The Better Mousetrap - Tom Holt

    2008; 345 pages.  New Author? :No.  Genres : Humorous Fantasy; Time Travel; Satire.  Overall Rating : 9*/10.

 

    Wouldn’t it be great to own a time machine?

 

    You could go back into the past and observe great events, while being careful, of course, not to do anything to change history.  Computer simulations should avoid that.

 

    Or you could go forward in time, watch some future Super Bowl or World Cup tournament, come back, and bet on the winners.  Although that might draw unwanted attention to your rapid monetary gains.

 

    But the smartest thing might be to do what Frank Carpenter does.  Get a job with an insurance company, go back in time, and prevent fatal accidents to clients which would result in huge payouts on their life insurance policies.  Insurance companies would gladly pay you a portion of the premiums and you would get rich without attracting attention.

 

    It is/was/will-be a foolproof plan.

 

What’s To Like...

    The Better Mousetrap is the fifth book in Tom Holt’s 8-volume “J.W. Wells & Co.” series, of which I’ve read half, although not in any particular order.  I read Book 1, The Portable Door, way back in 2012 (reviewed here, so I appreciated the author inserting a recap of that plotline into this book early on.  J.W. Wells & Co. specializes in providing magical items, beings, spells, and full-fledged sorcerers to their clients, although by the time of this fifth book, the corporation was pretty much defunct.

 

    The storyline commences with a relatively easy task for Frank: go back in time and prevent a girl named Emily Spitzer from falling out of a tree to her death while trying to rescue her pet cat.  Emily’s in the pest control business, meaning she gets tasked with removing pests such as trolls, hydras, goblins, and dragons from our dimension.  She’s good at it, so it’s weird that an easy-peasy act of falling from a tree proves to be her downfall.  Frank adjusts the timeline, saves Emily, but she dies again shortly thereafter.  Hmm.  This smells of evildoers determined to snuff her out for some reason.

 

    As is true for all Tom Holt novels, things rapidly get more complicated.  Frank’s dog disappears.  Frank colleague disappears.  A dying dragon seems to value a small artifact more than the millions of dollars he’s nesting on.  Office politics threatens to turn deadly.

 

    As is also true of any Tom Holt novel, the writing is replete with wit, absurdity, and fascinating characters; all of which keeps the reader turning the pages.  Please note that the book is written in English, not American, which leads to weird spellings (such as tyres and chequebooks), and weird words, a couple of which are given below.

 

    Everything builds to a surprise ending, via the entire final chapter, which somehow manages to tie up all the plot threads.  Well, with one exception, which involves a surprise visit by two new-yet-recurring characters.  This may or may not be a teaser for Book 6, May Contain Traces of Magic, awaiting my attention.

 

Excerpts...

    ”I was round at your office just now.”

    “Oh yes?”

    Nod.  “When I say just now,” he went on, “I mean about an hour and a half in the future.  You hadn’t shown up for your lunch, you see, and I was . . . Well, anyway, I asked if you were in your office and they said no.  Actually, they said that you’d been killed.”

    She took it quite well.  True, her eyes widened and her mouth fell open like the tailgate of the lorry off the back of which all good things fall, but she didn’t faint or scream or any of the things he was fairly sure that he’d have done in her shoes.  “Oh,” she said.  (pg. 146)

 

   “Hello, are you there?”

    En route to the kettle, Frank stopped and watched Emily.  She’d gone ever such a funny colour, and she seemed to have forgotten about breathing and stuff.  Then she smiled.

    “Mr. Gomez,” she said.  “I’m glad you called.  I’m going to kill you.”

    “What?  It’s not a terribly good line, you’ll have to speak—”

    “And when I’ve done that,” Emily went on, “I’m going to chop you up into little bits and feed you to the piranhas in Sally Krank’s office.  Oh, and I quit.  Goodbye.”  (pg. 242)

 

Kewlest New Word ...

Pipped to the post (phrase) : overcoming a strong competitor in a sporting event.  (British slang)

Others: Doddle (n.); Moggy (n.); Havered (v.).

 

Ratings…
    Amazon: 4.5*/5, based on 534 ratings and 28 reviews.

    Goodreads: 4.02*/5, based on 1,232 ratings and 76 reviews.

 

When you’re Amanda Carrington you don’t need to be subtle, in the same way elephants don’t need wellington boots.  (pg. 209)

    There’s not a lot of cussing in The Better Mousetrap.  I noted just 8 instances in the first 10%, all of which were variations of the common four-lettered cusswords.  Later on, the “female dog” term showed up about a half-dozen times.  I don’t recall any adult situations.

 

    I spotted only one typo, and strangely it occurs on the back-cover blurb, not in the book itself.  There, a damsel named June is touted as a major character, but she never appears in the story.  It turns out “June” is really the character “Emily”, and who knows when and why her name was changed.  I'd blame this on the English-to-American conversion, except I was reading the British publication.

 

    Overall, I thought this was one of Tom Holt’s best efforts at Absurdist Fantasy.  I loved that fact that, where most authors in this genre caution doing anything that will change our historical timeline, Tom Holt seems to revel in doing so.  I’m gradually working my way through Tom Holt’s existing novels, the latest of which came out in 2023.  Wikipedia lists his age as 64 as of the writing of this review.  Here’s hoping that he is working on his next bestseller.

 

    9 Stars.  One last thing.  On page 176, there’s a passing mention of a writer named Hasdrubal.  I proud to say that’s also my literary son’s name.  Kewlness!