The Great Troll War - Jasper Fforde

    2021; 353 pages.  Book 4 (out of 4) in the “Last Dragonslayer” series.  New Author? : No.  Genre : Fantasy; YA.  Overall Rating : 8*/10.

 

   The Trolls are coming!  The Trolls are coming!!

 

    And the entire population of the UnUnited Kingdom is quaking in their boots.  Well, everyone that’s still alive, anyway.  Trolls find humans to be a culinary delight.  There are so many good ways to cook them and eat them.

 

    The Trolls have advanced to the border of the Kingdom of Snodd, but they’ve been stymied there, thanks to the Button Trench.  Trolls despise buttons.  No one knows why, but the Button Trench is keeping them out of Snodd.  For now.

 

    Jennifer Strange has been put in charge of organizing Snodd’s defenses for if and when the Button Trench fails.  Things could be worse.  Snodd has called up hundreds of fencers, marksmen, and warriors to aid in her cause.  There’s just one problem.

 

    There seems to have been a bit of a communications mishap when recruiting those soldiers.

 

What’s To Like...

    The Great Troll War is the fourth and concluding book in Jasper Fforde’s “The Last Dragonslayer” fantasy series.  There’s a 7-year gap (2014-2021) between publication of the previous book in the series, The Eye of Zoltar, and this one.  The story is told in the first-person POV, Jennifer’s.

 

    As always, Jasper Fforde combines masterful storytelling with lots of wit.  How *do* you repel a horde of Trolls who have the advantage in size, power and most importantly, wizardry?  Meanwhile, Jennifer has to contend with princesses behaving badly, games of Thrones, and the realization that her magic is puny compared to the evil mastermind directing the Troll invasion, "The Mighty Shandar".

 

    The book is written in English, not American, which features weird spellings including centred, despatch, storeys, dykes, pyjamas, and manoeuvring.  Jeez, spellchecker hated that sentence.  There are some witty acronyms, such as HENRY, which stands for Hex Energy Neutralising Reversal Yieldiser, and even a brief moment where Jasper Fforde personally breaks down the fourth wall.  I liked the nods to Pachelbel and the movie Back To The Future, and enjoyed the ride on the Cloud Leviathan.

 

    The ending is a stutter-step affair.  After the titular Troll War issue is resolved, the storyline segues into a final showdown theme, pitting Jennifer and The Mighty Shandar.  Fortuitously, this allows Fforde to tie up several plot threads.  Things close on a sad-yet-hopeful, unexpected-yet-hinted-at, dark note.  It wraps up the series succinctly, yet leaves the door open for a sequel.  However, I have a feeling this series is done for good.

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.5/5 based on 976 ratings and 45 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.17/5 based on 1,570 ratings and 212 reviews.

 

Excerpts...

    “Numerical values are seriously overrated.  Here’s another example.  If I were to tell you the mass of the sun is roughly 2 x 10³⁰ kilograms then it would just be a meaninglessly high number – ten with thirty noughts after it.”

    “I agree with that,” said the Princess.

    “Right,” said the Troll.  “But if I were to tell you the sun has 99.86 per cent of the combined mass of the entire solar system, what would that mean?”

    “It would mean . . . wow,” said the Princess.

    “Exactly,” said the Troll, grinning broadly.  “Wow.”  (loc. 1344)

 

    “I’ve only got a few things to say, and I shall be brief.  Firstly, I am to wield absolute power in all the Kingdoms, and anyone who has not signed the book of allegiance in the foyer will be considered an enemy of the Crown.  But, to show my caring nature, they shall not be executed, but banished: thrown forcibly across the Button Trench in the direction of the Trolls after being painted with gravy.”  (loc. 2069)

 

Kindle Details…

    The Great Troll War presently sells for $2.99 at Amazon.  The other 3 books in the series range in price from $6.07 to $9.99.  Jasper Fforde offers about 16 other e-novels, in the form of several other series, and costing anywhere from $2.99 to $14.99.

 

“There are always a few naysayers who want to rain on your parade when you contemplate galactic domination.”  (loc. 3239)

    The target audience is YA, so The Great Troll War is virtually profanity-free; I noted just one “damn” and three “hells” in the entire book.  I don’t recall any adult situations.  The editing is superb; the only typo I saw was a variant spelling of Princess Jocamanica’s name: “Jocaminca”, and I’m not even sure if that wasn't just a deliberate snubbing of her. 

 

    The seven-year hiatus between Books 3 and 4 means a lot of readers, including me, remembered little about recurring characters and overarching storylines.  The author cleverly addresses this by back-referencing past events and beings from earlier books via footnotes, but some reviewers thought this was overdone.  Personally, I found that I could follow the storyline easily even when bypassing the footnotes.

 

    Overall, I felt that Jasper Fforde’s ultimate aim in writing The Great Troll War was to bring closure to this series, and in this regard he succeeded nicely.  I wasn’t blown away by the way it ended, yet the story kept me entertained throughout.  There is a rumor afoot that a series-ending eighth book in Fforde’s fabulous Thursday Next series, Dark Reading Matter, will be coming out in June 2025, and I’m looking forward to finding out how he pulls that one off.

 

    8 Stars.  One last thing.  Two catchy little sidelights in The Great Troll War are the “20:1 Quickener Spell” and the “El Carisma pout”.  I simply have to figure out some way to learn both of these talents.

Early Riser - Jasper Fforde

   2018; 400 pages.  New Author? : No.  Genres: Dystopian Fantasy, Alternate History.  Overall Rating : 7½*/10.

 

    It’s late autumn in Wales, and we all know what that means, right?

 

    Yep, it’s time to eat two or three times as much as we normally do, and hopefully gain twenty, thirty and if we’re lucky, maybe even forty pounds in a hurry.

 

    Because Winter is fast approaching, and come Slumberdown, the day we start our hibernation, we want to be as heavy as possible.  Just like the bears, we'll go to sleep, not wake up until Springrise, and all that extra poundage will keep us nourished in between.  “Slim and trim” is a fatal condition for hibernators.

 

    That’s the routine for most of the population.  But a few people have to stay awake, both to protect those hibernating and to fix anything that might break down.  Wintertime in Wales, and many other places, is exceptionally harsh.

 

    Charlie Worthing has just volunteered for the Winter Consul Services, those guardians of the deep sleep.  He has a lot to learn, not much time to do it, and above all, get rid of his dreams.

 

    Because dreaming can be a terminal condition.

 

What’s To Like...

    Every Jasper Fforde novel I’ve read has fantastic worldbuilding, and Early Riser is no exception.  Presenting a plausible scenario of modern-day civilization dealing with fantasy creatures during a rip-snorting Ice Age is no easy task, but Fforde handles it deftly.  The entire story is set in Wales, mostly in a place called the Gower Peninsula, which is both real and scenic.  It is told in the first-person POV, that of the protagonist, Charlie.

 

    There’s a handy schematic of a dormitorium (a what?) which reminded me of the underground structures in Hugh Howey’s Silo series, except here they are aboveground.  The text overflows with wit, a Fforde staple, and there are lots of neat weapons (most of which go “Whump”), and critters (most of which go “Chomp”) to meet and give a proper amount of respect to.

 

    The tale is written in English, Jasper Fforde’s mother tongue, so American readers may have to suss out the meaning of some weird phrases such as “pumping out the zeds”, “come a cropper”, and “car park”.  But that’s a fun task.  Acronym-lovers will also be kept entertained, and any when’s the last time you read a tale where being fat is admirable and being thin is reprehensible?

 

Charlie and the reader both have lots of stuff to figure out, including:

    a.) What is Project Lazarus?

    b.) Who is Kiki, and why does he/she need the cylinder?

    c.) Is there a better alternative to the dream-quelling drug called “Morphenox”?

    d.) What’s so special about dreams involving blue Buicks, oak trees, severed hands, and being buried alive?

 

    There are some neat music references along the way: Tom Jones (well, he’s Welsh, so this is no surprise), Bonzo Dog Band, Mott The Hoople, The Dark Side of the Moon, Ziggy Stardust, Mott The Hoople (again!), Fleetwood Mac's "Rumours" album, Val Doonican (who?), and Richard Stilgoe (who?  Wiki him).  The text is very clean – only 9 cusswords in the first hundred-pages, and limited to scatological and afterworld references, plus the pseudo cuss-phrase “Gronk’s dung in a piss-pot” which made me chuckle.

 

    Like Charlies, you may find yourself wandering around in a fog while reading the first 300 pages of Early Riser, but if you persevere, you’ll be rewarded with a spectacular 100-page ending, full of lots of excitement and full explanations for what’s going on and why.  Early Riser is a rare standalone novel by Jasper Fforde, and is not set in the worlds of any of his previous series.

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Come a cropper (n., phrase) : to fall heavily (a Britishism).

Others: Snaffle (v., also a Britishism).

 

Ratings…
    Amazon:  4.4/5 based on 928 ratings and 262 reviews.

    Goodreads: 3.87/5 based on 13,404 ratings and 2,204 reviews

 

Excerpts...

    “The enemy aren’t the Villains, womads, scavengers, insomniacs, Ice-Hermits, Megafauna, nightwalkers, hiburnal rodents or flesh-eating cold slime — it’s the Winter.  To survive, you need to respect her first.  What do you need to do?”

    “Respect the Winter.”  I paused.  “Sir?”

    “Yes?”

    “What’s flesh-eating cold slime?”

    “It’s probably best not to think about that.”  (pg. 28)

 

    “Did you do any dreaming on your four-week sojourn to the dark side?”

    “No, ma’am.”

    “Good,” she said.  “The one thing I loathe more than winsomniacs is dreamers.  Feet on the ground, head out of the clouds.  Agree?”

    “Yes, ma’am.”

    “I don’t like subordinates always agreeing,” she said.  “Sycophants have no place in my department.  You’re to speak your mind when the opportunity calls for it.”

    “How will I know when that is?”

    “I shall inform you.”  (pg. 216)

 

“I hope the Gronk lays eggs in your brain, Mrs. Nesbit!”  (pg. 107)

    There are some nits to pick, but no show-stoppers.

 

    The first 3/4 of the book is not only confusing, it is also slow.  Charlie wanders around, trying unsuccessfully to make sense of what's real and what’s a dream, and what's happening to the various “non-productives” of the not-asleep society, namely the nightwalkers, winsomniacs, and Villains.  There’s also the matter of determining whether Gronks are real; a bet is riding on that.

 

    The “advertisements” at the end of the book, another Jasper Fforde staple, were great, and the footnotes were okay (although not on a par with Discworld footnotes in wittiness), but the abstracts at the start of every chapter didn’t do anything for me.  There were lots of chapters, but no list of them with their page numbers at the beginning of the book, so back-referencing was a pain.  But I read the hardcover edition, and this may not be true of the e-book version.

 

    Lastly, and leastly, the Wikipedia article on Jasper Fforde is in desperate need of updating.

 

    That's enough of the quibbling.  In the “Acknowledgements” section at the end of the book, Jasper Fforde mentions his “creative hiatus of 2014-2016”.  Early Riser was his first published book after that three-year gap, and maybe we should cut him a little slack.  To be clear, this isn’t a case of Early Riser being a poor book, it’s a case of his earlier books, particularly his Thursday Next series, being JUST. SO. GOOD. 

 

    7½ Stars.  One last thing to note, courtesy of Wikipedia:

 

    “The novel is notable because Fforde never uses a gender descriptive pronoun for the protagonist Charlie Worthing, referring to Charlie variously as they/them, I/me, and as simply 'Charlie'.”

 

    Incredible.  Only an exceptionally-skilled author could pull this off, and I am in awe that Jasper Fforde could do this.

The Eye of Zoltar - Jasper Fforde

    2014; 398 pages.  Book Three (out of 3) in The Chronicles of Kazam series  New Author? : No.  Genre : YA; Fantasy.  Overall Rating : 8*/10.

    All in all, the task that The Mighty Shandar has assigned to Jennifer Strange isn’t too bad.  Find something called The Eye of Zoltar.  Which is said to be hidden somewhere on Cadir Idris, per the Sky Pirate Wolff telling somebody or other.

    Except, no one’s exactly sure what the Eye of Zoltar looks like.  Indeed, many say it's just a legend.  Plus, The Pirate Wolff hasn’t been seen for years.  And as for Cadir Idris, lots of people have entered its domain.  None have ever returned.

    But lives depend on completing The Mighty Shandar’s task, one of which is Jennifer’s.  Just don’t call this a quest.  Quests require a license and the cost to get one of those is staggering.  So let's just call this a  search.

What’s To Like...

    The Eye of Zoltar is Book 3 of the Chronicles of Kazam series, aka The Last Dragonslayer series, and starts a mere two weeks after the end of Book 2.  There are new lands to traipse through (the Cambrian Empire, Cadir Idris); new people to meet (Addie, Princess Shazza, et. al.) and new beasts to avoid getting eaten by (the Tralfamosaur and the Cloud Leviathan, for two).

    As with any Jasper Fforde  book, there are several plotlines going on simultaneously.  Here, in addition to looking for the Eye of Zoltar, Jennifer has to unspoil a princess, pay ransom for a wizard, and follow the bouncing dragon.  Kewlness.  But Fforde also addresses more serious themes here, including the senselessness of war, predestination, and (surprisingly) the business of trading commodities and futures.

    Some familiar characters get fleshed out, among them King Snodd, Queen Mimosa, and The Mighty Shandar.  Chapter 1 gives a backstory for those who aren’t reading the series in order.  The book starts out in the usual way – we join Jennifer and company on a Kazam “Mystical Arts” mission.

    As always, Jasper Fforde’s incomparable wit blends in smoothly with his superb storytelling.  I did feel like the story dragged once or twice, especially when traveling through the wilds of Cambria.  But the lags are few and far between.  Finally, a quick shout-out to the citing of Rachmaninoff’s 3rd Piano Concerto; a fantastic piece of music.  You have excellent tastes, Mr. Fforde!

Kewlest New Word...

Billycan (n.) : a lightweight cooking pot which is used on a campfire or a camping stove.

Excerpts...

    “…considering the loathsome creatures that either squirm, squelch, drift, or creep around this country, a dragon has a terror rating of two.  And to put that into context, a Tralfamosaur is a five, and my gran is an eight.”

    “Your grandmother must be very scary,” I said.

    “She ate a live whippet once,” said Addie, “which is pretty scary, especially during a wedding.”

    “What did the bride and groom say?”

    “She was the bride.”  (loc. 1431)

    “What do I do?” asked the princess.

    “You keep your head down.”

    She looked at me petulantly.  “Like hell I will.  If we’re going to die, I’m going to go down fighting, even if I’m terrible with a weapon.”

    “Fair enough,” I said, and handed her a cutlass.  She swished it around.

    “Pointy end toward the bad guy, right?”

    “Right.”  (loc. 3176)

Kindle Details...

    The Eye of Zoltar sells for $9.99 at Amazon.  Book One, The Last Dragonslayer, sells for $5.03.  Book Two, The Song of the Quarkbeast, goes for $6.15.

“Death cannot be avoided forever, but it can be postponed – it’s very much like doing the dishes.”  (loc. 1968)

    In several ways, The Eye of Zoltar was shockingly different from the first two books in the series.  First, the tone of the story is much “darker”.  There’s a lot more violence, and some good characters die, with even good wizards not being exempt.  We are a long way from the lighthearted silliness of the bridge-building contest in The Song of the Quarkbeast.

    All of the storyline threads are not tied up at the end, which is very unusual for a Fforde tale.  And the ending, while not exactly a cliffhanger, does leave the reader in the lurch.  There will definitely be a Book 4 in this series, and right now, Wikipedia is saying it will be 2016 before it comes out.

    OTOH, the series’ storyline now has some direction, and we have an updated idea of who the major players are going to be, besides our main protagonist, Jennifer.  It will be interesting to see whether the tone of Book 4 is similarly “LOTR dark”, or if it returns to “Hobbit-like lightness".

    8 Stars.  The Eye of Zoltar is a good read, but not quite up to the level of the first two books, which were fantastic.

The Song of the Quarkbeast - Jasper Fforde

    2011; 289 pages.  Book Two  (out of 3) in The Last Dragonslayer series  New Author? : No.  Genre : YA; Fantasy.  Overall Rating : 9½*/10.

    In the Ununited Kingdom, Kazam and iMagic have long been competitors in the Wizardry business.  Now King Snodd IV has decreed that the rivalry shall be settled once and for all via a bridge-building contest, with the losers being assimilated into the winning company.

    Kazam isn’t worried.  It has five wizards to iMagic’s three, and more overall wizardly talent.  Even three on three would be no problem.  One on three might be a bit dicey, but hey, that would only happen if the iMagic baddies stooped to skullduggery.

    And they wouldn’t dare to that without royal consent, would they?

What’s To Like...

    The Song of the Quarkbeast is the sequel to The Last Dragonslayer (reviewed here), and once again is told in the first person POV by the foundling, Jennifer Strange.  This time the focus is on her job as business agent for Kazam, not on her being the Last Dragonslayer "chosen one".  And while she’s still the main protagonist, the sorcerers she manages are now highlighted more.  If you like Rincewind and the rest of the lovably zany Discworld wizards, you’ll like this group too.

    The dragons from the first book take a break, but the quarkbeasts are back, along with Mysterious X, Hector the Transient Moose, and a kewl new critter called a memory-dog.  The reason behind the title doesn’t show up until 84%-Kindle, but it’s worth the wait.

    There’s a lot more ink given to spellcasting here, and the mechanics of the magic system are fleshed out in greater detail.  The Ultimate Evil dude does not disappoint in his badness, but he is also conniving, resourceful, and diabolically charming.

    The ending is stellar.  Every time you think Evil has been vanquished, Jasper Fforde contrives to turn the tables on our heroes, with the situation turning increasingly dire.  Yet the tone remains light throughout, as would be expected of a YA novel, and this is a “clean” tale – no cussing, alcohol, etc.  The closest we get to romance and sex is Jennifer almost getting to go on her first date.

Kewlest New Word...

Squiffy (adj.) : crooked; askew; awry  (a Britishism; the more common definition is “slightly drunk”)

Excerpts...

    “You’re going to have to find the ring within thirty seconds,” announced Lady Mawgon, “and since it might be tricky to find in the rank, fetid, disease-ridden, muddy water, you’ll need my help.”

    “You’re coming down, too?”

    “Good Lord, no.  What do you think I am?  An idiot?”

    “I’m not sure it would be healthy for me to answer that question,” replied Tiger carefully.  (loc. 321)

    The King stepped up to the royal microphone and made a long, rambling speech about how proud he was that the hard toil of a blindly trusting citizenry kept him and his family in the lap of luxury while war widows begged on the streets, and how he thanked providence that he had been blessed to rule over a nation whose inexplicable tolerance toward corrupt despots was second to none.  The speech was well received and some citizens were even moved to tears.  (loc. 2125)

Kindle Details...

    The Song of the Quarkbeast sells for $6.15 at Amazon.  Book One, The Last Dragonslayer, sells for $2.80.  Book Three, The Eye of Zoltar, goes for $9.99.

“Do I have to go down a well upside down while being sarcastic with a shoe tied around my neck?”  (loc. 318)

    I can't think of anything to quibble about in The Song of the Quarkbeast.  Both the writing and the storytelling are topnotch.  Some characters are lost, some are found, and at least one is found temporarily and lost again.  The pacing is quick, there’s plenty of action, and as always, Fforde’s wit will keep you chuckling.

    The worst I can say is that the writing of this series delays more books in the Thursday Next, Nursery Crimes, and Shades of Grey (not to be confused with Fifty Shades of Grey) series.

    9½ Stars.  Highly recommended as a fun, light, exciting read for both young and adult readers.  I’ve yet to be disappointed by anything written by Jasper Fforde.

The Last Dragonslayer - Jasper Fforde

    2012; 287 pages.  Book One  (out of 3) in The Last Dragonslayer series  New Author? : No.  Genre : YA; Fantasy.  Overall Rating : 8*/10.

    Lately, magic has been getting rather scarce in the Ununited Kingdoms.  Sure, there are still sorcerers around, but instead of conjuring up storms and moving mountains, they’ve been reduced to (magically) unclogging drains, rewiring houses, and eradicating moles from lawns.  And just like a dying battery, every use of magic seems to drain the pool of it some more.

    Even worse, the last dragon, Maltcassion, is rumored to be old and dying.  And some say that when he dies, there will be no more magic at all.

    Meanwhile, at the Kazam Mystical Arts Management, young Jennifer Strange is still quite busy.  Not doing magic, of course; Jennifer’s been tested, and she’s got no talent for that.  But even sorcerers have bills to pay, and someone has to take care of the business end of magic-for-hire.

    And someone needs to take care of a bunch of fading, pouting wizards.  At least until the magic runs out.

What’s To Like...

    The Last Dragonslayer is Jasper Fforde’s first foray into YA fantasy.  I have high expectations of anything Forde writes, and, as always, he does not disappoint.

    There are a bunch of outstanding characters to get acquainted with.  The magic-weavers that our protagonist, Jennifer, has to deal with, are a fascinating and varied group – a storm conjuror (at least she used to be able to do this), one that communicates on a subconscious level, a beguiler, and a pre-cognitive (he can predict the future, but it's usually useless), among others.  Oooh, and don’t forget the Quarkbeast, the dragon Maltcassion, and Hector the Transient Moose. They’re all delightful.

    This is YA literature, so everything is 100% clean – no sex, no drugs, no booze, etc.  Jennifer Strange may be coming of age, but there’s no romance (at least in this book), which is a refreshing change of pace for a YA fantasy offering with a teenage female lead.

    The plotline is not particularly twisty, but the pacing is quick, and young readers won’t get bored at all.  There are some serious themes to muse upon as well – the senselessness of war, the role of business in promoting war, and the power of propaganda to seduce people into accepting a war mentality.  The ending is superb.

Kewlest New Word...

Scatty (adj.) : absentminded and disorganized; scatterbrained.  (a Britishism)

Others : Bollard (n.).

Excerpts...

    It’s not a good idea to have civilians around when sorcery is afoot.  Even the stoutest incantations carry redundant strands of spell that can cause havoc if allowed to settle on the general public.  Nothing serious ever happened; it was mostly rapid nose hair growth, oinking like a pig, blue pee, that sort of stuff.  It soon wore off, but it was bad for business.  (loc. 109)

    “He called me Gwanjii.”

    “Ah,” replied Feldspar solemnly, “that is an old dragon word.  A word that one dragon might use to another perhaps twice in his lifetime.”

    “What does it mean?”

    “Friend.”  (loc. 2524)

Kindle Details...

    The Last Dragonslayer sells for $2.24 at Amazon, which frankly is a fantastic price for a Jasper Fforde novel, even if it is YA.  The rest of his books fall in the $6.15-$12.18 range..

Working with those versed in the Mystical Arts was sometimes like trying to knit with wet spaghetti: just when you thought you’d gotten somewhere, it all came to pieces in your hands.  (loc. 54)

    The quibbles are few.  Once again, methane gas is presented as having a disagreeable odor.  Folks, methane is odorless.  Yes, natural gas is methane, and it stinks.  But that’s because municipalities add a small amount of mercaptan to it so people can detect gas leaks.

    The resolution of Gordon, the apprentice dragonslayer, felt rushed and rather unbelievable.  He was quite the clever one, yet committed an elementary blunder.

    Finally, there are a bunch of loose threads that never get tied up, but I suspect these will be addressed as the series rolls along.

    8 Stars.  I enjoyed The Last Dragonslayer, despite not being the target audience, and it satisfied my Jasper Fforde thirst without me having to reread one of his earlier books.  Add ½ star if you are a young adult reader who likes to read Fantasy, cuz this is going to be right down your alley.

The Woman Who Died A Lot - Jasper Fforde

    2012; 363 pages.  New Author? : No.  Book #7 of the Thursday Next series.  Genre : Fantasy; Alternate Universe; Humor.  Overall Rating : 8½*/10.

    The end of the world is coming; an asteroid is headed our way.  Hey, but that’s 37 years in the future, so who cares?  Much more timely is the Smiting by The Almighty, scheduled for four days from now, and due to hit Swindon, Thursday Next’s hometown.

    But Thursday has more-pressing problems of her own.  Her nemesis, Goliath Corp., wants to do some personal smiting to her.  Her son Friday is predestined to kill somebody this coming weekend.  There is a job opening in her current employer, Spec-Ops, but they want somebody younger and would prefer to put Thursday out to pasture as a librarian.

    And last but not least, daughter Jenny has been very reclusive lately.

What’s To Like...

    For those readers new to the series, Jasper Fforde deftly weaves the 6-book backstory into the first quarter or so of The Woman Who Died A Lot.  This was a nice refresher for me, since it’s been two years since I read the previous book in the series.  Nevertheless, it’s better if you don’t treat the books as standalones, and read them in order, starting with The Eyre Affair (reviewed here).

    There is a lot to like about any Jasper Fforde offering, and this one is no exception.  The writing is witty and page-turning.   There are fictitious quotes to start each chapter; these set the subject matter and are always a delight to read.  The alt-worldly ads that appear at the back of each book are included in the Kindle version; just keep scrolling until you get to them.  There are a couple of way-kewl drawings scattered throughout the text, and of course, Chapter 13 is once again in a class by itself.

    There are several unique delights to TWWDAL.  A couple long-running plotlines are resolved.  It would be a spoiler to say which ones; and of course, you can never be completely sure that they’ll stay resolved, what with the author’s penchant for plot twists.  Fforde also spoofs the currently hot topic of Quantum Physics, and in doing so, introduces a new alternate universe - Dark Reading Matter.

    The ending is great; it was in no way telegraphed, and the addition of a bit of Situational Ethics was sheer genius.

Kewlest New Word. . .

    Nobble (v.) : To try to influence or thwart (someone or something) by underhanded or unfair methods.  (a Britishism)

Excerpts...

    Suffice it to say there were a shade over six thousand entirely separate dimensions within the League of Alternative Realities – a tiny fraction of the total, but you didn’t get to join the league until you’d figured out how to move across, something that now seemed so blindingly obvious it’s astonishing we couldn’t see it before.  Our own dimension was coded ID-11 and was the only league member with diphtheria, David Hasselhoff and the French, which amused the rest of the multiverse no end.  (loc. 239)

    “And what news of Swindon?” asked Mother Daisy.  “We have no radio, no TV, and only The Toad on Sunday once a month.”

    “There’s a new roundabout in the Old Town, Acme Carpets is having another sale, SpecOps is to be re-formed – oh, and part of the city is to be wiped from the earth by a cleansing fire on Friday.”

    “An Acme Carpets sale?”  (loc. 2105)

Kindle Details...

    The Woman Who Died A Lot sells for $7.99 at Amazon, which is quite reasonable.  The other six books in the series are priced in the $9.99-$10.99 range for the Kindle.  I borrowed this e-book for free from my local library.

”To me, grass is simply a transitional phase for turning sunlight into milk.”  (loc. 149)

    There are a couple quibbles.  In addition to the backstory, the first quarter of the book presents about five plotlines, and it’s a long time before the reader figures out which one takes precedence.  Also, ANAICT, this is the first book in the series that had zero excursions into BookWorld.  Quantum Mechanics seems to have trumped Literary themes.  However, that may be a plus to a lot of readers.

    The good news is that there will be a sequel (remember when we all feared book #5 was the end of the series?).  The bad news is that there is no target date, and Jasper Fforde seems to be concentrating on a couple of his other series.

    8½ Stars.  Highly recommended, but please read the books in order.  Subtract 1 star if you jump right in with this one being your introduction to Jasper Fforde and Thursday Next; and be prepared to be fascinated, but confused, by the wacky weirdness.

One of Our Thursdays is Missing - Jasper Fforde

2011; 562 pages, plus a couple of way kewl ads in the back.  Book #6 in the "Thursday Next" series.  New Author? : No.  Genre : Literary Fiction; Humor.  Overall Rating : 8¼*/10.

    The title says it all.  The "real world" Thursday is MIA, and so the "written" Thursday is summoned and commissioned to find her.  But the world of fiction is a big place, plus it's just as likely that she's lost in the real world somewhere.

    Oh, there's also an imminent war brewing in BookWorld (between Racy Novel and the combined forces of Women's Fiction and Comedy) that threatens the steady supply of Metaphors.  It needs to be averted before blood is spilled.  Well, not blood.  Before ink and letters are spilled.

What's To Like...
    This is Jasper Fforde and that means good writing, keen wit, and gadding around in the wonderful otherworld of Fiction.  For One Of Our Thursdays Is Missing, Fforde has completely revamped Fiction Island.  It's now on the inside of a giant, hollow sphere and my printed version of OOOTIM has a detailed map to help you keep your bearings.  I'm told the Kindle omits the map.

    Mrs. Malaprop and Pickwick (a dodo with an attitude) are back, and they're a hoot.  Thursday also picks up an android butler named Sprockett, who's kind of a cross between C-Threepio and Jeeves.

    There are a half-dozen or so nicely-done illustrations scattered throughout the book; a zillion nods by Fforde to other authors and novels; and every fiction cliché there is, including the obligatory chase scene.  There are plot twists galore, and with a dozen trite endings to choose from, Fforde somehow manages to come up with something ...ahem... novel.

Kewlest New Word...
Mistral : a strong, dry, cold, northerly wind that blows across southern France.

Excerpts...
    And that was when the doorbell rang.  This was unusual, as random things rarely occur in the mostly predetermined BookWorld.  I opened the door to find three Dostoyevski-vites staring at me from within a dense cloud of moral relativism.
    "May we come in?" said the first, who had the look of someone weighed heavily down with the burden of conscience.  "We were on our way home from a redemption-through-suffering training course."  (pg. 18)

    "Flekk's the worst gossip in the city.  I've a feeling you've got less than forty minutes before the press starts to knock at the door, two hours before the police arrive with an arrest warrant and three hours before President van de Poste demands you hand over the plans."
    "What plans?"
    "The secret plans."
    "I don't have any secret plans."
    "I'd keep that to yourself."  (pg. 314)

"Eggs tincture is too good for that burred ... but isle do as Uri quest."  (pg. 43, and a fine example of Mrs. Malaprop's malapropisms.)
    As with all of Jasper Fforde's novels, OOOTIM is a literary feast.  But the first part of the book is, to be frank, a bit too rich.  There are so many bon mots that they tend to block out the plot.  Maybe this is Fforde's way to get us familiar with his new Fiction Island, but that's what the map is for.  There's a whole chapter devoted to a "mimefield" that has no discernible relevance.

    But not to worry.  The plot climbs back up onstage about halfway through, and the story is impeccable thereafter.

    The Thursday Next books are not stand-alones.  They really should be read in order.  So if you're an avid fiction reader, and are not familiar with this series, pick up The Eyre Affair and get started.  You are in for a treat.  8¼ Stars.

Shades Of Grey - Jasper Fforde

2009; 388 pages. Full Title : Shades of Grey - The Road To High Saffron. New Author? : No. Genre : Contemporary Fiction. Overall Rating : 9*/10.

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Jasper Fforde ventures into dystopian fiction with Shades Of Grey. It is set at least a half-millenium in the future, after a catastrophic-but-undetailed "Something That Happened". We're presumably on earth; presumably near a coast in Great Britain.

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It is a world where people can only see one color, and even then only to varying degrees. No one can see at all in the dark. The story centers around Eddie Russett, who moves to East Carmine with his dad, who is going to be their Color Swatchman (a healer via colors). East Carmine is at the edge of the wilds, where the rigid rules of Society are occasionally bent just a wee bit.

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Eddie is betrothed to one Constance Oxford, who's definitely a step up for the Russett family lineage. He's happy with this lot until he meets Jane G-23, a lowly Grey, who's intriguing, rebellious, and therefore tantalizingly dangerous.

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What's To Like...

It's Jasper Fforde, so it's well-written and well-paced, and he's a master at detailing a vivid, strange land (even if it is monochromatic here), which makes it easy to become immersed in the storyline. Shades Of Grey is a page-turner, despite being just the first book of a new Fforde trilogy.

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Overall, it's the standard Dystopian Uber-Plot. The happy protagonist's eyes are opened, he starts to think, starts to question the Society, becomes a threat, and finds the Society taking appropriate steps against him. Some were disappointed that Fforde doesn't add anything new to the dystopian formula, but I don't think there's a lot of ways to vary it. What Fforde does do is present it in a new light - there's a subtle tongue-in-cheekiness tone that's not been done before in Dystopian Lit. And the idea of color-perception being the determinus of the societal caste system is kewl and innovative.

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Kewl New Words...

Retroussé : upturned at the end, as a nose. Mullioned : divided by horizontal bars, as a window. Spall : to break up into chips or fragments. Nobbled : disabled; hobbled (British). Farrago : a motley mess.

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Excerpts...

The Word of Munsell was the Rules, and the Rules were the Word of Munsell. They regulated everything we did, and had brought peace to the Collective for nearly four centuries. They were sometimes very odd indeed. The banning of the number that lay between 72 and 74 was a case in point, and no one had ever fully explained why it was forbidden to count sheep, make any new spoons or use acronyms. (pg. 29)

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"Do you want some advice? Go home. You're far too inquisitive, and here in East Carmine curiosity only ends one way."

"Death?"

"Worse - enlightenment." (pg. 110)

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"If you enjoyed laughing in the face of death, you might like to have a crack at High Saffron. One hundred merits, and all you have to do is take a look."

"I understand there's a one hundred percent fatality rate?"

"True. But up until the moment of death there was a one hundred percent survival rate. Really, I shouldn't let anything as meaningless as statistics put you off." (pg. 178)

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Curiosity is a descending stair

That leads only who-knows-where. (pg. 23)

The quibbles are minor. Shades Of Grey ends a bit abruptly, and the next installment isn't due out until 2014. That's a long time to be left hanging onto a cliff.

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The plusses overwhelm the minuses. Fforde's wit abounds, the storyline is engaging, and you'll love the world that he paints for you, its dystopian character notwithstanding. We can now chalk up another literary genre that Fforde shows himself to be a master of. 9 Stars.

Thursday Next - First Among Sequels - Jasper Fforde

2007; 362 pages. #5 in the Thursday Next series (or #6, if you count "The Great Samuel Pepys Fiasco"). Genre : Fictional Book-Jumping. Overall Rating : 9*/10.

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It's been 14 years since the events in Something Rotten. Thursday Next is now ostensibly living a quiet life with hubby Landen and three kids (Friday, Tuesday, and Jenny). She's working for a carpet company, but the carpet company is a front for the officially disbanded SpecOps, and SpecOps is a front for Thursday's job with Jurisfiction.

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Trouble is a-brewin'. There's a Stupidity Surplus in England and Reading Rates are down. Cheese-smuggling is rampant and the Minotaur is still on the loose. The Hades family is back in action, as is Goliath Corp. Not only is The End Of Time rapidly approaching, but what they do to Pride And Prejudice is absolutely intolerable.

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What's To Like...

It's vintage Fforde - lots of threads and lots of wit. There are multiple Thursdays, multiple Fridays, multiple timelines, and lots of books-jumping. Fforde teases you with oodles of plot detail tidbits, and you have to figure out whether they're red herrings, MacGuffins, loose ends, or integral parts of one of the plotlines. There's some of each.

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Some old friends are back. Uncle Mycroft has died, but his ghost still putters around in the workshop. Pickwick has lost all her feathers and needs a knitted sweater. Even the Cat Formerly Known as Cheshire shows up.

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The book gets off to a slow start. Fforde spends a lot of time with the back-story, especially explaining how all the SpecOps and Jurisfiction departments are set up. After a hundred pages, I was beginning to wonder when the action would begin. I shouldn't've worried. The last 250 pages are fantastic.

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Kewl New Words...

Marram : a type of grass usually found on beaches. Profligate : wildly extravagant. Duvet : a soft quilt, usually filled with down. Privet : a European shrub, commonly used to make hedgerows.

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Excerpts...

"Splendid! I just had an idea for a cheap form of power : by bringing pasta and antipasta together, we could be looking at the utter annihilation of ravioli and the liberation of vast quantities of energy. I safely predict that an average-size cannelloni would be able to power Swindon for over a year. Mind you, I could be wrong." (pg. 18)

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"...and the first classic to be turned into a reality book show?"

"Pride and Prejudice, announced Yogert proudly. "It will be renamed The Bennets and will be serialized live in your household copy the day after tomorrow. Set in starchy early-nineteenth-century England, the series will feature Mr. and Mrs. Bennet and their five daughters being given tasks and then voted out of the house one by one, with the winner going on to feature in Northanger Abbey, which itself will be the subject of more 'readeractive' changes." (pg. 272-73)

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Paragraph Lost...

This was a delightful read, so it rates Nine Stars. First Among Sequels ends by setting up the next book, which is titled "One of our Thursdays is Missing".

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My only concern is whether Fforde's getting burnt out on the Thursday Next tales. This book came out in 2007. He's promised us at least one more book in the "Nursery Crime" series; and his most-recent offering is Shades Of Grey, the first story in a new trilogy. Will he run out of new twists in the book-jumping theme? Is he looking for novel challenges? Oh well. Even if it ends with the next installment, it's been fun following Thursday's exploits.