Call Me A Cab - Donald E. Westlake

   2022 (but written in 1977/78); 244 pages.  New Author? : No.  Genres : Humorous Fiction; Satire; Romantic Satire.  Overall Rating: 7½*/10.

 

    For New York City Checker Cab driver, Thomas Fletcher, it was a good fare.  Not only was the run from East 62^nd Street to Kennedy airport a long and lucrative one, but the woman who had just sat down in the back seat of his cab looked pleasant in his rearview mirror.

 

    She was, however, a little bit weird.  She spent much of the ride muttering to herself, and kept putting up both hands to the sides of her face, like blinkers on a horse.  A troubled soul, perhaps, or maybe even a suicidal one.  Maybe it would be prudent to make some small talk with her.

 

    Not to worry, though.  It turns out she’s on her way to Los Angeles to get married and she’s having second thoughts about the whole thing.  She’s got five hours on the NYC-to-LA flight to sort things out in her head.

 

    That isn’t enough time to make an important decision.  It calls for a change in plans.  Instead of taking her to the airport, the woman requests Thomas to take her to Los Angeles.  In his cab.

 

    I wonder how Thomas is going to calculate the cab fare for this job now.

 

What’s To Like...

    The plotline in Call Me A Cab is easily described: We ride along with the cabbie, Tom, and his fare, Katherine, on their cross-country jaunt.  The former is divorced, stuck in a mind-numbing job (and that only because his dad owns a Checker cab franchise), and pragmatic.  The latter is single and well-to-do (she’d better be, she’s paying for this coast-to-coast cab ride), with a successful career as a landscape architect, and nervously idealistic.

 

    The story is told from a first-person POV (Tom’s) and our two protagonists engage in discussions that are both insightful and witty.  Beneath the banter, though, Donald Westlake gives some enlightened views on feminism.  They might be pretty normal in today’s world, but in 1977, when Westlake was writing this book, they were cutting edge.  One example: a headwaiter who simply can’t bring himself to present the bill for a meal-for-two to the woman at the table.

 

    Needless to say, there aren’t a lot of characters to keep track of, just Tom, Katherine, and her beau that’s eagerly awaiting her arrival in Los Angeles, a successful plastic surgeon named Barry.  I thought the descriptions of the countryside the cab passes through along the way was a charming bit of Americana.

 

    Equally charming was the step back into time, with things like phone booths, smoking in restaurants, roadmaps, Stuckey’s, a towing fee of only $65, 25-cent jukeboxes, and “dry” spots in the Midwest (counties where you couldn’t buy alcohol legally).  I enjoyed meeting Boyd and Laura Chasen, and chuckled at Tom’s attempts to learn chess from Katherine.  Hey, Tom, you’re first clue that she was good at chess was the fact that she carries a “travel set” with her on trips.  Your second clue was when she announced “mate in three”.

 

    The ending is satisfying and hopeful, albeit not particularly exciting.  I wouldn’t call it “twisty” either, although I have to admit things didn’t close the way I expected.  Call Me A Cab is a standalone novel, and not part of any of Westlake’s series.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.4*/5, based on 154 ratings and 15 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.96*/5, based on 313 ratings and 64 reviews

 

Excerpts...

    “It’s about getting married.”

    “Married?”  I don’t believe in marriage.  “Good luck,” I said, and some irony may have crept into my voice.

    “It isn’t right,” she said.  “I just keep turning the poor guy down.”

    “Maybe he’s the wrong guy.”

    “He’s the right guy,” she insisted.  “He’s sweet and understanding, he’s handsome and rich, he loves me and I love him— what more could I possibly want?”

    “Thursdays off?”  (loc. 151)

 

    “My car quit.  I think it’s the starter.”

    “Does it go gruh-gruh-gruh?”  The sound he made was uncannily like a car when the battery is low.

    “No,” I said.  “It goes click.”

    “Sounds like the starter,” he admitted.  “For openers, you’re gonna need a tow.”

    “For starters,” I punned.  Or tried to.  (loc. 1980)

 

Kindle Details…

    Call Me A Cab sells for $8.99 right now at Amazon.  There are dozens of Donald E. Westlake e-books available at Amazon; they range in price from $1.99 to $14.99.  If you’ve never read any Donald Westlake novels, a good place to start is anything from his Dortmunder series.

 

“Don’t laugh, this is serious.  We may have started a new religion.”  (loc. 1916)

    There’s not much cussing in Call Me A Cab.  I noted only 19 instances in the entire book, with only one of those an f-bomb.  There’s one roll-in-the-hay, but the participants are not the pair you’d think it would be.

 

    A bigger problem for most readers is what isn’t in the book.  Those who are already acquainted with Donald Westlake’s stories, such as the Dortmunder series, might be disappointed to find no crimes occur here.  And readers new to Westlake may be bored by the lack of any thrills-and-spills in the storyline.

 

    Those concerns have merit, but fortunately Donald Westlake’s storytelling skills save the day.  Call Me A Cab was a quick and easy read, and held my interest from start to finish.  It may be a bit short on the excitement, but when it comes to personal interactions and well-written drama, it shines.

 

    7½ Stars.  Call Me A Cab was written in 1977-78, but wasn’t published until 2022, 14 years after Donald Westlake passed away.  Kudos to publisher Charles Ardai at Hard Case Crime for developing this manuscript into a full-length book (it previously appeared in a shortened version in Redbook magazine) and sharing this lost gem with the public.