Exile - R.A. Salvatore

    1990; 307 pages.  New Author? : No.  Book 2 (out of 33) in the Legend of Drizzt series.  Genres: Epic Fantasy; Dungeons & Dragons; Sword & Sorcery.  Overall Rating: 8*/10.

 

    The dark elf Drizzt Do’Urden is fleeing for his life.  All sorts of people want him killed.

 

    Some of them are his own kin.  There’s his three sisters: Briza, Vierna, and Maya; and his older brother, Dinin.  Briza’s the most dangerous.  She’s a high priestess, capable of some powerful, deadly spellcasting.

 

    Right now, Drizzt’s siblings are after him at the behest of his mother, Malice Do’Urden.  He’s to be caught and brought back to face judgment.  Malice is not someone you want mad at you.  Her proper title is “Matron Malice”, and she's the leader of House Do’Urden, one of the most powerful houses in Menzoberranzan.

 

    Still, Drizzt’s chances of eluding capture are decent.  He’s traipsing around in a huge maze of underground tunnels and caverns called The Underdark.  He’s explored the area a lot more than any of his siblings.  Alas, Drizzt has offended a more powerful foe than anyone in his family.  Lolth, aka “The Spider Queen”, the main deity of the Dark Elves.

 

    And let's face it: when a goddess is after you, you’re doomed.

 

What’s To Like...

    Exile is the second book in R.A. Salvatore’s Legends of Drizzt series.  It takes places ten years after the events in Book One, Homeland, which is reviewed here.  That means Drizzt’s been on the run for quite some time, although a decade is admittedly a small part of a dark elf’s lifespan.  His only companion is a magical panther named Guenhwyvar, but the cat lives on an astral plane and only comes when danger threatens Drizzt.  The loneliness of his exile is slowly killing Drizzt.

 

    The main plotline chronicles Lolth’s efforts, through Matron Malice, to destroy the renegade warrior.  But we also watch Drizzt try to make friends and find companions to join him in his wanderings.  That’s a difficult task, since befriending someone cursed by the gods generally means being marked for death as well.

 

    The story takes place almost entirely underground, with lots of critters and other races to cross paths with and often cross swords with as well.  The book cover shows Drizzt being threatened by a pack of illithids, nasty creatures whose name translates into “Mind Flayers”.

 

    I liked R.A. Salvatore’s lighthearted approach to naming some of the characters.  Yes, this is Epic Fantasy at its finest, but you have to smile when being introduced to someone named Belwar Dissenguip, Elviddinvelp, Bristan Fendlestick, and my favorite, King Schnicktick.

 

    The book is divided into 26 chapters, plus a very helpful prelude which gives a brief backstory of Book One.  The ending is spread out over the last three chapters.  As you’d expect, Drizzt successfully overcomes the threats to his life, but at some terrible and unexpected collateral costs.  Things close with a teaser for the next book in the series, Sojourn, with Drizzt contemplating a trip to the aboveground part of his world, to get better acquainted with what is perhaps the strangest race of creatures he’s met thus far.

 

    Humans.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.7/5 based on 6,828 ratings and 557 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.23/5 based on 66,013 ratings and 1,522 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    “Get me information from Menzoberranzan, and quickly.  I like not the prospect of dark elves wandering about my front door.  It does so diminish the neighborhood.”

    Councilor Firble, the chief of covert security in Blingdenstone, nodded in agreement, though he wasn’t pleased by the request.  Information from Menzoberranzan was not cheaply gained, and it as often turned out to be a calculated deception as the truth.  Firble did not like dealing with anyone or anything that could outsmart him, and he numbered dark elves as first on that ill-favored list.  (loc. 1734)

 

    “Why do human wizards practice the art of magic at all?” Drizzt asked.

    Belwar shook his head.  “I do not believe that any scholars have yet discovered the reason,” he replied in all sincerity.  “A strange and dangerously unpredictable race are humans, and better to be left alone.”

    “You have met some?”

    “A few.”  Belwar shuddered, as though the memory was not a pleasant one.  “Traders from the surface.  Ugly things, and arrogant.  The whole of the world is only for them, by their thinking.”  (loc. 2555)

 

Kindle Details…

    Right now, Exile is selling for $7.99 at Amazon.  The other books in the series go for that same price.  R.A. Salvatore occasionally discounts a book or two, usually (but not always) from the first dozen books in the series.

 

“We do not consider friendship a debt.”  (loc. 1779)

    There’s very little profanity in Exile.  I noted less than a dozen cusswords throughout the whole book, most of which were “damn”.  When the circumstances called for swearing, the favorite phrase used was “magga cammara”, which means “by the stones”.  I don’t recall any “adult situations”.

 

    Overall, I found Exile to be a quick, yet entertaining read.  The pacing was quick, there was action aplenty, and the worldbuilding was once again fantastic.

 

    8 Stars.  One last plaudit for Exile.  The structure of the Dark Elves society is conspicuously matriarchal.  Women hold all the positions of power; there are high priestesses but no high priests; and Goddesses call the heavenly shots.  Males are generally regarded as dolts when it comes to spellcasting, and are really only useful when fighting is necessary.  I found this to be a refreshing deviation from the norm.

Goya - Rose-Marie & Rainer Hagen

   2003 & 2022; 95 pages.  Translator: Karen Williams.  Part of a 135-book series.  New Authors? : Yes.  Genres : Art history; Art Appreciation; Biography; Spain; Non-Fiction.  Overall Rating: 9½*/10.

 

    I like art.  In high school and junior high I enjoyed taking art classes, but I never took any in college.  Apparently such classes aren’t considered beneficial for a degree and career in Chemistry.

 

    I’m nutso about anything painted by Salvador Dali.  I’ve got several books giving comprehensive coverage of his works.  But beyond him, I know very little about any other artists.

 

    So it was time to learn about Francisco de Goya.

 

What’s To Like...

    Goya is divided into seven section, plus an appendix.  They are:

Part 1. : Cheerful Scenes for Gloomy Places

Part 2. : People of Yesterday – the Portraits

Part 3. : Nightmare and Social Critique

Part 4. : They Don’t Smile – Spain’s Women

Part 5. : One Can’t Tell Why – The Disasters of War

Part 6. : The Skies of Empty – the “Black” Paintings

Part 7. : A Love of Fear – the Bullfights

Appendix : Life and Work

 

    Each section covers a stage in Goya’s artistic career, and are arranged in chronological order.  The authors, Rose-Marie and Rainer Hagen, also briefly discuss what was going on in Goya’s life during each stage.  Each section also includes a half dozen or so of Goya’s artworks from that particular phase of his life.

 

    My favorite sections were Parts 3, 5, and 6.  Goya was a definite liberal, stuck in a place and time where such views could easily get you executed, either by the Roman Catholic Inquisition, the Napoleonic French army, the Spanish royalty, or the powers behind the throne.  That Goya managed to earn a living as a painter amongst all these folks, and stay alive, is nothing short of amazing.

 

    Each painting is accompanied by a short explanation of it: its title, the year(s) it was done, its size, the medium it was done in (e.g.: “oil on canvas”), and its present location.  Brief, revealing details of each of these works (such as facial expressions, clothing styles, and background colors) are given, and often expanded upon in the text.  I found these to be positively enlightening.

 

    I was surprised to find that I was familiar with several of Goya’s paintings, although admittedly I would not have been able to tell you who painted them.  And although the cheerfulness in his early paintings will lift anyone’s spirits, it is his depictions of the horrors of war, and other terrors, that will stay with you for a lifetime.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.7*/5, based on 87 ratings and 9 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.72*/5, based on 254 ratings and 17 reviews.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Cartoons (n.) : canvases in the format of the tapestries to be woven.

 

Excerpts...

    They (Goya’s sketches) are images which demonstrate no one-sided support either for the ideals of the French Revolution or for the glorious name of Goya’s own country.  They show the slaughter of both French and Spanish, and it is often impossible to tell for which side people are killing or dying.  This was new in the history of Western art.  Since the Egyptians and Greeks, the portrayal of battle had invariably served to glorify the victor.  (…)  Goya is interested only in what people do to each other, in how chaos and war turn peaceful citizens into brutal beasts.  (pg. 58)

 

    Open mouths were – and are still – considered taboo, both in society and, for a long time, in art.  Allegedly because they make the face ugly, but in truth more probably because the lips and mouth mark the start of the digestive tract – a part of the human body that remains anonymous, a part that cannot contribute to the desire for individuality as expressed, for example, in portraiture.  (…)  To look down the throat is to remember that our intellectual existence, which we consider our real one, is dependent upon organs and instinctual drives that we cannot control and at whose mercy we lie.  (pg. 81)

 

The fact that Goya includes himself in a royal portrait, in exactly the same way as his famous predecessor [Velasquez], shows how his opinion of himself has grown.”  (pg. 21)

    It’s hard to come up with anything to quibble about in Goya.  There is zero profanity in the text, but that’s to be expected in a book of Art.  There is one “nude” painting, accompanied by a “clothed” version of the same woman in the same pose, so guests could be shown whichever one wouldn’t offend or bore them.  There’s nothing lewd about the nude, but it did get the Inquisition’s attention, who let Goya know they’d be keeping a close eye on him.

 

    The book was originally written in Spanish and later translated into English.  And “English” in this case means “British”, not “American”.  But I didn’t find that to be distracting.

 

    Reading this book gave me a deep appreciation for Goya’s paintings, but I was expecting that.  As an artist, Goya is amazing.  What surprised me was the way the “real” Goya came through via the textual detailing of his life.  I had forgotten that Spain was fighting a savage civil war at this time, which was then capped off by Napoleon invading, conquering, and brutalizing the country.

 

    The book makes me eager to study Goya’s complete works, and fortunately, I have an e-book on my Kindle, 824 pages in length, and taking up oodles of my device’s storage memory, showing every one of Goya’s masterpieces.  Now that I’m acquainted with him, it’s time to get immersed in his works.

 

    9½ Stars.  Goya is only 95 pages long.  If you have a book report due tomorrow, where the subject matter must be the Fine Arts, and you haven’t even started reading anything yet, this book may be your salvation.  And though I read the hardcover version, there’s an instantly downloadable version of it for your e-reader.

Chasing Daisy - Scott Baron

   2018; 384 pages.  Book 4 (out of 5) in the series “The Clockwork Chimera”.  New Author? : No.  Genre : Space Opera; Alien Invasion Sci-Fi.  Overall Rating : 7½*/10.

 

    It’s time to finish the task. 

 

    With Daisy’s crucial help, the ragtag crew of humans, Chithiids, cyborgs, and Artificial Intelligences have sent the alien Ra’az baddies, who were in the process of stripping Earth of all its natural resources, fleeing in their spaceships to somewhere on the other side of the galaxy.

 

    Next up is the liberation of the Chithiids’ home planet, Taangaar.  Then it’s on to Ra’azengar, the home planet of the baddies.

 

    There are a couple things holding up progress.  First, no one is exactly sure of where the Ra’az home planet is, and the universe is a hugely big place to go searching blindly.  Even more importantly, Daisy and her friends don’t possess warp-drive technology.  Without that, trying to fly somewhere thousands of lightyears away will take . . . erm . . . thousands upon thousands of years.

 

    Maybe we should have some of the AI beings work on that.  Unless someone can think of a quicker way of gaining that technology.

 

What’s To Like...

    Chasing Daisy is the fourth book in Scott Baron’s (completed) “Clockwork Chimera” series.  The first half of the book dovetails with the neat plot twist at the end of Book 3, wherein Daisy learns that Quantum Physics predicts that, theoretically, not only can you instantly jump from one place in the universe to any other site, but you can also travel from one time to another just as easily.

 

    The first half of Chasing Daisy consists of her, Freya, and Sarah learning to function on a different timeline.  Like all conscientious time-travelers, they do their best to avoid creating temporal paradoxes, but their track record in this regard is less than perfect.  Indeed, they get quite adept at “correcting” earlier plotline anomalies, such as the “mysterious sniper” that Finn and his group encountered, a while back in the past, while doing a recon mission in Rome.

 

    Every reader of time-travel novels knows that such timeline alterations mean that Daisy’s triad risks being blipped out of existence at any moment.  Fortunately, History apparently is quite able to adjust to such things, albeit occasionally having to create anomalies like two “yous”.  See first excerpt, below.

 

    The multiple-timeline issues are eventually resolved, and the second half of the book focuses on the efforts by Daisy and the Dark Side personnel (at a surviving space base on the far side of the moon) to organize, and rally the disparate factions of inhabitants, both organic and inorganic, to unite in what, sadly, may well be a suicide mission.

 

    The ending is adequate, given that this is an “in-between” book, and should not be read as a standalone tale.  The good guys are poised to attempt to liberate the Chithiid homeworld, and I liked that the bad guys have some tricks up their sleeve as well.  Things once again close with a deft little plot twist that I didn’t see coming and which I’m sure will impact our heroes’ chances of success against the Ra’az.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.6/5 based on 388 ratings and 30 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.39/5 based on 333 ratings and 32 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    “I still don’t think she believes you about me, though.”

    “I know, but she will.”

    “You talking to the invisible me again?” Sarah asked, her doubting eyebrow held in a high arch.

    “Told ya so.”

    “But she’s real,” Freya interjected.  “She’s you, Sarah.  Well, not you, you, but you who has experienced what the other you hasn’t.”

    She stared at Daisy disbelievingly.

    “Do you guys really expect me to believe you have a little piece of me living in your head?”  (loc. 15939)

 

    “Hi, Finn,” Sarah said, stepping out from behind a large equipment mover.

    The jovial chef nearly choked on his cookie in shock.  The other Vali crew were likewise floored by her sudden appearance.

    “But…” Doctor McClain managed to blurt while the rest of the crew remained stunned and speechless.

    “But I’m dead.  Yeah, I know,” Sarah said with a little laugh.  “And let me tell you, being dead sucks.”  (loc. 17648)

 

Kindle Details…

    Chasing Daisy costs $3.99 at Amazon right now.  The other four books in the series are each in the $0.99-$3.99 range, and there is also a bundle of all five books for only $7.99, which is the format I’m reading.

 

“Fire it up, Freya.  Let’s do the time warp again.”  (loc. 15234)

    There’s a moderate amount of profanity.  I noted 15 instances in the first 10% (first 4 chapters, actually) of the book, which is fairly normal for this series.

 

    Once again, the ”Planning-versus-Doing Ratio” is heavily weighted towards the former.  But I suspect this is inevitable for any “in-between” book in a series.   And kudos to whoever did the editing on Chasing Daisy.  I noted only two typos, both of the effect/affect ilk, which is always a tough call.

 

    These are quibbles.  I’m enjoying The Clockwork Chimera series, but I’ve yet to figure out what that series' title references.  And yes, this is your typical “save the post-apocalyptic world” storyline, but somehow Scott Baron is managing to put a unique spin on that trope.

 

    Everything is now set for the ultimate showdown with the Ra’az.  I’m eager to see what the Planning-versus-Doing Ratio will be for the final installment in this series, Daisy’s War.  And to repeat, I strongly recommend investing in the 5-book bundle detailed above.  This is one series that's definitely better when read in order.

 

    7½ Stars.  Oh yeah, one last thing.  One of the plot threads in Chasing Daisy is left unresolved.  A fascinating character named Arlo makes a grand entrance around the halfway point of the book, bearing an urgent message for Daisy.  But who is he, how did he know where to find Daisy, who sent him, and is he a White Hat or a Black Hat?  I am looking forward to finding out in the next book.

The Night of Four Hundred Rabbits - Elizabeth Peters

    1971; 343 pages.  New Author? : No.  Genres: Amateur Sleuth; Travelogue; Mystery-Suspense; Drug Lecture; Mexico.  Overall Rating : 4*/10.

 

    All in all, Carol Farley has coped well.  As a child, she was always closer to her dad than her mom.  George always read books to her, and they loved sharing giggles together at some of the funny parts.  Those were good times.

 

    Then, ten years ago, her dad disappeared.  Without a trace.  Without an explanation.

 

    But it didn’t crush Carol.  She’s a college student now, and has a boyfriend, Danny, to whom she’ll surely get married once she gets her degree.  Today, she’s just returned to school after Christmas vacation, and there’s a letter waiting for her.  Containing a newspaper clipping.  With a photograph.  Of her father.

 

    In good health.  In a tuxedo.  At some swank party.  Enjoying himself.  In Mexico City.

 

    Carol's path is clear.  It’s time to extend her Christmas vacation a few more days and take a trip south of the border.  And have a confrontation.

 

What’s To Like...

    The Night of Four Hundred Rabbits is written in the first-person POV, Carol’s.  It chronicles her trip to Mexico City to get some answers from her father.  On one hand she’s relieved, since paternal foul play can now be ruled out.  On the other hand, she’s pissed since it’s now obvious he voluntarily chose to desert his family a decade ago.

 

    The father-daughter meeting occurs fairly early in the book.  Unsurprisingly it spawns more questions than answers, the first of which of course is: who sent that newspaper clipping to Carol, and why, and how did they know her address?  From there, things quickly get more complicated.

 

    Since she’s in Mexico City, with boyfriend Danny, Carol decides to take in the sights, in particular the old Aztec ruins of Tenochtitlan.  Even though the info-dumps of these archaeological visits were awkwardly written, Carol's trips there were my favorite parts of the story.  Also, since Carol’s Spanish vocabulary is quite limited, it was amusing to watch her struggle to communicate with the locals, yet it was fun to watch her learn a few words in Spanish, as well as gain an appreciation for the Mexican culture and Aztec history.

 

    The ending is adequate but contrived.  The plans of the bad guys are thwarted, but that’s because they arrogantly reveal too much, thus making it easy for the good guys.  I call this the “Austin Powers syndrome”.

 

    The Night of Four Hundred Rabbits is a standalone novel, and quite a divergence from Elizabeth Peters’ more-famous Amelia Peabody series.  I was intrigued by the 400 Rabbits referenced in the book’s title, and which is given two explanations in the text.  To reveal those meanings would be a spoiler.

 

Excerpts...

    “They really dig blondes in the Latin countries.  You don’t think I’d let you go wandering off alone, do you?”

    “My hero,” I murmured, touching my cheek.

    “Your gigolo.  I don’t have a dime.”

    “Oh, stop that.”

    “What’s mine is yours, what’s yours is mine?”

    “Of course, I thought we agreed that money was the lousy root of all evil.”

    “Right.  The thing to do is spend it fast before it can corrupt you.”  (pg. 35)

 

    “I freaked out,” he said.

    “You sure did.”

    “What did I say?  Did you write it down?”

    “No.  You said that the universe was a vast cesspool of love.”

    “What?”

    “That was your best effort.  You said it seventy-nine times.  I counted.  While I was cleaning up the rug where you threw up.”  (pg. 201)

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.1*/5, based on 166 ratings and 25 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.49*/5, based on 2,025 ratings and 91 reviews.

 

“Hotel,” I said, wishing to God I had taken Spanish instead of World Philosophy in my junior year.  (pg. 191)

    There’s only a smattering of profanity in The Night of Four Hundred Rabbits.  I counted just seven instances in the first third of the book, and they were all of the “milder” 4-letter variety.  Nor is there any sex, which is surprising since college-age Carol is traveling with her beau, yet takes time to mention that she is still a virgin.

 

    Drugs are another matter.  I came away feeling the author’s main purpose for writing this story was to rant about the mortal dangers of drug usage.  Yes, she takes a few jabs at pot, pep pills, and heroin; but mostly she rails against psychedelics of all kinds: mescaline, peyote, LSD, and psilocybin.

 

    As mentioned already, there are some blatantly amateurish info dumps, including a vague reference to Art Linkletter’s daughter’s fatal attempt to fly.  At one point, she also has Carol take an unintended acid trip.  Reading that, all I can say is it's evident that Elizabeth Peters’ research did NOT involve experiencing any hallucinations firsthand.

 

    I’d take a harsher stance on this, except it needs to be noted that The Night of Four Hundred Rabbits was written in 1971, when gazillions of young people were tripping out and Art Linkletter’s daughter had just jumped out of the sixth-floor of a building.

 

    The bottom line is: I found The Night of Four Hundred Rabbits to be a poor read; full of poor writing, poor storytelling, ill-fitting info dumps, and misleading opinions about hallucinogenic drugs.  I’d recommend this book only to those who think Reefer Madness (say what?!) is a great documentary film.

 

    4 Stars.  One last criticism.  On pages 221-225, the author lays down yet another rant, this time about the pointlessness of the game of chess.  Really.  That cuts me deeply since I’ve played and enjoyed chess all my life.  It is quite evident that Elizabeth Peters has never had the slightest urge to learn to play it.

Rome and Attila - Nick Holmes

    2024; 281 pages.  Book 3 (out of 3, but eventually 6) in “The Fall of the Roman Empire” series.  Full Title: Rome and Attila: Rome’s Greatest Enemy.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Ancient History; Rome; Non-Fiction.  Overall Rating : 9*/10.

 

    Quick, what person and/or barbarian tribe were most responsible for the collapse of the western Roman empire?

 

    Well, I remember from my college history class a Germanic leader named Alaric, and he and his Visigoths did a brutal sack of Rome.  But that was in 410 CE, and I was taught that Rome fell in 476 C, long after Alaric was dead.  So something doesn’t quite add up.

 

    The guy who deposed the last emperor of Rome in 476 was named Odoacer.  He declared himself king of Italy, and he was a barbarian.  But he was the leader of the pitiful remains of the Roman army when he took over, which is misleading since those Roman legions were mostly made up of Germanic mercenaries.

 

    A case could be made for the Vandals under the leadership of Gaiseric.  They conquered Carthage in 439 CE, cutting off vital grain shipments and tax revenues to Rome.  That was a devastating blow, but Gaiseric never set foot in Rome.

 

    Nick Holmes proposes a different candidate: Attila the Hun, even though he also never set foot in Rome, died in 453 CE, and never claimed the throne.  Let’s see what kind of case can be made for Attila and his Huns.

 

What’s To Like...

    Rome and Attila, Book 3 in a projected 6-volume series, focuses on the short-but-critical historical time period 410-476 CE, although it also recaps the events of 360-410 CE, which were spotlighted in Book 2.  This book is divided into four parts, namely:

    Part 1. The Origin of Our Destruction:  pg. 23, 8 sections

    Part 2. The False Dawn: pg. 68, 8 sections

    Part 3. The Scourge of God: pg. 111, 11 sections

    Part 4. The Last Days of the Empire:  pg. 205, 8 sections

 

    I enjoyed learning about all sorts of movers and shakers in the decline of the Roman Empire.  Attila receives the primary focus; all of Part 3 is devoted to his life and its impact on both halves of the Roman Empire.  A lot of other players are also introduced, including Ataulf, Valentinian III, Aetius, Theodoric, Ricimer, Marjorian, and the already-mentioned trio Alaric, Gaiseric, and Odoacer. A number of influential women are also introduced to the reader, including Galla Placidia, Hypatia, Honoria (see below), Kreka, Aelia Pulcheria, and Aelia Eudocia.  Galla Placidia is a particularly memorable.

 

    I was impressed with the way Nick Holmes juggles the various kingdoms and tribes and their activities and migrations.  The reader has to keep track of Western Roman Emperors, Eastern Roman Emperors, Persians, Huns, White Huns, Visigoths, usurpers, Vandals, and all sorts of Germanic tribes, each carrying out their own agenda.  Yet somehow it never became confusing.

 

    I also liked the way other influences are presented in explaining the Rome’s collapse.  Climate change caused the Huns to pull up stakes and move en masse eastward.  The Huns used mercenaries as well, and therefore were dependent on Roman tribute to keep their position of power.  The Persian Empire was being beset by other Hunnic hordes, so they became keen on maintaining friendly relations with Constantinople.

 

    The occasional “aside” sections were also great.  When Rome fell, what happened to the legionnaires stationed in the hinterlands?  Who were the Huns, where did they come from, and why did they disappear so quickly upon Attila’s death?  How did the lives of ordinary citizens change after law and order collapsed throughout the western Empire?  The interludes addressing these questions were both fascinating and informative.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.5/5 based on 23 ratings and 0 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.53/5 based on 17 ratings and 2 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    [Constantine] and his son, Julian, were taken prisoner and beheaded.  Their heads were then sent to Ravenna where they were put on spears and displayed amid a growing collection of such trophies, including the head of the unfortunate Stilicho.

    With Constantine III and his son, Constans, eliminated, the imperial roll call reduced to four emperors, with the remaining usurpers Maximus in Hispania and Priscus Attalus with Ataulf’s Goths.  But almost immediately there was yet another rebellion in Gaul, this time led by a Gallo-Roman called Jovinus.  In these dark years, usurpers appeared and disappeared a bit like moles in a game of whack-a-mole.  (loc. 833)

 

    Women continued to dominate Roman politics that year for Valentinians III’s sister, Honoria, booked her place in history in a most spectacular and bizarre fashion by appealing to Attila to save her from a marriage arranged by her brother.  He wanted her to marry a Roman senator called Herculanus, whose key attributes were inherited money and a lack of ambition.  Honoria’s response was that he might be called Herculanus, but he did not exactly look like Hercules.  (loc. 1912)

 

Kindle Details…

    Rome and Attila is free for a limited time right now, but normally sells for $3.99, which is the same price as the first two books in the series, The Roman Revolution and The Fall of Rome.  An earlier work of the author, The Byzantine World War is available for just $0.99.

 

He was just as scheming and back-stabbing as any good Roman.  (loc. 1151)

    There are a couple things to quibble about in Rome and Attila, but cussing isn’t one of them.  There is none, nor is there any other R-rated stuff.

 

    The footnotes worked superbly.  For the most part they were used to cite the sources for various quotes used.  There were ten very useful maps, but their links in the text didn’t work.  A  number of the 18 photographs included are positively stunning (such as the Theodosian walls built to defend Constantinople), but I don’t recall any links in the text to them.  Not to fear though, working links to all of these can be found in the front of the book, right after the Table of Contents, and all the photos are grouped together immediately after Chapter 21.

 

    As mentioned earlier, Part 1 covers events already covered in the previous book, often using word-for-word repetition.  I anticipate some reviewers criticizing this “double-dipping” (it encompasses 60 pages or so), but I found it a helpful segue.  Certainly if there’s any appreciable time gap between reading the previous book and this one, Part 1 will put your memory “in sync” again.

 

    I’ve read all three “Fall of the Roman Empire” and have thoroughly enjoyed each one.  I was happy to hear that the projected length of the series has increased from four books to six.  I’m particularly intrigued about what the subject matter of Book 4 will be.  The remnants of the Western Roman Empire falling into a prolonged abyss called the Dark Ages?  The Eastern Roman Empire learning to get along without its European sibling?  Or is the focus equally divided between both halves of the kingdom?  I eagerly await finding out.

 

    9 Stars.  One last quibble, this one concerning the book’s cover.  I normally don’t critique such things in a book review, but take another look at the image above.  Doesn’t it seem like “Rome’s Greatest Enemy” is referring to Nick Holmes?   Once it is seen, it cannot be unseen.

Revenge of the Spellmans - Lisa Lutz

   2009; 372 pages.  New Author? : No, but it’s been a while. Book 3 (out of 6) in the “The Spellmans” series.  Genres : Private Investigators; Humorous Crime Fiction; Dysfunctional Comedy.  Overall Rating : 9*/10.

 

    Most likely, it’s going to be an easy job.

 

    Ernie Black wants Isabel “Izzy” Spellman to tail his wife whenever she leaves the house.  He thinks she might be having an affair.  Izzy is happy to take the job.  She needs the money and in this case the hours per week she spends keeping track of Mrs. Black will be short and lucrative.

 

    That’s important because Izzy’s life is busy at the moment.  She’s recently parted company with her parents’ family-owned and -staffed Spellman Investigations, and is now moonlighting as a bartender at a local dive called The Philosopher’s Club.  She’s also attending court-mandated psychological counseling sessions due to her indiscretions in a recent operation.

 

      Fortunately, wife-tailing surveillance usually turns out to be many hours of sitting in a stake-out car, bored stiff, only to find out the husband’s suspicions are unfounded.  With a little luck, that’s how this one will turn.

 

    Unfortunately, Izzy’s luck hasn’t been all that good lately.

 

What’s To Like...

    Revenge of the Spellmans is the third book in Lisa Lutz’s (presumably) completed 6-volume series titled “The Spellmans”.  Technically, I’m reading these books in order, although there has been a ten-year gap between this one and the previous one.

 

    The book is written in the first-person POV, Izzy’s, and her hilarious, self-deprecating outlook on life is one of the big plusses for these tales.  The Spellman family is utterly dysfunctional; which is amplified by the fact that they all work in the same family business, including the youngest sibling, 16-year-old Rae, who despite earning mediocre grades in her classes, has just scored a phenomenal (PSAT) college board result.  Everyone is sure she cheated somehow, but no one can figure out how she did it.

 

    Izzy has her own woes.  The counseling sessions are going poorly, she has housing and employment issues, someone keeps moving her car, and her new PI job rapidly gets more complicated.  It all gets worse when a blackmailer contacts her.

 

    The text has a slew of witty footnotes that even Terry Pratchett would be proud of, which frequently reference an Appendix in the back of the book that contains all sorts of interesting information, including handy bios of all the main characters.  Due to my ten-year hiatus from this series, I read that whole section at the start; it was very helpful.

    I enjoyed the story’s setting: San Francisco, which is one of my favorite travel spots.  I especially liked Izzy’s forced visits to some local cultural sites, including SFMOMA, where the impressive artwork, “Erased de Kooning Drawing”, really is on display.  Yeah, google it.

 

    The ending is good.  All the mysteries and uncertainties in Izzy’s life are all cleared up, usually via some neat plot twist that neither Izzy nor I saw coming.  Izzy also finally figures out how Rae is achieving those high PSAT scores.  There’s a warmhearted Epilogue to close things out telling how several of Izzy’s acquaintances continue on with their lives.  Revenge of the Spellmans is part of a series, but it also does just fine as a standalone novel.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

    Shiksa (n.) : a gentile girl or woman  (Hebrew}.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.5/5 based on 659 ratings and 118 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.13/5 based on 17,890 ratings and 1,127 reviews.

 

Kindle Details…

    Revenge of the Spellmans currently sells for $10.99 at Amazon.  The other five books in the series are in the $4.99-$13.99 price range.  Lisa Lutz has a number of other standalone e-books, in both fiction and non-fiction genres.

 

Excerpts...

    I am a licensed private investigator who has been working for the family business, Spellman Investigations, since the age of twelve.  No, that is not a typo.  It sounds fun, I know.  But after decades of having your boyfriends investigated, your bedroom searched, your phones tapped, your vehicle tracked, and your every move documented, it gets old.  In my family, we don’t ask questions, we investigate.  (loc. 542)

 

    “I’m sorry, I’ll get out of here soon, I promise,” I said.

    “Don’t worry about it,” David said.

    “You’re being suspiciously nice,” I said.

    “I’m your brother.  I’m going to be nice on random occasions.”

    “Thanks.  But I’m trying to understand why this time you were so nice.”

    “Honestly, because you were so, so . . . pathetic.”

    “True,” I replied.

    “You need to take a shower,” David said.

    It had been three days.  I couldn’t argue with him.  (loc. 4247)

 

“Meditate on your own time!”  (loc. 4350)

    There’s very little to grouse about in Revenge of the Spellmans.  The profanity is sparse, just 5 instances in the first 25% of the book, and those were all of the “milder” variety.  To be fair, though, a couple of f-bombs do crop up later on.

 

    Things do not “build to an exciting climax” here.  But keep in mind this is a “Private Investigator” story, not a “Amateur Detective” one.  Such a case is successful if the client is happy with whatever information the investigator turns up without the police becoming involved.

 

    Revenge of the Spellmans was a complete reading treat for me.  I was fascinated by the various textual formats that Lisa Lutz utilizes, and the storyline moved at a sufficiently brisk pace that kept me turning the pages.  If you’re looking for a something to read akin to Charlaine Harris’s Sookie Stackhouse or Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum novels, this series is right for you.

 

    9 Stars.  There were two neat acronyms worth mentioning: somebody throws an “ECOT party”, and a somebody has a “MILFO”.  Read the book to find out what they mean, and with regards to the latter one, it's not as dirty as you think.