quinn, is a "weretiger" and is currently missing-in-action.

 

    The Vampire factions are also warring against each other, for dominance and Sookie is known to have a blood bond with one of the leaders.  One of her neighbors is a vamp, and he’s also one of her ex-lovers.  A vampire named Jonathan has been asking around about Sookie, which means he’s probably a spy for one of the factions.

 

    Sookie’s brother Jason is having marital difficulties with his werepanther wife.  Sookie’s roommate is a witch who’s in bad graces with her coven for accidentally turning a human into a pet cat.  The whole Pelt family thinks Sookie might be responsible for the killing of Debbie Pelt.  And in truth, they’re right.

 

    What’s a telepathic human to do?  Well, maybe keep showing up for work on time (a waitress at a local bar) and hope that Quinn shows up again, unharmed.

 

What’s To Like...

    From Dead to Worse is the eighth book in Charlaine Harris’s completed “Sookie Stackhouse” series.  I’ve been reading these books in order, so am a bit more than halfway through.  The book is written in the first-person POV, Sookie’s, and is a continuation of the events in the previous book, All Together Dead, which is recapped in the opening Prologue.  I much appreciated that, since it’s been a year since I read that one.

 

    There isn’t really a “main plotline” here.  Instead, the reader joins Sookie in about ten mini plot threads, including a.) who’s the withered man, b.) where’s Quinn, c.) who sent the phony cop to try and kill Eric, d.) who killed Maria-Star Cooper.  Plus about a half-dozen more.

 

    Sookie gets to meet two members of her extended family, which I thought was neat.  Early on, she meets her great-grandfather, Niall, whose fairy bloodline means he’s been living for a very long time.  At the book’s close, she meets a younger relative, whose identity we’ll refrain from giving since it would be a spoiler.

 

    The usual creatures—dead, undead, ultra-religious, and magical—are all once again present.  I liked the “ectoplasmic reconstruction” ritual, which would be quite useful.  The Thai courteous greeting known as “wai” is worked into the story and brought back fon memories.  I learned and used it on a business trip in Bangkok long ago.  I also enjoyed Charlaine Harris’s music nods: Evanescence, Dixie Chicks, Travis Tritt, and Carrie Underwood.  Those selections show good tastes.

 

    There’s no build-up to a rock-'em, sock-'em ending.  Instead, you get a bunch of “mini-endings” for each of the short plotlines.  Happily, all of those get resolved, including Bob the Cat’s dilemma.  From Dead to Worse is both a standalone novel and a part of a series.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.6/5 based on 3,511 ratings and 722 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.01/5 based on 188,428 ratings and 4,051 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    She bowed her head.  “The prince is my grandfather,” she said.

    “Oh,” I said.  “So, we’re like cousins?”

    She looked down at me, her eyes clear and dark and calm.  She didn’t look like a woman who’d just killed two wolves as quick as you could snap your fingers.  “Yes,” she said.  “I guess we are.”

    “So what do you call him?  Granddaddy?  Popsy?”

    “I call him ‘my lord.’ "

    “Oh.”  (loc. 2107)

 

    “Ah, that seems likely to result in some pretty bad things happening to Tanya,” I said.

    “Isn’t that what you want?”  Octavia looked innocent in a real sly way.

    “Well, yeah, but I don’t want her to die.  I mean, I don’t want anything she can’t get over to happen to her.  I just want her away and not coming back.”

    Amelia said, “ ‘Away and not coming back’ sounds pretty final to me.”

    It sounded that way to me, too.  “I’ll rephrase.”  (loc. 3541)

 

Kindle Details…

    Right now, From Dead to Worse sells for $7.99 at Amazon.  The rest of the books in the series are all in the $3.99-$9.99 price range.  Charlaine Harris has several other series for you in Kindle format, none of which I’ve read.  The prices of those books are in the $2.99-$14.99 range.

 

 I was practically reeking with normality by the time I got home.  (loc. 3601)

    I noted nine instances of profanity in the first 25% of From Dead to Worse, including one f-bomb.  That seemed about normal for this series.  I only caught a couple of typos: sooth/soothe and adherants/adherents.  I don’t recall any “adult situations”.

 

    After the Prologue, there’s a wedding chapter that gives updates on a bunch of characters that have little impact on the rest of the tale.  I think it’s the author’s way of introducing and giving updates for a slew of characters from the earlier books in the series, but if they don’t play a further part in the book, isn't it just wasted effort?

 

    The biggest issue has already been mentioned: the lack of an overarching storyline.  I felt like I was reading a Sookie Stackhouse anthology, and I’m not a big fan of anthologies.  Still, Charlaine Harris’s writing skills are sufficient to make it work.  But I think less-proficient writers should avoid the temptation of trying this.

 

     From Dead to Worse is a solid contribution to this series, but I wouldn't call it a top-tier entry.  Nevertheless, I enjoyed it, and look forward to the next book, Dead and Gone.  Hopefully, it will have an “everything builds to an exciting climax” storyline.

 

    7½ Stars.  Subtract 1 star if you’re not reading this series in order, particularly if you haven’t read the previous book, All Together Dead.  The backstory in the Prologue only helps if you’ve read the "back story".

All Together Dead - Charlaine Harris

   2007; 324 pages.  Book 7 (out of 13) in the “Sookie Stackhouse” series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Paranormal Romance; Mystery; Vampires.  Overall Rating : 8*/10.

 

    Sookie’s got a new job!  But don't worry, she still has her old waitressing one at Merlotte’s in Bon Temps, Louisiana.  The new one’s a moonlighting gig, literally.

 

    She’s going to a giant gathering of vampires, where a number of trials will take place, including the murder charge being brought against Sophie-Anne Leclerq, the Vampire Queen of Louisiana.  The vamps want Sookie to use her telepathic powers to “tap into” the other humans in the crowd, most of whom will be unaware of Sookie’s talent, and might be thinking important clues about the cases being tried.

 

    The work should be easy enough, but it is potentially dangerous as well.  This is a large, well-publicized meeting of the undead, and there are humans out there—most prominently, The Fellowship of the Sun—who are vehemently anti-vampire and feel called by God to kill as many of the fanged fiends as they can.

 

    Even worse, the gathering may also attract some individuals—both living and undead—who have scores to settle with Sookie personally.

 

What’s To Like...

    All Together Dead is the seventh book in Charlaine Harris’s ultra-popular paranormal series, which Amazon labels as the “Sookie Stackhouse” series, while Wikipedia prefers to call it the “Southern Vampire Mysteries” series.  I’ve been reading it in chronological order, so I’m now about halfway through.

 

    The book’s main setting is new turf for Sookie, a fictional city called Rhodes located up along Lake Michigan.  I think this is the furthest Sookie’s been away from her home state of Louisiana.  As usual, the storyline is a pleasant blend of Romance (Sookie is still mad at Bill and currently involved with Quinn), Mystery (well you expect there’ll be some murder-&-mayhem at the convention, right?), and Paranormal Fantasy (human and vampire interacting).

 

    Vampires are by far the main paranormal creatures in All Together Dead, although weretigers, werepanthers, werewolves, fairies, witches, half-demons, and Britlingen all make at least cameo appearances.  I think the Britlingen are new to the series, and I definitely hope to see more of them in the remaining tales.

 

    There were at least eight separate plotlines to follow in the book.  All but one or two of those are tied up nicely.  Charlaine Harris uses italics for the telepathic conversations between Sookie and others, which made such dialogue easy to keep track of.  Speaking of things to keep track of, there are a poopload of characters woven into the storyline.  Most of these are recurring ones, and I think the author does this deliberately to provide mini-backstories for them as an aid for readers who aren’t worrying about book-order to better understand “the bigger picture” of the series.

 

    There are plenty of thrills-&-spills which build to an action-packed climax that's somehow both uplifting and somber.  To give details would entail spoilers and we eschew them in these reviews, but suffice it to say, the pacing is rapid and there are no slow spots.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.6*/5, based on 3,375 ratings and 561 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.07*/5, based on 197,536 ratings and 3,855 reviews.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Fangbanger (n.) : a lover and blood donor of a vampire (slang, made-up).

Others: Catahoula (n.).

 

Excerpts...

    “I’m going to a wedding shower tomorrow.  Not for Jason and Crystal.  Another couple.”

    Pam had paused, her hand on the doorknob of Eric’s office.  She considered my statement, her brows drawn together.  “I am not remembering what a wedding shower is, though I’ve heard of it,” she said.  She brightened.  “They’ll get married in a bathroom?”  (loc. 107)

 

    Andre made a beeline for me.

    “I know,” he said, “that is, Sophie-Anne tells me that I have done wrong to you.  I’m not sorry, because I will do anything for her.  Others don’t mean anything to me.  But I do regret that I have not been able to refrain from causing something that distresses you.”

    If that was an apology, it was the most half-assed one I’d ever received in my life.  It left almost everything to be desired.  All I could do was say, “I hear you.”  (loc. 3600)

 

Kindle Details…

    All Together Dead is presently priced at $8.99 at Amazon.  The rest of the 13-book series range in cost from $2.99 (Book 1 only) to $8.99.  Charlaine Harris has several other series for you, none of which I’ve yet started to read.  The e-books in those range from $4.99 to $12.99.

 

“Save your drama for your mama.”  (loc. 1694)

    As always, there isn’t a lot to nitpick about in All Together Dead.  The cussing is sparse—just 7 instances in the first 20%, including one f-bomb; plus a couple of rolls-in-the-hay along the way.  If you don’t like stories told in the first-person POV, be aware that this book, and the entire series, are all told this way.

    There’s no progress on the Romance angle.  Bill, Eric, and Quinn are all candidates to be Sookie’s true love, and I don’t expect that to be resolved anytime soon.  As already mentioned, there are gazillions of characters to meet and greet, which can get tiresome occasionally, but it's all for a good cause.

 

    The biggest issue, as noted by other reviewers, is the Murder-Mystery aspect.  Sookie finds an ally who is also telepathic, and the two of them set about sleuthing all the mayhem that’s afoot.  Alas, while there’s plenty of intrigue and excitement, the “great reveals” are relegated to just being dialogue in the final chapter.  It felt rather anticlimactic.

 

    But let’s be honest, we read this series for Sookie’s witty narration, for the interspecies interactions, and to witness Sookie falling into an abundance of troubles, yet somehow squirming her way out of it.

 

    All Together Dead succeeds nicely on all those counts.

 

    8 Stars. About halfway through the book Sookie attends a gay wedding, a royal one to boot, and nobody blinks an eye.  On a larger scale, the hypothesis being presented is that, no matter what our superficial differences are (does it really matter what humanoid species we belong to?), we need to learn to accept others as they are.

    Something to contemplate as we hobnob along with Sookie and a slew of vampires.

Definitely Dead - Charlaine Harris

   2006; 324 pages.  Book 6 (out of 13) in the (completed) “Sookie Stackhouse” series.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Paranormal Mystery; Gothic Romance; Vampires.  Overall Rating : 6½*/10.

 

    It’s a sad time.  Sookie’s cousin, Hadley, is dead, a stake driven through her heart, and it now falls to Sookie to make a trip to New Orleans to clean out Hadley’s apartment.

 

    Before Hadley's demise she had a pretty high-ranking position: she was the consort to the queen of the Louisiana vampires, Sophie-Anne Leclerq, who recently married the Vampire King of Arkansas, Peter Threadgill.  Like many royal marriages, it’s an arrangement of convenience, not of love.

 

    Sophie-Anne and Hadley were close.  Extremely close.  Perhaps even embarrassingly close in the eyes of Sophie's new husband.  Particularly if a certain item, given by the King to his bride and presently rumored to be missing turns up somewhere else.

 

    So be on the lookout when you’re going through things at Hadley’s apartment, Sookie.  And be careful if you find anything that looks a bit …um… regal.  Someone may be willing to kill for it.

 

What’s To Like...

    Definitely Dead is the sixth book in Charlaine Harris’s "Sookie Stackhouse" series, which I’ve thus far been reading in order.  Vampires take center stage here, with Sookie once again reluctantly getting involved in their affairs.

 

    The shape-shifting weres (as in “werewolves”, “werepanthers”, “werefoxes”, etc.) are also around, and it was nice to also see demons, including “half-demons” and “semi-demons”, and fairies getting some ink.  I was especially delighted when a witch or four showed up, and it’s always a pleasure to have Bubba show up, even if he's just making a cameo appearance.

 

    There are plenty of plotlines to keep Sookie busy and the reader turning the pages.  Children get lost, pregnancies lead to complications, The family of the late Debbie Pelt still wants answers about her disappearance, messengers get waylaid, and all sorts of people – dead and undead – are way too interested in what’s in Hadley’s apartment.  Also the recurring theme of who Sookie should give her heart to (metaphorically, not literally) – Eric or Bill – now gets a bit more complicated with the emergence of a third suitor.

 

    I enjoyed the music nods to No Doubt, NIN, Eminem, and Usher, as well as the mention of two favorite "undead" songs: “After Midnight” (see below) and “Bad Moon Rising”.  Sookie gets a genealogical jolt late in the book that helps explain why undead males seem to always be attracted to her.  And it’s always fun to see Tarot cards being used.

 

    The ending is suitably exciting, if a bit straightforward.  Sookie saves the day and most, but not all, of the plot threads are resolved.  The book’s title is referenced a couple of times, but mostly it’s just a general caveat about declaring someone dead in a world where all sorts of undead possibilities exist.  There is some cussing, but not a lot: I counted 37 instances in the whole book, the majority of which occurred in the later chapters.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.7/5 based on 1,640 ratings and 560 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.01/5 based on 198,265 ratings and 4,148 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    “The boss wants to see you,” she said.  “I’m calling from his office.”

    Eric’s office, in the back of his club, Fangtasia, was well soundproofed.  I could barely hear KDED, the all-vampire radio station, playing in the background: Clapton’s version of “After Midnight”.

    “Well, lah-de-dah.  He’s too lofty to make his own phone calls?”

    “Yes,” Pam said.  That Pam—literal-minded was the phrase for her.  (pg. 32)

 

    Somewhere close, there was a lot of hostility and evil intent.  We left the sidewalk to cross the street to the parking lot.  I gripped Quinn’s arm and then let it go so we could clear for action.

    “Something’s wrong,” I said.

    Without replying, Quinn began scanning the area.  He unbuttoned his suit coat with his left hand so he could move without hindrance.  His fingers curled into fists.  Since he was a man with a powerful protective urge, he stepped ahead of me, in front of me.

    So of course, we were attacked from behind.  (pg. 96)

 

“You look better than a Happy Meal to a three-year-old.”  (pg. 276)

    I had a couple of quibbles with Definitely Dead, mostly with the storytelling.

 

    The book starts out slow, as we get reintroduced to all sorts of secondary characters who frankly will not play any part in the story, including The Fellowship of the Sun, a group of baddies from earlier books in the series.  Backstories are given, acquaintances are made, but unless this is your first book in this series, it's all old news and doesn't lead anywhere.

 

    The same holds true for several of the plot threads.  A little boy goes missing, Sookie’s telepathic talent saves the day.  Jason’s werepanther girlfriend has had a miscarriage and is in desperate need of medical help, Sookie comes through with the discreet, paranormal medical connections.  I kept waiting to see how both of these would later impact the main storyline, but they never did.  Frankly, after a hundred pages, I still had no idea what the main storyline was.

 

    Then there’s Hadley.  How come I can’t remember anything about her?  Well it turns out she'd never appeared in any of the previous books in the series.  She and her fatal backstory were introduced in a one-off short story titled One Word Answer, published elsewhere in a gothic anthology magazine.  Unless you happened to have also read that magazine, Hadley will blindside you.

 

    It almost felt like Charlaine Harris came up with this great idea for a plotline, then realized it was only good for 150 pages, so she padded it with all sorts of tangents and backstories to turn it into a full-length novel.

 

    6½ Stars.  Definitely Dead may be filled with filler, but it still does fine as a beach read or airport novel.  High-brow it isn’t; highly-entertaining it is.

Inspector Hobbes and the Bones - Wilkie Martin

   2017; 345 pages.  Book 4 (out of 5) in the “Unhuman” series.  New Author? : No.  Genre : Dark Humor; Paranormal Fiction; Humorous British Detective Cozy Mystery Fantasy.  Overall Rating : 7½*/10.

 

    Life is tough right now for Andy Caplet.

 

    His wife Daphne has left him.  Okay, not permanently, but to go on an archaeological expedition in Egypt.  Who knows how long she’ll be gone?

 

    But the other things are a bit more mysterious.  Some stranger walking past him just punched Andy in the nose for no discernible reason.  Then a passing car almost ran him over, and still later somebody shot him in a most sensitive area with an air rifle.  Talk about having a bad day.

 

    Maybe these things are all just a bunch of coincidences.  Maybe not.  Maybe it has to do with that less-than-glowing restaurant review Andy wrote in the newspaper that he works for.  Chefs can be hypersensitive about and criticism of their dishes.

 

    About the only good thing that happened to him so far today was a ravishing blonde named Sally who came on to him right after he was almost run over.  Sexy young women rarely do that to Andy.  True, he’s a married man now, but Daphne is far away in Egypt.  Sally has just invited him to lunch, and since nothing will come of it, so why shouldn't Andy accept?

 

    Be sure to smile for the camera, Andy.

 

What’s To Like...

    Inspector Hobbes and the Bones is the fourth book in Wilkie Martin’s “Unhuman” series, which I'm reading in order.  Daphne’s extended absence allows Andy to once again play Dr. Watson to Inspector Hobbes’s Sherlock Holmes in another paranormal whodunit full of scary not-so-humans,  charming wit, and groan-worthy puns.

 

    The plot structure will be familiar to readers of this series: we start with a simple case of who-or-what killed Skeleton Bob’s pet pig, and things quickly get more complicated and weird for our sleuthing duo.  Andy is always two steps behind Hobbes in the investigation, but in the end serves a crucial, if unwilling, part in the solving of the case.  It all may be formulaic, but I quite like the formula.

 

    Once again, I learned all sorts of British terms that somehow didn’t make it across the pond: bollocking, budging up, wellies, wotcha, holdall, snogging, doxy, a gippy tummy, a plastic wheelie bin, and lots more. Then there are the alternate spellings: pyjamas, sceptical, foetid, kerb, maths, and many others.  Who says English isn't a foreign language?

 

    I also enjoyed being immersed in English culture.  The English breakfasts are a true gustatory delight; I’ve had them a couple times while over there.  Hobbes is a Cryptic Crossword fan; so am I.  And I chuckled at the different views as to what is “recent” and what is “ancient”.  In England, something from the Middle Ages is recent history; in America anything even 100 years old is ancient.

 

    The story is told in the first-person POV, Andy’s, and is set in and around the fictional Cotswold village of Sorenchester.  There’s a nice mix of paranormal critters, some recurring, others new, and most of which are not precisely identified by unhuman type (another formulaic trait of this series).  This is a cozy mystery: there's no R-rated stuff, a minimum of violence, and only about a dozen mild cusswords in the entire book.

 

    The ending is okay, but not spectacular.  Andy, Hobbes, and Billy the Dwarf combine to save the day, although Andy (and therefore the reader) somehow misses all the excitement.  The last chapter serves as an epilogue, tying up the usual plethora of secondary plot threads, including the boar, the embarrassing photos, Mimi, and the unruly rugby players.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Bespoke (adj.) : made for a particular customer or user.

Others: Wittering (v.); Wendigo (n.); Hoik (v.); Wazzock (n.); Scrag (v.); Yomping (v., a Britishism).

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.5/5 based on 424 ratings.

    Goodreads: 4.18/5 based on 1,283 ratings and 122 reviews

 

 Excerpts...

    “Do you know anything about her?”

    “Not a great deal, dear.  She brought a lot of bother to the old fellow a few years ago.  I gather she was something of a man-eater.”

    “Do you mean she fancied him?”  I’d always struggled to believe any woman, or at least any human woman, could have the hots for Hobbes.  There was just something too feral about him.  Besides, not even his mother would have considered him good-looking, though, in fairness, there was a rough gallantry about him.

    “No.  She ate men.  Really.  Well, bits of them.  Perhaps she was more of a man-taster.”  (loc. 2316)

 

    “You may well be right about this being their accommodation.”

    “Thanks, but … umm … thinking about it again, I’m not so sure.  She, Hilda that is, was really smartly dressed, at least I think she was, and she didn’t look like she’d been sleeping in a hut.”

    Hobbes shrugged.  “If she’s what I suspect she is, she could easily appear smart to one such as you.”

    “What d’you mean ‘one such as me’?”  (loc. 3161)

 

Kindle Details…

    Inspector Hobbes and the Bones is priced at $4.99 at Amazon right now, the same as for Books 2 and 3.   Book 1 costs only $2.99, so does the newly-released fifth book, Inspector Hobbes and the Common People, which I snatched up during a much-appreciated “pre-release” special.

 

Her distrust and dislike had multiplied after I accidently hit her in the face with a dead rat.  (loc. 1044)

    I enjoyed Inspector Hobbes and the Bones, but did find some things to nitpick about.

 

    While the pacing is pleasingly brisk – Andy never seems to run out of ways to get himself in trouble – it did feel like a lot of time was spent on inconsequential tangents.  The boar investigation and Daphne’s archaeological journey both chewed up a lot of pages, but the former seemed to be nothing more than a distraction, and the latter felt like it was only there to give Andy an excuse to move in with Hobbes and Mrs. Goodfellow for a while.

 

    To boot, we really make no progress in learning exactly what sort of otherworldly creature Hobbes and some of the secondary characters are, including the main baddies.  Yes, Hobbes certainly exhibits werewolf traits.  But is he really one?  If so, how did he get that way, how many centuries old is he, and does he have a hairy, lupine Achilles’ heel?  Ditto for the creatures called “the sly ones”, the wendigos, and Stillingham stilthounds.  Inquiring minds want more details about the various beasties, even if things are revealed bit by bit, and book by book.

 

    But I pick at nits.  The emphasis in the Unhuman series is on Andy’s antics, Hobbes’s hunches, and the abundance of wit and ha-has that Wilkie Martin manages to work into each tale.  The series' target audience isn’t so much the lovers of Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes, as it is the lovers of Terry Pratchett's Rincewind.

 

    7½ Stars.  The first three e-books in this series all came out within a 12-month period in 2013-14.  Then there was a 2-year lag before this one was published.  The gap between Books 4 and 5 was even wider: 4½ years.  This makes me wonder:  has Wilkie Martin grown tired of writing this series, the way Arthur Conan Doyle grew tired of penning Sherlock Holmes tales?  Let's hope not.

Inspector Hobbes and the Gold Diggers - Wilkie Martin

   2014; 293 pages.  Book 3 (out of 4) in the “Unhuman” series.  New Author? : No.  Genre : Dark Humor; Paranormal Fiction; Humorous British Detective; Cozy Mystery.  Overall Rating : 8*/10.

 

    Someone tried to swipe all the gold in Grossman’s Bank!  Fortunately, Inspector Hobbes was quickly on the scene and saved the day by recovering the loot.  Now he’s the media’s latest hero, and every reporter in the area is parked on his front porch, wanting to interview him.

 

    Unfortunately, Inspector Hobbes is a very publicity-shy individual, and understandably so.  His past in somewhat blurry: he seems to have been around for more than a century.  And he has some rather bizarre personal habits that he’d like to keep private.  Things such as eating raw meat fresh off the bone, and running wild whenever there’s a full moon.  Shining a television spotlight on him is probably not in his best interest.

 

    So maybe it would be prudent of him to use up some vacation time, leave town, and quietly get away from it all.  Venture to someplace way out in the sticks, pitch a tent, and take up hiking as a hobby.  His buddy Andy Caplet can go with him.  I'm sure it won't be long before the media finds a new idol to chase after, and they'll forget all about Hobbes.

 

    Sounds like a plan.  About the only thing that could spoil things is if that out-of-the-way spot has some gold issues of its own.  But what are the odds of that?

 

What’s To Like...

    Inspector Hobbes and the Gold Diggers is another fine effort in Wilkie Martin’s fun paranormal “Unhuman” series.  Andy once again serves as our narrator, and plays “Watson” to Inspector Hobbes’s “Holmes”.  All of my favorite characters are back, including Featherlight Binks, Billy Shawcroft, Mrs. Goodfellow, and of course, Hobbes’s faithful pooch, “Dregs”.

 

    Once again there are a bunch of storylines to keep our heroes on their toes, including:

a.) Who tried to steal the gold the first time?

b.) Who succeeded in stealing it the second time?

c.) What happened to Mrs. Duckworth’s husband?

d.) How did Andy “lose” two days?

e.) Why does Hobbes find the ordinary-looking rocks around Blackcastle so interesting?

f.) Why is somebody trying to hurt Mrs. Duckworth?

 

    Wilkie Martin lives in the Cotswolds section of England where the series is set; thus the book is written in “English”, not “American”.  So things can be squiffy, poncey, or even manky; people say “wotcha” when meeting each other (we really need to start using that word here in the US); there are bizarrely-named things such as windscreens and wheelie bins; and you can be “turfed” out of your room, but hopefully not “nutted” by someone.  I love reading stories in a foreign language such as English.

 

    Food names are equally esoteric.  Toad-in-the-hole is explained below, but you can also chow down on chapatti, vindaloo, or hotpot, and wash it all down with a pint of scrumpy.  Apple dumplings are also on the menu, with which I'm already familiar, and they are mouth-wateringly yummy.  Andy acquires a love interest at long last, and finally learns Hobbes’s full name, and (apparently) what sort of creature he is.  I don't recall meeting Sid Sharples before but he's now one of my favorite characters.  You want him on your side in a fight even if he thinks he's a vampire.

 

    The ending is suitably exciting and twisty, with Andy being both a help and a hindrance to Hobbes’s best-laid plans.  The last couple chapters are really an epilogue, tying up some (but not all) of the plot threads, and posing some new questions which, presumably, will be addressed in Book 4, Inspector Hobbes and the Bones.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Toad-in-the-Hole (n., phrase.) : a dish consisting of sausages baked in batter.  (a Britishism)

Others: Scrumpy (n., British); Emetic (adj.); Sticklebacks (n., plural); Balaclava (n.)

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.7/5 based on 264 ratings.

    Goodreads: 4.22/5 based on 1,112 ratings and 70 reviews

 

 

Excerpts...

    “What the heck is this?”

    “Hedbury Best Bitter,” said Billy.

    “Jeez!  What’s their worst bitter like?  It’s warm and it tastes like … I don’t know what the heck it tastes like.  Is there something wrong with it?”

    I cringed, expecting Featherlight to explode at the slur.  Billy reached under the counter for the steel helmet he’d taken to wearing in times of crisis as Featherlight turned to face her.

    “She didn’t mean it,” I said.  “She’s just not used to British beer.  She’s from America.”  (loc.13726.  Note: all location numbers are from the bundle version of Books 1-3.)

 

    “The Butcher of Barnley delivered some of his best pork and leek sausages last night and the lass is making toad in the hole.”

    “Last night?”  Doesn’t he always deliver punctually in the afternoons?”

    “Normally, but he was delayed.”

    “Really?  Why?”

    “He slipped and sat on the mincer.  It meant he got a little behind in his sausage making.”  (loc. 14674)

 

Kindle Details…

    Inspector Hobbes and the Gold Diggers sells for $4.99 at Amazon right now, as do Books 2 and 4.   Book 1 goes for $2.99.  Books 1-through-3 can also be bought as a bundle for $8.09.  Wilkie Martin offers two other e-books at Amazon: Razor, a fantasy-thriller for $4.99; and Relative Disasters, a short book of “silly verse” (the author's words, not mine) for children for $2.99.

 

“Does Daddy often bring home freaks off the street?”  (loc. 12913)

    There's not much to nitpick about in Inspector Hobbes and the Gold Diggers.  As already mentioned, not all the plot threads are fully resolved, but I suspect that’s deliberate and serves as a teaser for the next book in the series.  Also, the manner in which the two "Gold Diggers" storylines are tied together seemed a bit too convenient to be believable.  Finally, although the reason for Hobbes's "strangeness" is revealed here, I for one am still skeptical about it. 

 

    But none of that matters; Inspector Hobbes and the Gold Diggers was a page-turner for me, and the things that matter most – the action, the witty dialog, the character development, and above all, the groan-inducing puns – are all here in abundance.  The pace is brisk and there are literally no slow spots in the story.  If you're in the mood for a light, funny, cozy mystery with "unhuman" critters walking around amongst blissfully unaware mortals, this book, and this series, is for you. 

 

    8 Stars.  Three books down, one to go.  My biggest fear is that this is an already-completed series.  Book 4 came out in 2016, since then Wilkie Martin hasn't published any more adventures involving Inspector Hobbes and Andy Caplet.  Is it possible that they've been put out to pasture?  Say it ain't so, Wilkie!